How do I help my teen deal with her depression?

[Purplemonkey6]

How do I help my teen deal with her depression? She is in therapy, on medication and it doesn’t seem to be getting better. It’s breaking my heart to see her like this.

[Hidden]

It is a very difficult situation for parents to watch their children be in pain. My parents had (and still have) to watch me live with depression (and suicide attempts). For me, on some level it has always been a comfort just knowing that my parents are there for me, no matter what. They're always there to provide support and assistance when things get really rough and I know I can't handle what's happening on my own.

It's difficult to hear, but you won't be able to fix it for your daughter. She's going to have to go through all of it and find her own way. Just occasionally reassure her that you will always be there no matter what and when.

There are a lot of resources out there for family members who have a loved one that's living with depression... if you haven't already, check out the websites for NAMI, AFSP, Mental Health Association, and nowmattersnow.org. They have resources that can provide some guidance.

Please feel free to reach out at anytime with any questions. I'm happy to provide whatever input I can from a child's perspective.

[BlueLlama]

I’m no longer a teen, but I struggle with my dad not knowing how to help. Last week I had a bit of a meltdown and a long overdue talk with him.

He always tries to help me how he would want someone to help him. But that doesn’t work for me. Sometimes I want to try it on my own, but have him there if I end up needing help. I explained that it’s better for me when he says “is there any way I can help” rather than “let me help you”. It’s been really difficult because I know he wants to help, but he just doesn’t know how. And I don’t know what would be helpful. But I do know that it makes me feel defensive and insulted when he just assumes I need help.

Another thought is that it might not be the right therapist or the right type of therapy. I saw a counselor when I was 17, and it messed me up. I swore off of counselors for ten years. This summer I started seeing a new counselor, and he’s amazing. He really helps.

Whatever happens, I hope you both feel better. My heart goes out to you both. 💙💚

[Hidden]

When I was a teen my dad especially didn't know how to deal with me and my emotions. I was very depressed and needed the support, but I didn't really get that. It was hard and something I still remember to this day (I'm 39).

Be a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on. Let her know that it's okay to feel whatever it is she feels. Let her know that all her emotions are acceptable. Let her know that you will be there to support her no matter what. Above all, let her know that she is loved and that she is a good person no matter what!

[lovetodance2018]

Thank you for reaching out. Depression is such a frustrating illness for both the person struggling and for loved ones around them who care and feel helpless. Understanding Depression is a disease and not something a person can control is important. It is great that you have her on medication and getting help. It is important your teen feels comfortable with her counselor. How long has she been on medication and in counseling? It takes a while to see improvement from the medication and counseling. Finding the right medication and dosage is the first step. Here is an article (mayocl.in/31uTRm3) that might give you more insight on this. Continue to be there for your teen, tell her how much you care, and are there for her. Just knowing she has love and support is very important. Depression is an illness that can be treated but it takes time. Also, if she can feel comfortable sharing on this support forum or ones for teens that is also helpful. I found one for teens that you might want to look into (bit.ly/3olBo5p). Knowing there are others who struggle with depression and you are not alone is a huge support when a person struggles with depression. I will be praying for you. Hugs and God Bless

[lovetodance2018]

How are things going with your teen this week? I have been praying for you. Hugs

[Mimi1957]

I realize this was posted 5 months ago. I am new to this site. In case you still have a need, or anyone else for that matter. There are virtual support groups for teens. An adult facilitator will attend and if that person is a Peer Recovery Support specialist the cost, if any, will be minimal. Teens are good at helping each other cope. These groups should have the same confidentiality agreements as in-person groups. There can be a topic of the week but the teens choose what they need to talk about. If there isn't one in your area or with your local Community Services Board, you can always look into starting on up yourself. Just be sure you have guidance from a mental health provider first.

Also, because everything is still virtual, you may be able to apply for a grant and kids from near and far could benefit. There just isn't enough affordable support for our teens out there yet.

best to you and your child.