Anxiety according to the Internet ,it's as a natural response to stress but to me its more complex and baffling battle within me ,which occurs every single day at an unexpected time frame.
People in general are bothered by an uninvited guest .They confront them because they think they are obligated to do it or else their reputation may get ruined but oh boy!!!!! I had to deal with my version of uninvited guest these thoughts are just as bad as that or even more worse.
The thoughts start to possess me as a ghost ,making me feel like glitch in the Matrix ,sometimes feel like running in a endless dark tunnel ,searching for the way out of it . I am always restless because I fight with my own self every day.
Whenever I speak my truth about my anxiety ,People view me as a ungrateful human and make me feel like its my fault to even have anxiety in first place. the first time I was humiliated by my beloved friend ,I remember Being intimidated by my own feelings of sorrow and guilty because you know now a days strong ones are adored ,the weak ones are burden and no one really are willing to care or Listen. the whole point of being sad or having some kind of mental illness portrayed as if I am uncapable of controlling the matters of my own heart and mind ,in other words I was been labelled as attention seeker or drama queen .people in general view anxiety as inbuild human response in our body .
which gets triggered in an un-comfy situation but for someone like me ,its more upgraded version ,where the daily activities seems like a big task.
someone one asked me how it feels to be motivated .I said its like searching for water in desert ,very tough to be found but when you obtained it it feels like treasure. it just feels good after a long period of struggle.
In the end no matter how hard it is. I learned to deal with it . Fighting with ones own self brings no good. confront your thoughts let it come .every time you try this confrontation your anxiety levels start to go down . I cant say you will never experience anxiety again but you wont be bothered by it . at that point you will learn to discipline the unwanted thoughts and manage it to an extent.
nothing is easy until its done.
I feel like I have no one to turn to
The amazing feeling of having a post liked
Every 'No' feels like an insult or betrayal to me
I feel like giving up
How do you cope with feeling like a background character?
