I feel so ashamed of myself - Anxiety and Depre...

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I feel so ashamed of myself

Hb2003
Hb2003

Hello by the way i am not looking for dates i am a muslim girl and in my religion not allowed to do that also please dont just judge someone because they are asking how was someone’s day I apologize in. Advance if any of my comments went the wrong way

80 Replies
oldestnewest

Hey, what happened? You okay?

I’m ok just a little bit eh i asked if someone was alright and people think that I’m asking for dating or something which i am not just wanted to give support thats all

Oh, I see. Are you doing this via private message? (No problem if you are; I'm just asking so I can get more info).

No not at all

Oh, okay. Hmm...we have two moderators for this site, whose job it is to ensure everyone feels safe. Do you feel unsafe in anyway? Is anyone bothering you? This feeling of unsafety has unfortunately happened to me and others in the past, so please don't hesitate to say something. You can message me if more comfortable.

Lilly, can you let me know what you're thinking? You are safe. They cannot get to you. I understand that you still feel uncomfortable, though.

I feel safe but i am uncomfortable

Hb2003
Hb2003 in reply to Hb2003

Sorry if I didn’t reply fast

No doubt you feel unsafe! I'm trying to think of what to say, hence the pause.

mollykay70
mollykay70 in reply to Hb2003

Don’t be discouraged by that Liily40. I see you on here reaching out to lots of people and being very supportive. To me included. You have nothing to worry about.

She's a very respectful young lady and 2 older ladies passed judgement on both of us

What happened?

I basically asked someone if he was alright I was concerned and worried and then people were saying that this is not a dating site And that underage girls like older men 😞 😤

Luna_Child
Luna_Child in reply to Hb2003

Lilly you were very supportive and kind

You shouldn't feel embarrassed by these other 2 ladies who passed judgement.

You didn't do anything wrong lilly

Hb2003
Hb2003 in reply to Luna_Child

Your right I didn’t do anything wrong but I’m afraid that they are going to keep on attacking me

Luna_Child
Luna_Child in reply to Hb2003

They will not because they can be reported if they do.

Jakki-82
Jakki-82 in reply to Hb2003

Hi Lilly, never mind the negative comments. You're just trying to reach out and help someone. The rest of us understand that.

:)

We were on catman 22 sight responding and 2 older ladies accused us of looking for dates. I responded to them.

Lilly is muslim 16 and not allowed to date in her religion and she feels em arrassed.

Lilly is a very sweet respectful young lady.

I suggest maybe people just go to the site and read

Thanks minniemouse

Luna Child

Oh dear...

I'm trying to find the words to say what I want, but I can't. I'm just so awfully sorry.

I didn’t really think that it would come to this i was just being kind and being concerned thats all

Of course you were! I am very sorry you were put through that. Since Luna appears to know what's going on (thanks, Luna), I'm assuming she's told you about the report option on the bottom of each reply?

This is used quite frequently, to tell you the truth.

I am going to report but i feel like thy would attack me if I reported there comments but whatever they deserve it

Oh, dear...

Thinking

Awhile back and before you got here, admin made a post about ways to keep unnecessary drama away from here (or something of that nature). They did this after the forum had received blowups from people who had been told beforehand that they were going to be reported and subsequently got angry about it. One of the things admin told us to do was to just press the report button. Don't tell the person that you're going to report them, but just do it. I learned this the hard way, so don't feel bad at all..

Since we are telling you here that you can report them, we can only hope that they don't come after you. If they do, it will probably be through the private messaging system (trust me on this one; it's happened to me). If this is the case, you just report and mute (meaning that they can no longer message with you) (both options are available on pm).

If this happens on here in the future (which I sure hope it does not,) please don't hesitate to use that report button.

I'm so very sorry, Lilly

I’m going to be ok 😊

Great to hear! I need to go to bed now, so "see" you on here tomorrow.

See you tomorrow i will be available at 12:50 PSAT is tomorrow for me wish me luck 😊

It’s ok it happens

Agora1
Agora1 in reply to Hb2003

Lilly, I am sorry this happened to you. I am glad that you spoke up about it.

