Perfectly Useful Anxiety Management Tactic

[venusofthenorth]

Last year I suffered from a major depression and possibly the worst bouts of anxiety I've ever had. Traditionally I haven't been the guy with the panic attacks and the fearfulness, I've been known to be quite beyond ballsy and rather... possibly a tad offensive at times. Last year was different because a lot of major changes happened and for a time I had neither any way to support myself or food in my fridge, forcing me to feed off of friends and family for much longer than I anticipated.

Alongside treatment a physiotherapist grabbed my case. My therapist is a bit eccentric himself and found me fascinating given my less than traditional expression of autism and expression. I'm writing this because he really did help and he taught me how to deal with anxiety successfully and I've seen way too many posts on the topic of anxiety as of late. Not saying anxiety isn't a problem or that your anxiety in particular is ridiculous, I'm just describing a method that still works for me a year later.

What my therapist described was that anxiety is a sub-category of fear and that it's just one of the shitty ways brains process information. Anxiety and fear alongside a lot of other nasty emotions are really there to help us as individuals, they're just terrible at their job. We have anxiety and panic attacks when we anticipate danger but the problem of anxiety circulates harmless instances (embarrassment, an argument, unidentified smells, changes in appearance, we know them I think).

I'm not saying our anxieties aren't real. I'm not saying people don't have a reason to be fearful or anxious. What me and my therapist discovered was only that all of these feelings could be put in our favor rather than encaging us all in bed.

Now to the method;

1. Identify anxiety

2. Trace back the trigger

3. Deal with the trigger

4. Accept your feelings and move on with your life.

Example; I received a message from my boss she wanted me to come in early for a meeting. I didn't know if it was a good meeting or a bad meeting since I've had nasty meeting with employers before. Rather than panic, escape or not respond at all, I messaged her right back and explained my reaction up front.

"Hi! Has something happened? Do I have anything to worry about?"

30 minutes after that she responded there was nothing to worry about at all. Turns out she really just wanted to offer me a moment to speak with her directly about my work-life situation. It was great and I looked forward to the meeting having asked her to reassure me rather than jump to conclusions.

I'm not saying this will work for everyone. Not saying it's a cure. But it works for me and I'm offering it to you.

[Daesin]

The direct approach. I like it. Not all personalities can approach with such a manner . I'm glad it works for you and I hope a lot of the other readers are able to utilize this very useful tool.

Thank you so much for sharing with us.

Blessings to all.

[BluePeppermint]

Thank you for sharing. My work is my trigger. I started a new job about a year and a half ago and didn't receive the training I needed. Then one of the attorneys I work for got really upset with something she didn't think I did well. Then it got worse. Some of my work was being farmed out to other people, with no explanation to me. So now the thought of returning to the office causes me a great deal of panic. Guess I should try out your method, but I'm not sure how to get passed it. I have another week off and then I am supposed to return.

[venusofthenorth in reply to BluePeppermint]

Let me do this. I'll send you a private message (I have a lot of administrative experience and a bit of experience doing office work) and I'll ask you to elaborate. I'm not doing so to put my nose where it doesn't belong. I'm not doing this to put your firm in trouble. I hear you, I recognize the pain and I'd like to hear you out so you may vent to someone on the matter while I try to come up with possible solutions. Been there, done that and would love to see if I can be of assistance.

[sophie4]

Absolutely fantastic post that I truly appreciate!!!!