Feel the fear...and then?

[quickblizzard]

I'm still struggling to really understand this concept. Ok, so in order to release anxiety, you have to feel it first. And then what? It's like, "Ok, anxiety, I see you, I feel you". And then shortly thereafter I'm awash in a torrent of anxiety, as if nothing else exists but it. Hell, my mind will pull up more thoughts to add to it! What in the heck am I supposed to do? Sit anxious and sleepless until whenever my brain has had enough?

And chasing every little anxious thought to try to convert it...I just don't have the energy for that. I know I'm doing something wrong, but what?

[Hidden]

It takes time to achieve the "Feel the Fear" and live with acceptance.

I have been at it for a few months now and things are slowly, but surely, beginning to get better. It is not something that happens overnight, unfortunately. We are so accustomed to handling it all in the same manner forever, it seems. It takes focus and determination to accept our thoughts and unlearn old behaviors and patterns.

For me it was not about sitting and waiting for my brain to have enough, it was about me having had enough of my brain, if this makes any sense at all.

I am slowly beginning to understand that the anxious thoughts, and the feelings that they drag along with them, can be ignored. I just don't care anymore, I have had enough. The thoughts and feelings come, they are there, I'm well aware of them, I just don't give them the attention they crave anymore. I keep going about my business and pay them no mind.

Again, this takes time, lots of time for some of us. Just think about how long you have been living this way. It can take some serious effort to change old habits.

Some wise words from a blog that I follow.......

"The only thing we can do is to let go, relax and allow ourselves to feel how we do at any particular moment. This is not about your mind or emotions being calm, this about you being calm behind it all."

[Hidden]

This is very true, glenninindy, not everyone can overcome their fears and anxiety this way, but if even just one person can, then it is so worth the effort. 🙏🏻

[Hope4me1]

I understand completely how you feel. I can have days of calm and complete bliss and normalcy. Then the anxiety in my chest and sense of doom comes out of nowhere and then I have some of the worse days and nights of my life. I am on meds and I try not to take too much Klonopin, only when needed and reduce when not needed. I practice meditation and positive affirmations and get exercise and eat healthy foods. Yet with all this I can’t control my worst days. I really suffer with them. I hope someday I can find an answer. Something needs to be changed. Maybe my meds. I suppose my dr and therapist need to know this is happening more severely than it’s been. I can’t go on like this. There are a lot of people with good advice on this site. Perhaps their wisdom will ease our fears.

[Daveacr1959]

That’s not how I deal with anxiety. I try to get 7-8 hours of sleep each night, because lack of sleep is anxiety causing. I get 45 minutes of cardio exercise daily to produce endorphins that battle your anxiety and depression. Then when I’m done with my morning or mid day Luke warm shower. I take a 5 minute pure cold shower. Google cold shower therapy for mental health. And I take my medicine the dr gave me. This all weakens the anxiety. Or makes it go away.

[blue77moon-forest]

I'm with you. Feeling the fear hasn't helped so far. Just want you to know you are not alone

[designguy]

Anxiety is a paradox, the more you struggle with it the more it persists. What has helped me is learning and practicing mindfulness in order to be able to disengage from my anxious thoughts and even feelings, knowing they are temporary and warning signs that my thinking is off. Learning to never believe your anxious thoughts and feelings is key. Acceptance means truly surrendering to the anxiety and being ok with it and just getting on with your activity and day. Trying to release it or any other technique is actively engaging it and just prolongs it. When you no longer fear the anxiety and don't care if you have it is when it dissolves. It takes time and willingness and a commitment to yourself. The reality is that by continuing to reject your anxiety you are rejecting a part of yourself. Make friends with that scared part of yourself and be compassionate and nurture it.

Another important thing is to make sure your hormones, thyroid and adrenals are all functioning correctly, they can cause or contribute to anxiety/depression if not.

The DARE Anxiety book, videos and program has helped me in embracing and accepting my anxiety with practical, helpful information and advice.