I struggle with anxiety and depression. Recently people have been telling me to find a way to cope with my emotions. I get lonely really easily, and I always feel the urge to have to talk to someone. I guess I just want to be able to be okay when I'm alone.
Struggling With Depression; Looking F... - Anxiety and Depre...
Struggling With Depression; Looking For Hope
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53 Replies
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Hi, I don't normally have depression, but this year is really giving me a crash course in it. I'm always up to talk, I sure need it from time to time myself as well.
Hang in there, a friend recently told me that just by reaching out I was doing something to better my situation. So I guess you are doing that as well.
in reply to jvdonkey2020
Hi! Thank you for reaching out! I've been told for a while that I need to reach out, and I've been scared of doing so. But recently, my depression got so bad that I didn't know what else to do. So I thought I would give this a try.
jvdonkey2020 in reply to
Same here. Have you been able to do anything at all for yourself today? I spoke to my niece for over an hour and I feel better (even though we just talked about her stressed life).
2020 sure makes things more difficult!!!
in reply to jvdonkey2020
Haha I totally get that! I've been doing schoolwork pretty much all day, as well as basically be my boyfriend's therapist. But other than that, unfortunately not.
jvdonkey2020 in reply to
I feel like sticking my head out the window and yelling for a few hours. I don't know if that would actually help or not, but it would at least make me feel something.
In the car is better.
in reply to jvdonkey2020
Yeah, I'm sure that would work to blow some steam off haha!
Welcome!
It is correct that you need to find a way to cope. Do you have a therapist?
in reply to
Hi! No, I do not have a therapist.
in reply to
Do your parents have any ideas on how to help?
in reply to
Whenever I say to my mom that I have depression, she thinks I'm lying and tells me to basically grow up. And my dad doesn't really know how to help; he has his own work-related stressors.
in reply to
I hear you about your dad. My depression was bad in my teen years. Fortunately my mom understood because my dad sure didn't. I can't imagine what it's like having both parents not understand, so I'm sorry you're dealing with that. Would it be possible to go to your school consellor?
in reply to
Well because of the pandemic going on, my school counselors are only available for school-related issues I'm pretty sure. I could try it though.
in reply to
Very true. Worth an ask, though
in reply to
True. Thank you for the suggestions!
in reply to
You're welcome!😊
HeartLove2 in reply to
Please try. Our school counselors are still available. Our community has increased the number of Behavioral Health resources available. Just joining this community is a positive action!
in reply to HeartLove2
Yeah...I thought so too. Due to the pandemic, I only go to school once a week, and today is that day. So I'm going to give it a try.
Hi! I really like your username!
I get lonely really easily too. Don’t hesitate to send me a message if you’d ever like to chat 
in reply to jesca18
Hey there! Thanks for reaching out! My username is actually made up of two significant in my life. Sunkissed is the name of one of my favorite songs that my boyfriend told me that made him think of me, and pandas are my favorite animal lol. I'd be down to chat anytime! Just hit me up!
It's very important to reach out to others for support.
Keeping to yourself/isolating only compounds your suffering.
Find a support group of peers.
HeartLove2 in reply to
It's sad & true. When I get stuck, I repeat the mantra to myself: "tell someone" [what you're feeling]. Pick a friend, pick a stranger, pick an online community - do not keep it a secret. Please tell someone.
As a child, I watched my Mom struggle with depression for a long time / years; a toxic marriage to my narcissist dad caused her depression to worsen. I observed her support network dissolving around her as she self-isolated. So... later in my life after a few traumatic experiences, I am now also struggling with depression. When I get so sad and feel so isolated, I remember the healthy version of me and I tell myself to share my feelings. Call someone. Feelings matter.
There are tools to help you train / guide your thoughts. Oh, and virtual school takes all the fun out of the education, in my opinion. Therefore, try to create shared positive experiences with people who care about you. Love & hugs.
in reply to HeartLove2
KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK.
Whiskers16 in reply to
I find this really difficult to reach out to people I know as I don’t want To be a burden. I try and hide It from my partner as when I say I’m having a bad day he just doesn’t know how to deal with me and is finding me very needy.
Also I’m frightened if I tell them how bad I really feel someone is going to call 999.
