Battling Depression

[HopefulAR]

Hello everyone, I am new to this site and hoping to meet supportive individuals to help me fight through my depression. I have been battling depression since the age of 14, took meds for a few years, and decided I didn't want to take them anymore and wanted to fight the fight on my own. I did great for many years, a little struggle here and there but quickly shook away the thoughts, shifted my focus to positive things. Unfortunately, my life has experienced some negative interruptions that I have been dealing with for about 2 months and I just can't mentally do this anymore. I can't control the depression anymore which has caused me to feel constantly anxious about the past, the present, the future. I constantly have headaches, troubling falling asleep, wake up at odd times, and have trouble falling back asleep. My moods shift and my relationships suffer. I am constantly just feeling down, even in the happiest settings. I aspire to be this happy, positive woman that I know I can be, like a ray of sunshine, but instead, I have this dark cloud hovering over me. Does anyone else relate? How do you cope?

[Lefty_Epee]

First, welcome to HealthUnlocked! There are plenty of people on here who will help you in any way on your mental health journey! This community especially is very active and has the nicest, and some of the most intelligent folks I've met! Second, I too am in a similar position. I allowed my conditions to become me, and it lead me down some very dark paths, and put me with some very manipulative and abusive people. My advice on coping right now is love, therapy, and finding something to live for. Love can be whatever you need it to be. I have external love, but right now I'm working on self love. To aid in this I'm using positive affirmations. I recommend therapy because having someone to talk to is always vital to healing. It doesn't matter who you talk to, just make sure you're not pushing everything down or self-internalizing. As far as something to live for, that's the hardest part. This part is imperative. What's keeping me going is the girl I'm hoping to marry one day. What keeps you going can be literally anything. Now that I've unloaded this spiel on you, once again, welcome to HealthUnlocked, and happy healing! Have a wonderful day!

[HopefulAR in reply to Lefty_Epee]

Thank you for the warm welcome! It seems I have begun doing the right things here; I'll be starting therapy this week, and my 2 kiddos have always been my purpose to not loose my battle with depression, they give me so much love. Without them, I would not be here. Thank you for sharing your knowledge! 😀

[HopefulAR]

Thank you so much! I just messaged you.

[RupertBrown]

I could write a very long reply about how to cope. But it would all be bad advice. I can definitely relate though. All I can say is don't be too hard on yourself. Just try to really accept that some days or weeks are worse than others and that's okay. Sometimes we put a lot of pressure on ourselves to this perfect version of ourselves. When we inevitably fail to live up to that (because nobody's perfect) it just becomes something else to feel bad about. It becomes a trap. Go easy on on yourself and reach put if you need support or understanding. We'll be there. Almost forgot, welcome to the group! Hope you find what you're looking for.

[HopefulAR in reply to RupertBrown]

Thank you!!🙂

[autumnmarie5]

Welcome to Health Unlocked, my friend! I am fairly new as well and have found this website has really helped me feel less alone in my struggles. You've already made a great step by taking the initiative to be honest on a public forum and seeking help. That is amazing! I can't say I can completely relate to your depression, however I can relate to your constant anxiety about your past, present, and future. That part is very hard to cope with and I am STILL learning coping mechanisms. I am on antidepressants for my anxiety and they seem to help some but doesn't take my anxiousness away completely. I know for me, I love a good hot shower to relax and then turn it to cold right after. It helps me feel better as well as nice cold water and staying hydrated. I also try not to stay up too late and make sure i'm in bed usually by 9:30 or so. I don't know if this helps any but this is what seems to help me. If you need anyone to talk to I am just a message away! I am looking to make more friends on this site as well. It can be difficult to remember but, you are not alone. I am always free to a conversation with no judgement or bias! Hope today is getting better for you

[HopefulAR in reply to autumnmarie5]

Thank you for the wonderful tips. I’m jotting all of these things down and will try each one as the days go by. I know everything will not work for me but I have to rule them out as I go. I am also here for you if u ever need to talk! Message me anytime.

[smurfgoddess]

I'm new here too and dealing with similar feelings. 25 years ago I received what I consider the best treatment, cognitive therapy. Medication was a band-aid for me, with just enough effect to get me through a year and half of counseling. I dropped the medication because trying to find the right one and the right dosage was causing me far too many anxious times. Cognitive therapy changed my life, though. However, my dysythmia means I will be living with this for my entire life, and there are so many times when I just want to stop because I don't feel capable of getting through. I've learned to live with the idea that I will probably never feel incredibly "happy" but that being occasionally "happy" is alright with me. I've done so well the past 25 years that I have to remind myself that I got this, I can do this, I can do all the small things that help me get through the moments, and that I've proven that I can do this and do this well. The small things I do to move me out of anxiety and depression are: music, talk, long walks, routine routine routine (I lay down at the same time no matter what, even if I don't think I can sleep---and I get up at the same time even if I don't want to), writing my story down, working on my hobbies (even if I have to force myself), texting everyone I love and telling them I love them, and leaning on my few friends for comfort. Sometimes I force myself out into the world, and get a pedicure (being around a stranger forces me to be kind and try to be in the moment, so it helps!). Then I ramp it up to finding new outlets and places where I understand people (like in this forum), find new stories from other people like me, and occasionally volunteer so I can show how I really feel (compassionate) and remind myself of how grateful I am for what I do have (which I am). If you can't find or afford a counselor right now, which I recommend to everyone, I've found it useful to call the local crisis hotline---and just talk to them. There are some amazing people on the hotlines who understand, and will take the time to help you figure out what you might be able to do right now, or tomorrow, or next week. There's no obligation, you don't have to be in a full-blown crisis to talk to them, and I always feel "not alone" when I'm done talking to them. Most of all, don't be hard on yourself. Be kind to yourself. Always. And, as Mr. Rogers used to say "Look for the healers".

[HopefulAR in reply to smurfgoddess]

You’re amazing! Thank your for sharing and showing me that I too can be brave. I didn’t realize the local crisis hotline was even an option, very good to know! Thank you for making me feel not alone.

[AdamFCastillo31]

Hi, it is sad to hear that you are going through and fighting depression. It is alarming that you are suffering from depression since your teenage and it is imperative that you consult an experienced psychiatrist at your earliest. Depression is not something to be taken lightly as it can lead to self-harm and harming others around you. Instead of trying to fight it on your own, seek professional help and you will start feeling better after a short time. You can consult medvidi, they are offering services for various mental ailments with a team of experienced and professional psychiatrists. One of my colleagues had a great experience with them and he overcame his depression after a continuous treatment of 8 months. I hope the information I have shared is helpful. Wishing you all the best. Get well soon.

[ZOO7]

Hi, I feel a very similar way to what you’ve described. I’m way more anxious these past few months. A while back I did take Lexapro for post part I’m depression. It helped a bit but then I’ve been able to manage for the past 10 years until this summer in July. I hit a brick wall. What keeps me going is my family and kids. I know they need me. I’ve tried deep breathing and recently started a yoga class. It’s helped a little. If you find techniques that work please share with me! I’d love to chat, we sound similar. You aren’t alone. One small step at a time….