It is not acceptable behavior. This is to be your safe place to come to.

I can only assume it was done by Personal Message. No one should have to

feel a shame or apologize for innocent caring you showed to another person.

Stay safe Lilly, we watch over our young people. :) xx

Luna_Child
Luna_Child in reply to Agora1

Yes we definitely do

Hi, Agora. She says it wasn't through the messaging system. I'm a bit concerned. Yes, it's happened through that before, but if it's now happening on here and not taken notice of by admin, that's a real concern.

It's on Catman22 site under Ladies. This woman Goldieoldie us planning on apologizing to you today. If it's private messaging don't delete

? I'm confused. Why apologize to me?

Seriously, though, I really appreciate the head's up😊😊😊

Oh I was saying that Goldieoldie was going to apologize to Lilly and instead I put you by mistake.

I thought that's what happened. No sweat! I'm glad she's going to get an apology!

Lilly you are a very respectful young lady. Those other ladies were not respectful toward us. They assumed something they should not have. You're very kind

Hb2003
Hb2003 in reply to Luna_Child

Thanks a lot 😊

Luna_Child
Luna_Child in reply to Hb2003

You're welcome

Lily I wasn’t in on that conversation, just reading about what happened in the responses.

I think you have been very supportive and thoughtful and I have enjoyed chatting with you! I’m sorry someone gave you a hard time today! Don’t feel bad about asking someone how they are doing.

I hope you are feeling better!

Hb2003
Hb2003 in reply to Phil-4-13

Thanks i am feeling better but just a bit furious to be honest thanks for your kindness and support

Phil-4-13
Phil-4-13 in reply to Hb2003

Antime

Phil-4-13
Phil-4-13 in reply to Phil-4-13

Anytime

Hb2003
Hb2003 in reply to Phil-4-13

I really hate it when people think that i am asking for a date i mean come on I’m here to support people and be kind not do. That stuff

Hb2003
Hb2003 in reply to Phil-4-13

I just get very anxious when these things happen I always think did i do something wrong ?

I know what you mean. Of course you aren’t here for that. The sort of people who would automatically jump to such a conclusion are schmucks and not worth your consideration.

Try to be like a duck... water off a duck’s back! 🙂

Hb2003
Hb2003 in reply to Phil-4-13

😂😂 i giggle thinking about that that is such a good analogy

I feel way much better i am just super stressed because also felt super sick Today i couldn’t do anything most of the day

I just layed down i also cried because I was worried about my health

Phil-4-13
Phil-4-13 in reply to Hb2003

I hope you have a better day tomorrow! Take care of yourself. ❤️

I am trying to because i have a PSAT tomorrow 😕🙁😄

Good luck!! I'm glad you're doing better.

(yeah, I know, I'm going, I'm going... (laughter face -- they've got to get an emoji system going for laptops. I feel naked here!) )

Good night!

Good night 😂😊

Glad to be of service to you! (yeah, I REALLY need to go)

Glad I could make you laugh!

You made me chuckle and grin 😊😂😂

Hi it’s Shnookie. I have seen your posts and

U have a pure heart ❤️. I’m 62 definitely

an OLDER woman and have not seein U

coming on to anyone. I send people

Hugs 🤗 when I thank them 4 their support. Fortunately no one has

complained about the hugs 🤗. If this happens, I will stop Doing this.

Hope the PSAT went well 4!U.

Hugs 🤗 Shnookie

Hi Lilly40,

I've read your posts and all the replies to "I feel So Ashamed of Myself".

I am so very sorry you had this unfortunate interchange with the two ladies.

This is rare as the majority of people who are members of this Forum are gentle, kind and supportive...JUST LIKE YOU ARE!!!

There is absolutely NOTHING for you to be ashamed of, Lilly. You did NOT do anything even slightly wrong.

You seem to be a respectful, kind, supportive and non-judgmental young woman.

You are safe here, Lilly. Please know this and feel comfortable sharing whatever you choose.

Again, I'm very sorry you had this sad experience.

I have not been part of the previous postings but based on what you have written about your encounter, the women sound like they were out of line and were jumping to unwarranted conclusions.