I understand as if you’ve never suffered with anxiety you can’t have any idea how bad it can be.
in reply to Whiskers16
Hi there! First off, I just want to say that reaching out to people does not make you a burden. If someone reached out to you, I'm sure you probably would't see that as a burden. If someone is making you feel like a burden, then you should not let them do that. You are never a burden. Anything you have to say is always welcome. Don't be afraid to speak your mind.
It's okay to be afraid of sharing your thoughts. I cannot speak for other people, but I can speak for myself when I say that you can tell me anything, and I would not call the authorities on you. I am always here to listen, and will always try my best to help you with what you are going through.
If there's anything you wanted to talk about, don't be afraid to hit me up. I am always willing to talk about anything.
Whiskers16 in reply to
Thank you you lovely person. This morning I was in the house in my own and had a real meltdown, felt like there was no point in carrying on as the fear was so bad, and feel like it will never get better.
in reply to Whiskers16
I'm really sorry to hear that. I want to say that it is okay to be afraid of some things. Personally, I'm afraid of being alone in this world, because I feel like eventually, I'm going to mess something up, and my boyfriend will leave me, and my friends will stop caring. But in my opinion, having hope is what makes me remember that it can get better. I know that times are scary right now, and I know a lot of things seem uncertain. But having a little spark of hope, a little light in the darkness, is what could carry you through these tough times. Look for the positives, and let them guide you through those scary feelings. Know that you are loved, and you are never alone. There will always be people who care about you and who will hold your hand through anything. There is always a reason to keep going. No matter what or who it is, there will always be someone or something there waiting for you at the end of the dark tunnel. Reaching the light is the toughest part, but you are strong, and I know you can do it. We are here for you always. <3
in reply to Whiskers16
Just got off the phone with my therapist where I acknowledged despite the adverse pandemic currently transpiring throughout the world, it has given me the opportunity and/or window to view and reflect on all the vast work I've done over the past 40+ years via various modalities (eclectic) to move past surviving to thriving today. I would have never thought I might be in such good circumstances today in spite of such a deplorable childhood. I decided to be an active participant in my own life & recovery despite whatever adversity came along. I wasn't going to play an inactive role sitting in the 'back seat' of my life going nowhere.
I JUST GOT SICK & TIRED OF BEING SICK & TIRED and acknowledged early on that no one other than myself was going to get my ass in gear.
PERSEVERE !!!
in reply to
Amen! I am super happy for you!
Hello Sunkissed-Panda (love your name)..
Let me see..."find a way to cope with your emotions"...sounds very cold and unfeeling to me. Like, 'Man/woman Up' to whatever is messing with your emotions.
Your continual struggle with depression/anxiety is NOT something to be made light of...these feelings HURT...they hurt to your very core.
Feeling lonely and feeling lonely easily, as you phrased it, is horrendous...a sad, sad, depressive feeling that welcomes huge bouts of anxiety. I understand your need or urge to have someone to talk with. Are there many people around you who you can talk to? Do they listen? Understand?
When you are alone can you come up with some ideas that might help? May I offer a few suggestions?
Write lists. Lists of what you wish for...lists for what you want to do in the next few months...if you enjoy reading, lists of books you'd like to read...same with music...lists of your very favorite foods...lists of the special things you enjoy in nature, that is if nature is your thing. Lists of memories of enjoyable times in your life. Lists of your dreams and hopes...lists of things/people who you enjoy...can be movie or TV characters, shopkeepers...anything, anyone. I can continue throughout the few hours left of tonight, although it's .
Can you share with me some of he things you enjoy?
I'll be thinking of you.
sophie4
in reply to sophie4
Hi sophie4! Thank you so much for reaching out! Waking up to this comment already brightened my mood. To answer your first few questions, I don't have that many people I can talk to. My parents don't really understand how I feel (nor do they care that much), and most of my friends don't "feel like" taking the time to listen to how I'm feeling. The only person I know I can talk to is my boyfriend, but he isn't always around to listen because he has other things going on in his life.
Some of the things I enjoy are playing/listening to music, writing stories, biking, singing, reading, watching the TV show Arrow, and honestly, sleeping.
