I am going mad

[Whiskers16]

My thoughts just wont shut up, they are arguing in my head I feel like I’m going crazy.

I feel so alone like I’m the only person going through this. I am so scared.

[Grateful71]

Aw whiskers16, truly you are not alone. Everyone here has had days like this when your mind just won't settle and everything feels scary . I find it's like the wheel of a bike that just won't stop. Do whatever you can to relax or if distractions help then do that until you feel a bit better and realise it's just thoughts. We are all with you 🤗

[Whiskers16 in reply to Grateful71]

Thank you I’m am trying but each day seems to be getting worse. It’s nit just one day It’s been going on for months

[Grateful71 in reply to Whiskers16]

I know , it would be fine if it just lasted a day but it can take a while to find the best way to manage the anxiety. Have you spoken to anyone about how you are feeling? X

[Whiskers16 in reply to Grateful71]

I have spoken to my doctor and have talking Therapy once a week. I try and practice what she tells me.But can’t talk to my 18yr old daughter about it it’s nit fair.

[Grateful71 in reply to Whiskers16]

I have a 15 year old and a 17 year old and have spoken to both you of them about how I feel. Not too much , not offloading just gently explaining that sometimes I can feel down and worried but I'm working with it and they don't need to worry about me. Both said they appreciated knowing otherwise my moods were confusing and they thought it was them or that I was angry with their dad...which I'm not I'm grateful to have a really supportive husband X

[Whiskers16 in reply to Grateful71]

She does know I’m not ok but she doesn’t know how bad.My anxiety is caused by my relationship as her dad can’t handle the anxiety, he said it’s bringing him down.

My daughter doesn’t know yet but we will be separating after Xmas it’s all just an act at the moment.

[Downandout123 in reply to Whiskers16]

Hi Whiskers,Just wondering-do you think you will feel any better at all after the separation?

[Whiskers16 in reply to Downandout123]

It’s really long story and my therapist seems to think so but I will have a lot of hurdles to cross such as selling the house so could do with being stronger to deal with these.Also I need to get well to go back to work

[Downandout123 in reply to Whiskers16]

That's a lot to go through. I'm sorry.😔

[Whiskers16 in reply to Downandout123]

Thank you

[Downandout123 in reply to Whiskers16]

You're welcome

[goldieoldie in reply to Whiskers16]

remember its best to talk to her as an adult and prepare them for future anxieties otherwise it will rub off on them-you just cant hide it altogether--as much as you would like to.!!

[Whiskers16 in reply to goldieoldie]

She does know some but there’s other things going on at home which is causing the anxiety that she doesn’t know about as trying to get Xmas over.

[goldieoldie in reply to Whiskers16]

I can understand that,and its a difficult situation,anyway try to take it slowly we are always here for you.

[Whiskers16 in reply to goldieoldie]

Thank you

[goldieoldie in reply to Whiskers16]

your welcome.

[venusofthenorth]

What are you freaking out about?

[Whiskers16 in reply to venusofthenorth]

I’m afraid these symptoms of anxiety will ever go away. Usually the mornings are the worst but yesterday it was nearly all day until I gave in and took a diazepam

[Tillymay in reply to Whiskers16]

If you need your diazepam,you take it don’t sit and suffer.we are all here for you! Don’t you feel alone,people on here really do care sending big hugs.open up to what your scared of I’m more than sure someone on here has been through the same as you or is going through it.They Might be able to put some light on your situation.xxxsending hugs and love your way xxx

[venusofthenorth in reply to Tillymay]

You're not entirely correct. Anxiety is a subversion of learning and our brains have terrible methods of dealing with threats and stress. Medical treatments traditionally function much like alcohol or procrastination, once they wear off you're left with twice the trouble you had before taking them. Medical treatments are necessary when a) levels of anxiety are abnormally harmful to a sufferer b) the brain fails to manage levels of anxiety normally c) temporarily in extreme situations. Unless absolutely necessary, medical treatments are to be limited to proper, precise and necessary treatment strategies to people who very much require the dose (not everyone does and there's nothing offensive or harmful in pointing that out).

