Just need to vent, really struggling!

[Bookmama20]

Long story short I have had depression moat of my life,along with anxiety. Anxiety was diagnosed about 4 years ago. Just recently diagnosed with PTSD. This past year my anxiety and depression has been bad. I was off my meds, due to no insurance. Got back on the anxiety in July, but also began having some possible heart issues. Since July 15. Been out of work(with no pay) because of it since August 2nd. I recently went for an Echo which was fine and a stress test last week which came back positive. Was scheduled for a catherization on Oct 21st. But on Monday I began having some chest pressure and was told to go to ER. No heart attack, everything looked good but because of everything they did the procedure on Tuesday morning. So I spent the night in the ER on Monday. Because of Covid, nobody is allowed in with you, so here I am,worried sick and my catastrophic thinking just spinning wheels. I cried off an on the whole time I was there. Have been crying ever since. They said there was no blockage and everything looked good and sent me home. Had a little pressure tonight but now startting to think it could be my anxiety. Have never had chest pressure before and my anxiety has been bad before.

I am just struggling right now. Can seem to shake this panicked feeling, the weepiness. I just need someone( my Dr) to say all is well. I have been in this constant fear mode since July 15. I think it is finally catching up and taking it's toll. I'm worried about all thia health stuff, the bills, having only one income right now, I feel like I have added stress to my family both financially and emotionally. I am just a mess.

I am working with a therapist, and have an appointment with a psychiatric nurse to manage my medication. But that isn't until Oct 22.

I hate feeling like this. It's scary,not fun, and I just feel like I am spiraling. I have tried to talk to my husband and as much as he tries to understand I don't know how to communicate in words how I am feeling. I feel very,very overwhelmed right now. I honestly don't know how much more I can take. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

[Agora1]

Hi Bookmama20, I'm not surprised that your anxiety is spiraling out of control with all that has been going on in your life. You are carrying a lot of weight on your shoulders which I think may have produced some of the physical symptoms you have been experiencing.

After all, that stress needs to go somewhere.

The positive side of it all is that you have had all the major testing done for your heart and they came back with everything being okay. Your concerns and doubt have to do with your chest pressure. But you need to assure yourself that it may very well be coming from anxiety and nothing more. Anxiety can cause chest pressure for several reasons. One of them being hyperventilation because of your fear which makes the chest feel tight. Another reason can be coming from the Brain/Gut interconnection which can cause chest

tightness from overproduction of stomach acids and GERDS. And last but not least could

be coming from frequent swallowing of AIR due to your nervousness causing bloating and pressure.

Until you are able to settle your mind down some, your muscles and nervous system will

continue to stay in overdrive. Right now, with your clean bill of heart health, it's time for

you to work on your emotional issues. Can worry pay the bills, get you a job any faster??

Worrying won't add another day to your wellbeing until you accept that you are going to be okay. I would recommend Meditation and Diaphragmatic Breathing techniques.

I do these 3 times a day, every day of my life. It will not only calm the Body but the Mind as well. When life comes along with problems, you will be able to handle it without the subsequent physical symptoms. I'm glad you are here on this amazing forum. We can help

you feel so not alone. We can walk the walk with you on this journey. Bookmama, I'm so glad you are with us. xx

[Bookmama20 in reply to Agora1]

Thank you so much. I thought I had a pretty good handle on things until the health stuff started. I do have a job, but the state I work in doesn't have temporary disablity insurance. They are anxious for me to return and are holding my job. They've been great.

I have been working on my coping skills,and have done the breathing thing. I have also tried meditation. I found a couple that work for me. I have just been so overwhelmed I haven't been able to settle myself to do it. I tried one earlier Tonight outside under the moon, but kept crying through it. So didn't work as well this time. Lol

I plan on talking with my Primary Dr when I see her Wed, maybe ahe can put some of my fear to rest. Glad I found this page. Thank you for rssponding and being so kind. I apprdciate it.