Thank you for thinking of me! It means the world to know someone out there even knows that I exist.
sophie4 in reply to
Oh do I ever love the creativity and beauty of the name 'Sunkissed_Panda...just wanted to tell you before this old lady forgot!!!!!!!!!! Oh my....(I'd use different wording but....)I take it Sunkissed is a group? Or is it a song...one of your faves...who sings it?
I have something (that's funny...how about a thousand things...I need to share with you...and everyone. I live with my sister who is very ill. She suffers with COPD and had back surgery about 8 years ago...not exactly sure when...that resulted in her SUIFFERING with 24/7 PAIN. She was doing OK but then they took her meds away and what she's taking just doesn't cut it. Anyhow, she is extremely demanding of me and when she says jump...you know, I say, OK!!! How high?
And at this very moment she's waiting for me but I wanted to say hello and thank you for following me. Did I get that right? I didn't know you could do this. Please tell me how.
I'm a bundle of nerves 'cause I'm sort of sneaking this to you. I will write later tonight or tomorrow.
There one thing I want to share with you right now...if I read (and remember) correctly, you mentioned that you're 16? Well, Sunkissed_Panda, your new friend here is a whopping 70!!!!!!!!!!! 8/27/1950. Thanks so very much for not writing me off as some oldster who knows too little about the music of today...many other things. 70 is not just a number. Trust me, I feel as though I'm 170!!! Too many traumas, losses, betrayals...and this list, unfortunately , continues. But I can share with you that I carry all my ages within me. And I respect and seem to love the younger population that, of course, includes teens.
You and I have so much in common!!!!!!!!!! I have to go...RIGHT THIS SECOND....who are some of your favorite authors? I adore reading.
Later, my friend. Sending you wishes for a gentle, sweet day.
Sophie4
in reply to sophie4
I'm super glad you like my name! Sunkissed is actually the name of a song by Khai Dreams. It's definitely one of my favorite songs; I'd highly recommend it! Also yeah, I did follow you. I was just so touched by what you wrote to me that I thought I would. If you click on a user's name or picture icon, that will lead you to their account page. Then, there is an option to follow the user. So that's what I did.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. That is super sweet and caring of you to be there for your sister. I know I would definitely do the same for a family member or close friend. I'm sorry to hear about what she is going through, but I am certain that you make her life that much better just by being in it.
To answer your question, some of my favorite authors include: Lois Lowry, Jay Asher, S.E. Hinton, Jennifer Nielson, and August Wilson. I'd have to say my favorite book series is definitely The Giver series, written by Lois Lowry.
I hope that you can find peace this afternoon/evening. It may not be easy, but trying to find peace within yourself and looking for the positives go a long way. I am always here to talk.
sophie4 in reply to
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sophie4 in reply to
I need help...in a horror-filled depression. I can't find any of your posts...especially the most recent about the Calculus test. And I can't find what I wrote to you...everything is disappearing...I feel as though I'm disappearing.
Please be kind and gentle with yourself. I need to share so much with you about the Calculus issue. When I can, You know I will.
in reply to sophie4
Hey there! You can totally message me on the chat whenever you feel like it. I am always here to talk (aside from, you know, when I'm asleep haha). It's likely just your computer being dumb and not loading everything it should be. Nothing is your fault here. I get it that technology is confusing. But I can guarantee you that you are not disappearing. My mom says a lot that the world would be way less crazy if computers were not a thing. And at the moment, I don't actually disagree. It's okay to not understand it. But you shouldn't stress yourself out over it too much. I am here for you. We are all here for you. And I will help you in any way I can. It will be okay, I promise. Just breathe a little<3
It's a sad truth that people who don't experience depression and anxiety disorder don't understand it. Being told to 'find a way to cope with your emotions' is like asking someone to find a new path out of the forest in the dark.
First, it's important for you to understand where your emotions are coming from. It sounds strange, but I've found in myself that the things that I think cause the problem, aren't always the real cause. A good counsellor can help you to untangle what's happening and help you to make sense of it. Once you do, THEN you can find techniques that can help you to manage situations that affect your emotions as they occur.
It's not always easy to find a counsellor (particularly at the moment), one of the techniques that I used in my counselling was CBT (Cognitive Behavioural therapy) there is plenty about it online, I also find Buddhism has some excellent ways of looking at life which has helped me when I wasn't seeing professionals (You don't have to be buddhist to follow the practices!)