[Tillymay in reply to venusofthenorth]

As far as I’m aware she hasn’t taken her diazepam.so that’s why I told her to take it.Im only on here to make people feel better.and be there when they are feeling lowIm far from a doctor or therapist.I also know the affects of alcohol as my brother is an alcoholic.So I’m fully aware that medication and alcohol will not fix the problem.But I do feel if you have been given meds and you need to take them.Then do.please don’t judge what I’ve wrote as I’m only trying to help!

[venusofthenorth in reply to Tillymay]

I understand, but misinformation isn't helping. Not all medicines are prescribed correctly, especially not anxiety treatments.

[Tillymay in reply to venusofthenorth]

Don’t think I would call it misinformation! Her doctor has gave them.And they work for her.After all he is the professional.I know sometimes it’s trial and error with medication and takes some people along time to get the right one for them.and the right dose.So I’m afraid I think we will have to agree to disagree on this one.

[venusofthenorth in reply to Tillymay]

Doctors are NOT always correct. Doctors are people too and doctors fail, misjudge and make mistakes. Anxiety isn't a disease and shouldn't be treated like such.

[Tillymay in reply to venusofthenorth]

I know it’s not a disease! I’ve lived with it 20 plus years.Ive had some really good meds along the way.That have really helped.Also if it wasn’t for doctors half of us wouldn’t be here.You need to find a good doctor that understands your needs.I would rather take notice of my doctor than the average person.I won’t sit and suffer I will take medication if I need it and it helps!Also yes doctors are people that have been fully trained in what they do.They don’t want to make us feel worse.They are there to help get people better.

[goldieoldie in reply to Tillymay]

Unfortuneatly,Gps can only go by symptoms and by what you say,my concern is too many people are turned away or they change meds if ones not working and in my case ,after I had to change to another practisebecause of being nearer ---and Gp reduced my diazapam----and would have given me any tablets other than them-and they are not always right ,they dont like to give out diazapam as they are habit forming-and my habit carried on for 40yrs---------and learning slowly to break this need for that small amount of diazapam------very difficult !spoke about this quite a lot when I first joined HUA and its helped me understand better how others cope---Im more stressed than anything ,but anxiety is always there-----im much older now and understand the relationship between taken a half rather than the full 2mg---but its learning that counts ---and im not the perfect candidate as Im too dependent still.!!!

[Whiskers16 in reply to goldieoldie]

I really try and hold out as long as I can but I’m going through some really tough things in my life at the moment which is causing the anxiety.I sometimes just want a little bit of relief from the physical symptoms.

[goldieoldie in reply to Whiskers16]

Me tooWhiskers,I can honestly say,swear on the bible even that physical symptoms,drive one insane -I find a good talk,whatever something soothing that can ease this horrible physical discomfort!!!

[Whiskers16 in reply to goldieoldie]

I’m sitting here with tingling arms, fuzzy head trying to do what they say and accept it, but it’s all I can think about.

[venusofthenorth in reply to Whiskers16]

Anxiety is a common, normal feeling everybody gets occasionally, some more than others. You're not sick or abnormal for having anxiety, but it's necessary for you to conclude where those feelings are coming from.

[goldieoldie in reply to venusofthenorth]

I can conclude that being a sufferer for almost 50years,it is in my case inherent of my personality disorder,mild but it stems from childhod and several traumatic experiences of a sexual nature ,and is considered a handicap rather than a mental disturbance ---learning1, emotional intelligence works in my favour though cant overcome breathing technique-which anyone who si=uffers Anxiety should learn-hoping this helps!

[Beevee]

The best way to quieten the mind is to accept the thoughts, let them come, let them have their say, observe the content and then let them go. It is your resistance to them that keeps them coming. It is just anxious energy being released and the mind and body’s way of healing but sufferers keep themselves stuck in the cycle by fighting those thoughts and feelings instead of learning to accept them. That anxious energy needs to be released and allowing it all to happen and not doing anything to change things is the key to recovery. The symptoms you describe are very common amongst anxiety sufferers and completely harmless. You are NOT going mad. It’s just anxiety making you think and feel you are losing it but you are not. Give up trying to control it, let it do it’s thing and it will gradually lose its power to shock and disappear.

