Dwelling

[Delilah4860]

Hi all,

It's been a long time since I've posted or been active in this group so I guess it's a selfish push that's brought me back here but I rather desperately want some advice and to feel less ashamed.

It's been over a year now since I went through a pretty gnarly break up. Since then, so much of my mind has been preoccupied with this person, whether actively or passively, and I can't seem to get them out of my head and I am exhausted. I wouldn't say I'm obsessing over the details of our breakup or anything like that anymore, it's more of just this constant presence, something my mind slips to any and every chance it seems to get. I've made a lot of progress since the break up, and I am proud of myself and happy of what I've worked through. But it still gnaws on me, day in and day out, and I am so so tired of missing them, of thinking of them.

I've tried to distract my mind with other things when it happens, whether by thinking about something else that's going on in my life presently or even by counting and other techniques. But they're still just always there.

For awhile I let it happen, that just letting my thoughts come as they do and letting myself process is what it's just going to take. But at this point it doesn't feel healthy, I'm not processing anymore but just ruminating constantly.

I just want to feel free of this and have a mind of my own again. Any help or support is so incredibly appreciated.

D

[Jonnay]

hello. I suffer as well with overthinking when something serious like a break up has happened. The best advice I have is talk it out. To anyone !!! Let your thoughts flow u will feel better

[Delilah4860 in reply to Jonnay]

Thank you! I appreciate this advice. Sometimes it's hard, with it happening so long ago at this point I feel like none of my friends care to listen about anything regarding it anymore. It makes it harder to admit that it does sometimes still hurt.

[LulaBeth]

I think you should do a self care focus to start to treat and pamper yourself over the next few weeks. You need to fall back in love with you! Sweep yourself off of your feet.

[Delilah4860 in reply to LulaBeth]

I actually really love this , thank you for the suggestion <3 I'll have to start doing this more actively.

[froggymom88]

Hi Delilah! I have been there and it is very maddening when you feel like your thoughts are in control of you. Trying to distract yourself with other things is a good start Keep doing that but add to that prayer. I find praying for the person who seems to be involved with consuming my thoughts. I pray for there healing and happiness and what I find happening is that in time I am healed and I let go of that person. It does work. I will pray for you too.