Visiting my husbands grave...

[secrets22]

Today i drove 26 miles to Memorial Woodlands to visit my David's grave and place flowers and i coped quite well,but i had many thoughts of I coud've,I should've,I would've,but all to no avail of course.We all have an allotted span and non of us know how long that span will be,and as a human we all make mistakes and wish some things could have been different.Regrets, we all have a few and often they are to few to mention,but they are always hovering in the background,and sometimes they hit us quite hard when memories resurface.

Standing by his grave it made me realise he is not there,but it is a reminder of the sweet and special times he was there,and it also reminded me of the life i now have,which is manageable,but is solitary.

I do have a large number of friends,but i do say 'friends' with reservations,as the word friend is bandied about so much and half the time they are only acquaintances ,but even so i do appreciate them.

I do go out quite a lot socially now the Spring is here,and we have plenty of fun and laughter,but its then coming home to an empty house that my realisation of being alone kicks in,except of course i do have 2 little 4 legged doggy friends who keep me company,they are indeed life savers.

All of us at some stage will be alone and on our own,but that is indeed the way life has always been,and always will be ,so enjoy the wonderful times whilst you can and savour every moment,for those special moments are quite rare and have to be embraced and nurtured.

[Arymretep]

Lovely post, it’s nice to have somewhere to visit and take flowers , I regularly visits my parents grave as it is local to me and I find it very comforting thinking about my wonderful childhood, that’s the thing we’ll always have our memories , no one can take those away from us, take care

[Agora1]

secrets22, what a beautiful tribute to your husband as well as a reminderfor all of us to live in the moment as we are not guaranteed tomorrow. xx

[Hidden in reply to Agora1]

Thats a valuable lesson I will take with me from covid is that nothing is guaranteed to anyone and also to never take anything for granted again.

Also I found covid was a great lesson in learning strategies to be patient whilst having to wait like stepping away for a cup of tea when you start getting upset.

[Hidden]

Good for you for getting out more socially.

Thats true none of us can predict our lifespans which makes it important to live for today as tomorrow is guaranteed to no one.

[Hidden]

How are you and Prince Pixie getting on?

We are all fine here and have had a quiet day in after the excitement of yesterday with the unconditional job offer and the funfair and the visit to the lido and caught up with preparing veg and cooking and catching up with the washing as well.

Baby is great and is enjoying the sunshine and is getting her ears creamed with sun cream as she is fair skinned and gets sunburnt same as we do.

[Hidden]

With me I'm excited about starting my new job but nervous as well as I don't know anyone in the pharmacy department where I will be working.

Many years ago I was starting a New job in a bakery after having worked as a catering assistant at a place for 6 years and on the Saturday before I was due to start on the following Monday I had been terrified!

[Lovetheoutdoors]

What a special post. Life does indeed change. What's the saying, Life is what happens when you are busy making plans.Memories stay with you. My Mum wrote a poem which she left for us. Shall I post it.

[secrets22 in reply to Lovetheoutdoors]

Oh yes,please post the poem.x

[Lovetheoutdoors]

This is the poem my Mum left for us.

To our wonderful daughter and sonsTo all our dearest and nearest loved ones.

Do not be sad if one day we sleep

Our important appointment with God to keep

We will go to His heaven beyond earths sky

And wait till you join us when years have gone by.

Remember God would not have given us birth

If he thought our life would end on earth

From a small dry seed a lovely flower is grown

Another miracle from death, a rebirth like our own.

We know we can always trust in Gods love

To give us a place in his world above

There we live a life that never ends

Joined together with family and friends.

Ashes to ashes and dust to dust

But in God we must place our trust

For us a new life will dawn

Like a flower we will be reborn

So, do not worry just think of the past

How happy we were, however long our life did last.

Be happy, Mum.

Admin delete if not allowed.

[secrets22 in reply to Lovetheoutdoors]

very moving indeed...thank you.

[Blue_81]

Beautiful post.

[Midori]

You are right, he isn't there, he is in your memories and those of your friends and relations. I don't visit my families' graves; They are a long way away and I cannot drive any more because of failing eyesight.

I light a candle to remember my loved ones, on certain days, Birthdays, and other significant dates; or if I just want to think of them.

You carry them all with you, in your heart.

Cheers, Midori

[CoderMom]

I have been alone now for 17 + years and I am over the point of it being a blessing, needed, a time of growth, healing, quiet solitude, time to enjoy my space. I SO VERY MUCH want a husband to laugh with and love and spend time with and enjoy every moment I can with, but I am also facing some major health issues and I am completely alone facing them. I am so over being single. I have one friend and he is keeping me at a distance any more. We have been close friends for 4 years now and as my health issues worsened, I have seen him back away and it kills me inside. I hope you have a better outcome and find that special man who will cherish you. I would not wish a life of solitude on anyone.