Group Chats and Friendships

[Gerbera88]

I made a difficult decision to leave my previous job a year ago for something I thought was more fulfilling. The hardest part about leaving my job was leaving behind the friendships I made at work. I’ve developed nice connections with a group of women there that I was hoping to continue relationships with as I started a new job.

I’m in a texting group chat with this group of women. Over the past couple of months, I’ve noticed that anytime I text something in the group, no one responds to me. I would notice that if someone else responds, they get a response immediately. At first I didn’t think much of it but now I’ve been noticing a trend and it’s really bothering me. Usually the women would send either funny memes or share information about work. So recently I shared something work related and did not hear back from anyone. 9 hours later someone texted “On another note..” and went on to talk about something else. She received a response immediately. I’m not sure why my relationship with them has changed. I initially thought that maybe it was because I don’t work with them anymore so I don’t see them as much as they see each other but there’s another woman in the group who also left the job at the same time as me and she always gets responded to.

I know this all sounds silly since I’m not always keen on maintaining relationships mainly through text messages as things can become misconstrued. However, I’m deeply hurt by it especially since I thought I meant more to this group of women. I feel like I’m being pushed out and contemplating if I should just leave the group chat. I have very few friends in my personal life and although quality is more valuable to me than quantity of friends, it still hurts losing people who means a lot to me. Any thoughts or advice would be helpful. Thanks for reading!

[Hidden]

aw sorry that ppl are ignoring you.. if they are doing that to you then maybe that means they arent good friends. if i were u i would leave the gc and maybe start over with friendships and try to make some more friends. ik its hard starting something new or trying something different but whats the point of being in the gc anyway if they just ignore you. if u leave it u wont get ignored anymore cuz u wont say anything. hope this helped . good luck with whatever you left ur job for

[Downandout123 in reply to Hidden]

I totally agree with this. What's the point of staying? They have made themselves perfectly clear through their silence. I'm sorry this has happened to you, and I know it hurts. 😔

[Gerbera88 in reply to Downandout123]

Thanks so much

[Downandout123 in reply to Gerbera88]

You're welcome

[Gerbera88 in reply to Hidden]

Thanks so much for your thoughts and advice

[Iammesues]

I would leave the group. I guess you can’t leave the chat but you can not respond at all. See if they notice and care. If they don’t, you’ll move on. They would have demonstrated they are not worth your time. You’re possibly just to good for them and may need to accept that

[Gerbera88 in reply to Iammesues]

Thanks so much for your advice and kind words

[Iammesues in reply to Gerbera88]

Please don’t think I’m saying it’s easy but you deserve better

[Iammesues in reply to Gerbera88]

I left a friend who was not being nice for a long time. I’ve never regretted my decision

[Gerbera88 in reply to Iammesues]

It’s never easy losing a friend, even if you know you deserve better. It can be hard finding genuine friends out there who are kind and considerate.

[Freedom57]

I agree with the responses you’ve received

Seems like trying to be a part of the gc makes you feel worse about yourself.

Do whatever helps you love yourself more❤️

[socratesanne]

Feels like a click on here oftentimes and not sure why that would stop the cheating but it seems to be more important nowadays due to trust issues and need for friendships are escalating since we cannot talk to old friends as easilly,, especially if some of them have not survived or lost touch for whatever reason. Good luck and keep reaching out where you want to breed a closeness. this is so hard nowadays. the pandemic only made distancing easier. Trust is needed and when that is breached for whatever reason, it can make matters worse. Something I have experienced also on this site and have very little time to be saddened as it is bad for health, the supposed focus of this group.