Overwhelmed and Panicky

[nalia2020]

Hi everyone

So 2021 has been pretty damn crazy. This post is going to basically lay out all of my feelings that I have right now.

Like I said in my last post, I recently broke up with my ex boyfriend for multiple reasons. I am getting really close with one of my best friends and things seem to be moving in a good direction. I am a little worried that it’s moving too fast and we’re having too much fun and that something bad will happen eventually and ruin it all. He is just such a great guy and I really enjoy having him in my life. I’m just constantly stressed about everything I’m doing and saying and hoping that I don’t like scare him off or anything. And obviously, it’s not the end of the world if things don’t work out between us, but I really do like him a lot and I’m hopeful and optimistic about our future.

Next topic.

I am currently visiting some family that I haven’t seen in 2 years, my favorite family member to be exact. I was only able to visit for a few days because I wasn’t able to get too many days off work. Which is okay, it is completely worth it to be able to visit for even just a few days. I’m just really sad that I will have to leave and go back home tomorrow. I feel like the visit wasn’t long enough and I don’t know when I’ll see them again. Hopefully sooner than two years.

Next topic.

While visiting my family, I adopted a puppy! She will be coming home with me and I am beyond excited and happy. She is literally perfect and the sweetest dog I could ever find. The only issue is that because she’s still settling in, she’s having some potty training problems and is having a bunch of accidents which really stresses me out. I’m also worried about how the plane ride home will go, however I talked to her vet and he said he doesn’t think there will be any problems. So that makes me feel better.

Next topic.

I am feeling just generally overwhelmed right now and there so many emotions running through my head and yeah I’m overwhelmed with them. I’m trying to accept my feelings and just sit with them but it’s hard. I also keep falling into moments of derealization all day which is hard because those always make me so disoriented. But just typing this out makes me feel better because I feel like this always helps me accept it more and I am able to read this again later and remember how I was feeling.

Anyways, thank you everyone

[dani_g]

Hi nalia,I am happy for you that you were able to determine what was wrong enough to break up with your last bf - be careful with your bestie though ... would he be better as your beau or as your bestie? Sometimes the most beautiful relationships can come from knowing so much about each other prior to getting intimate ... I hope this works out ... but as I can say from my own personal current experiences, don't worry about the future or overthink it ... it's troubling and far too overwhelming and takes away from the fun and the intimacy of what we're trying to achieve!

I also am currently trying to coordinate visiting some family I haven't seen in years and while I am so excited for many reasons, I know I will be sad when it comes time to leave ... make it a priority to keep the time shorter than this time. Sometimes, life is just too powerful and we have to work extra hard to keep those important to us, close.

The puppy thing sounds so amazing! I am so happy for you! Dogs can be so healing and uplifting! I want one in the worst way, but my landlords won't allow it. I lost my dog in my divorce and I miss her badly.

Life is already so stressful - we need to just try to live our days one at a time and not let them control our inner selves... typing can help and replying to others can help too. You are so much more powerful than anything in life can put on your plate, and most of what we think is such a burden, is really just something that we don't need to stress about.

This is my first reply, as I just joined this group. I have plenty of my own current issues... but please know that you have support, no matter what, even if we don't know each other.

Dani

[nalia2020 in reply to dani_g]

Thank you so much!!! I’ve had this puppy for like 12 hours and she’s already a lot of work but I’m loving every minutes of it, she’s perfect.

Thank you!!

[Catsamaze ADAA Volunteer in reply to nalia2020]

Hi Nalia. I would like to address one of the topics you mentioned....that of your new boyfriend. Just be yourself. You don’t have to practice it, you don’t have to figure out how to do it or whether you’re doing it right. Just be you. If this is going to work out it’s because he’s going to really like you just as you are.....not someone you think you should be. By the way, it’s a two-way street. It seems you are mainly worried about his opinion of how you present yourself but it goes the other way too. Do you like him for who he really is or do you want him to be someone else?

[nalia2020 in reply to Catsamaze]

Thank you for the reply! He is an amazing person and so far he’s been everything that I look for in a man. With my last boyfriend, there was a lot that I now realize I wasn’t really okay with and I would subconsciously try and change him or justify why it was okay when thinking now, it really really was not