Best wishes

Beevee ❤️

[Whiskers16 in reply to Beevee]

Everyone tells me this and I keep trying to to do this, I have sentences that my therapist gave me which I repeat but it’s so hard when you are feeling like this.

[goldieoldie in reply to Beevee]

well described,and its acceptance of the feelings!Dr.Claire Weekes words-!

[Beevee]

During my journey to recovery, one of the most important things I learnt was to stop doing anything to try and deliberately change how I was thinking and feeling because it meant I wasn’t fully accepting. Acceptance is the foundation to full recovery.

Also, acceptance isn’t something you try. It is all about developing a different attitude towards the symptoms which can take time. Accepting the symptoms , feeling it all willingly instead of tying to avoid, suppress or push them away. It’s about being ok about not feeling ok. Similar to when you have a bad cold. You feel lousy, you resign yourself to feeling rough for a few days and let nature take its course. Gradually you start to feel better. You don’t sit up and worry all day/ night about how you are feeling, you just get on with things as best you can, despite it all. Dealing with anxiety is exactly the same.

[Whiskers16 in reply to Beevee]

Please don’t take this the wrong way but You make it sound easy but I can’t work out how to do this especially as I have other problems going on in my life which I am trying to deal with.It’s the physical symptoms I struggle with

[Beevee]

Ha ha! It isn’t easy but neither is it impossible. Like I said, it takes time to learn to accept and to get to that stage, it is important that you understand how anxiety plays tricks on the mind and body.

I bought Essential Help for your Nerves by Dr Claire Weekes which gave me the knowledge, understanding and tools to overcome the disorder.

Obviously I don’t know your personal circumstances but do know that anxiety can and does magnify problems, making mountains out of molehills. It is the master of creating fears and physical symptoms that wouldn’t exist if you didn’t have anxiety. It’s all one big bluff but to see through that veil and see it for what it really is ( a confidence trick) you have to feel it all willingly.

[Whiskers16 in reply to Beevee]

I did buy a Claire Weekes book but it really frightened me as I convinced myself I am having a breakdown after reading it.

[Beevee in reply to Whiskers16]

That's just your anxiety talking. I felt the same way.

Your anxiety has probably managed to convince you about alot of things, all of which simply wouldn't be there when you are not anxious. I've been there. It is just the feelings of fear and the natural human reaction is to run away from fear instead if facing it. The book explains the difference between anxiety and nervous breakdown and to be honest, there isnt alot of difference between the two and simply boils down to how much your nerves have been sensitised due to the amount of stress you have been putting yourself under. There are varying degrees but this does not matter one jot because the way to recovery is the same, no matter how much you have been suffering or for how long. Recovery is waiting to happen and that book explains what you neex to do ( or not do) to recover and be free of inappropriate levels of anxiety.

It's all fear based so the way to overcome anxiety is to face those fears which include the symptoms of fear, whether they be anxious thoughts or physical symptoms.

I was convinced I was riddled with cancer and went for all sorts of tests. Symptoms included bowel problems, blurred vision, lump in throat to name but 3. It was all anxiety and because I had anxiety, I had anxious thoughts and gave them far too much respect. I believed those thoughts (doom and gloom) which stressed me out even more, producing yet more symptoms I was trying to get rid of!

I learned to let myself fall into any state and do nothing to change any of it. I accepted everything that anxiety could throw at me. Yes, it was a rough ride for a while but the symptoms slowly vanished. To recover, you have to think and feel it all and not do anything to change it. The mind and body will sort itself out.

[Isinatra in reply to Beevee]

I’m glad your program worked for you.❤️🏄‍♀️

[Whiskers16]

I have accepted that it is all anxiety, I realise all the symptoms are to do with the flight or fight But how do you put up with it, day after day, month after month