Finally, keep talking to us. As you've already seen, we all have different view points. You don't need to accept everything we offer but something might resonate with you and help you to carve a fresh new path.
in reply to Cookie101
Thank you so much! I just joined this forum yesterday, and I've already learned a lot about how to deal with how I'm feeling. Obviously, it's not as simple as a flip of a switch. But just knowing that I have somewhere to come when I'm feeling down is relieving to me.
Hello, I struggle with anxiety and depression also and it is a true blessing when I have a day without feeling anxious or depressed.
I woke this morning earlier than i needed and just started pacing looking for something to do. I am at work now but still anxious and its difficult.
Hope you have a easy day
in reply to HD1960
Thank you so much! I'm sorry that you're feeling anxious at work; I'm feeling kinda down right now, and I'm honestly not sure why. I hope your day gets better though. Remember that you always have people to talk to that will listen and care.
Hi Sunkissed_Panda, I also love your name. I am glad you reached out here. You already have experienced how amazing the support is from everyone here. That is because we all understand the struggles with depression and anxiety. It is so helpful to be able to share and know there are others who understand and care. No matter what time of day, if you post someone, someone else will respond and be there for you. How long have you been struggling with depression? Have you ever seen a doctor for your depression? Depression is often a chemical imbalance that happens in our brains. Some need medication to get back to being balanced. Our thoughts can affect those chemicals too, but once they are off balanced medication seems to help. I noticed some of the responses mentioned seeing a counselor. Most schools have counselors designated to help students struggling with depression so you might want to check. It doesn't hurt to check. Lastly, a few things that have always helped me through my depressive episodes. One is to remind myself is depression is a illness, not who I am; depression is temporary, I will feel better; and give myself a break when I am struggling. Say uplifting things to myself, not put downs is so necessary. Being hard on ourselves only worsens the depression. I will be praying for you. Know you are not alone we are here for you. Talking things out is great and having this forum to do so is a blessing. Reach out anytime. Hugs and God Bless
in reply to lovetodance2018
Hi lovetodance2018! Thank you so much for reaching out! It's really comforting someone is thinking about me and actually cares. To answer your questions, I have been struggling with depression for about 2 years. And no, I have not seen a doctor because my mom doesn't believe me, and I have no way of getting to a doctor's office. And because I'm a minor, I haven't found any online doctors. Honestly though, I do sometimes put myself down and say mean things about myself because that's sort of where my mind goes. I find it hard to complement myself because when I look in the mirror, all I see is my flaws. I will try to be more positive though, since clearly that's a step in the right direction,
HD1960 in reply to
just say,
I AM BLESSED,PROSPEROUS,REDEEMED,FORGIVEN,TALENTED,CREATIVE,CONFIDENT,SECURE,DISIPLINED,FOCUSED,PREPARED,QUALIFIED,MOTIVATED,VALUABLE,FREE,DETERMINED,EQUIPPED,EMPOWERED,ANOINTED,ACCEPTED AND APPROVED, NOT AVERAGE,NOT MEDIOCRE, I AM A CHILD OF THE MOST HIGH GOD. I WILL BECOME ALL I WAS CREATED TO BE.
and mean it. it helps me.
lovetodance2018 in reply to
I will be praying you are able to see your good features and not focus on any faults. You are special, you do matter, you are beautiful. I found this article today. It is about teens and depression but it could be really for anyone that struggles. I hope you find it helpful. I did. bit.ly/2Sra3zO Hugs
in reply to lovetodance2018
Hi lovetodance2018! I read that article, and it definitely helped me too! Thanks for suggesting I read it. My parents aren't the kind of people to understand deeper emotions; they pretty much just look at things as black and white. So that's why I feel like I can't really tell them anything. And that's why I decided that talking to my boyfriend about all of my problems wasn't what I needed; I needed people who really understand how I feel. Using that platform has really helped me so far, so I'm really glad I found it. I appreciate that people who don't even know who I am take the time to put in an effort to help me. So to anyone reading this, thank you for seeing me and taking the time to care.
lovetodance2018 in reply to
I agree this forum really helps. Reach out anytime. We are here for you. Hugs
in reply to lovetodance2018
Thank you so much! Same to you!
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