Trying to find motivation to keep going

[Lycholko]

Lately, my house hasn't been a good place for me. My sister won't talk to my dad, my other sister is, well, annoying in her own way. She feeds off of toxic positivity, diagnosed herself with anxiety and is trying to get medication, and she is a bit of an anti-masker. Meanwhile, my dad keeps saying things to me like, “I would tell (my sister) this but she doesn't talk to me...” all the time. It is making me very depressed. I have tried telling my parents that I am depressed in the past, but they treated it like it was nothing. I keep thinking about when I move out. I understand it is hard to live on your own, but I would rather live alone than with my family. I have no motivation to go to school, do homework, clean my room, eat healthy, exercise, or even try to fix my insomnia. It has gotten worse over the past few days. I also think my friends hate me because I was trying to organize a movie night and I feel like I was being controlling. It really wasn't that bad, but I still think I'm a bad friend. It has been almost two weeks since my last therapist appointment and it has been the longest two weeks of my life. I've been trying to look at the good small things in my life, mostly that I was going to eat good food like coffee ice cream. However, there are only trace amounts of good things in my life right now. I'm mentally exhausted. I am tired of trying to be a "good person" by trying to fix my family's problems by myself. I just want them to leave me alone and sort it out themselves.

[Reading_Rando]

We all have the right to do what we have to do to try and survive (physically and emotionally) and be ok with ourselves. Dont beat yourself up for trying to do something to make yourself feel better and dont blame yourself for other people's stupidity. When someone else doesnt take your feelings or thoughts seriously that's on them, not you. I also want to say that you cant help anyone who doesnt want to be helped, sadly. Lastly, your a normal person reacting in a normal way to a bad situation. You deserve to feel good about yourself no matter what anyone else does or tells you.