If you are feeling harrassed, please contact the moderator and explain the situation to have it addressed. We are glad you are here. It sounds like your brother's conditions can be scary and unpredictable. It is often harder being a close family member than the person with the health problems.

Take care.

Hb2003
Hb2003 in reply to dmt1121

Thanks a lot guys i am thankfully better than 2 days ago i ate and thankfully am not feeling nauseous wish me luck for the PSAT

Hi again. I see Admin14 has entered the conversation. I'm so glad! Thanks Admin!

I am just checking in. I'm glad I got to you before you go in for your PSAT. Good luck!! Remember to breathe (no joke; my yoga instructor has said that we tend to "forget" to breathe when stressed). You'll do great!

If you get nervous during it, do breathing exercises (quietly, of course). I can hear to now: the big OHM and whooshing sounds reverberating through the room. Also, imagining the proctor in his underwear sometimes comes in handy to :)

😊😂😂😂 you get me everytime

Sweet!

😂😂 can you please private message me something funny every day 😂😂

I don't want to commit to anything, so how about just on here, okay?

Ok sorry 😊

No problem😊

Luna_Child
Luna_Child in reply to dmt1121

Thank you. I was with Lilly when these ladies replied.

Please don't be ashamed, you did nothing wrong.

Admin14
Admin14Administrator

Note: Reports of Abuse are anonymous and can be made at any time by any member. If you are unsure of how to use this function or prefer to contact an admin directly you may ask questions or message directly through the messaging function. Posts are not monitored in real time (that simply isn't possible given the number of posts/comments each day) so if problematic content is not reported the admins cannot deal with it.

Good morning Lilly,

I was reading through the conversation here. I just want to encourage you, that we are all here to encourage, help, and support you in the best way that we can. I know that you have said nothing to protect yourself, I have a pretty good idea what might be going on in your life. Because of a few things that you had mentioned. I want to give you some hope and help... I have had a time or two in my life where I have felt ashamed of myself too. We are a community here, we have all experienced some kind of feeling ashamed of ourselves, depression, anxiety, guilt...You are not alone! You are a strong person, keep putting one foot in front of the other. - If this happens to be an absolute emergency, please do not be afraid to call or text these hotlines. They are here to give you the appropriate help right away. National Domestic Violence Hotline; 180079972233 - Emergency; 911- National Suicide Hotline; 18002738255 or text HOMETO741741.

Remember we are all here for you! There is no judging here. You are very important and valued here. You are going to make it through!

Good morning lilly40,

I struggle with shame like almost all the time.

For me, it took facing those fears that would hold me in shame.

The positive thing about doing that for myself is I didn’t have to tell anyone about it. I just acted and confronted all those things. I also had a lack of actually have a lack of trust in others.

There was something a lot of people would tell me that just seemed so foreign to me in the past. And that was do things for you. To me, it simply means people are going to do what people are going to do.

There’s another thing to that which I’m glad I caught, and this might just be a personal thing. People check people. By that I mean, as I had or have a lack of trust, I can’t forget I’m not the only one with that problem. It’s not necessarily wrong or right to test a persons character. Sometimes a person would or will prove the others right and things cannot will do some way and with that in mind, I found myself to blame and everyone else gone. Could they be in shame now?

I think there’s a cycle lol it seems like hahaha I lost my train of thought 😂😂😂

Point being, have fun with yourself and life. Don’t let things that have no importance affect you poorly. Things move on and things change, constantly and endlessly. Make space for the things you care about and that matter to you. Dump the crap.

Love ya and stay safe and strong. You can do it :) take care best wishes

How'd the PSAT go??

Wonderful

I feel so much relief

That's great! I'm glad it went well!👍👍

Thanks 😊

How is asking, "How is your day?" flirting??? At this point, saying "hi" is flirting.😒 What's wrong with people these days?!?! I MuST fLirT a LOt ThEn!🤓 (insert any dumb cartoon laugh you can think of)

In all seriousness, this is a really annoying thing to go through.

Hb2003
Hb2003 in reply to JenesisINFP

😂😂👾

Im glad you are feeling better

Hb2003
Hb2003 in reply to DJB74

Thanks

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