I’m sorry

[BrownEyesBlue]

I’m sorry if my posts are annoying or anything of that nature. I’m going through a difficult time. I obviously post for advice and majority of the people are awesome. I’ve deleted my last few messages just because I think I was annoying. I understand criticism is to be expected, and I accept all opinions. Maybe I misinterpreted what was meant but being told to rather spend my money on therapy registered in my mind as, shut up and go seek help. I already have. And thankfully it’s to no cost to me because of where I live. It came across very rude to me and it stung. I’ll get over it but to say that to someone who is struggling just seemed a little crude.

It’s not what you say, it’s how you say it.

I know I gave money out to someone I shouldn’t have but to be told to “save my money and get therapy” is really playing on my mind.

My apologies if I’m bothersome.

[Ladybug9]

Don't ever delete your posts. You obviously posted for a reason and you needed feedback. If people don't want to read your posts, they know how to scroll on by. But give those of us that want to help, a chance to do just that. And trust me, you are NOT annoying!

[BrownEyesBlue in reply to Ladybug9]

Thank you. I feel very defeated. I just think when you respond to someone you should think about how it can come across. I took that statement to heart. And it made me feel like I was being obnoxious.

Thanks again 💖

[Ladybug9 in reply to BrownEyesBlue]

You aren't obnoxious at all. And I hope people never make you feel that way here. I think the people are great here. The problem with texting and this type of communication is that we can misconstrue what someone is trying to say and they may mean it entirely differently than we perseve it. You are doing great.

[isin13955 in reply to BrownEyesBlue]

To my mind whatever people say should fulfil 3 conditions:-

Is it kind

Is it true

Is it necessary

[hypercat54]

BE I have sent you a pm about that. I only meant that often we get stuck in learnt behaviour and follow unhealthy patterns which lay us open to abuse. It seemed to me that you could be doing this with a man who from what you say is clearly abusing you.

Therapy is a very useful tool to learn to start making healthier choices.

That's all I meant and I apologise if it came over as anything else. We have only the written word to communicate and it's easy to read it not as the way it was intended. I meant it for the best, though I appreciate I could have phrased it better. I will delete it.

Take care.

[BrownEyesBlue in reply to hypercat54]

Thank you ❤️

[EleanorRose]

I am so sorry to hear you’ve had that experience here. I’m not sure if I saw your previous posts but I do sometimes read replies from people that seem misjudged or make me feel uncomfortable. I often think talking to other people who have similar experiences is both a blessing and a curse.

Please keep posting and using this site to help you. You don’t need to apologise. Having a difficult time is not a reason to apologise.

I have had lots of therapy but still need support here, too. Sometimes therapy isn’t enough on its own and often I need to talk at times when I am not having therapy and that’s what is great about this site.

Take care, you are not annoying and you don’t ever need to apologise for wanting help.

Eleanor Rose

[Hidden]

Hello,

I haven't read anything of yours, but I will say this: it's really hard to communicate when not face-to-face because we don't get to hear the voice and/or see the emotion behind what's being said. All we get are the words.

[BrownEyesBlue in reply to Hidden]

That I completely understand. There is a way to word things to not across so short/cold though.

[Hidden in reply to BrownEyesBlue]

You do hàve a point...