I have started making progress in my journey. Starting out almost two months ago I began having panic attacks all day everyday. Dizziness, shaking, Weird breathing Patterns racing heart. I put myself in bed out of fear and hardly moved for over a Month. I finally got angry enough that I forced myself up and to move. I make progress every day but I still have the intense “fear”feeling! A lot of nervousness feelings of dread. I feeling like I’m dying. I feel like I live as if I truly have something wrong with me and that I don’t have much time left but I’m just forcing myself along... I don’t live for the future because it feels like I don’t have one. This feeling is devastating and I can’t shake it. I have a new feeling that I haven’t been having. I feel like I am out of it! I feel like I have to question situations I’m in like when Im just having a simple conversation with someone... I have to ask myself is this really happening ... am I dreaming? Am I awake? It’s strange and very scary. I had a brain CT done abnormalities. I don’t have any numbness or tingling no difficulties walking other than the jello leg feeling from the nervousness! I just feel like someone feels when that don’t get enough oxygen kind of dazed.... a mild confusion maybe! This is sending me back down the rabbit hole to the darkest place I have some what crawled out of and as bad as I sound trust me it’s been a lot worse. It’s made me think maybe something is wrong with me something gone wrong that’s even cause all the anxiety In the first place. My doctor blames everything on my anxiety! I just want to know if anybody knows this feeling!?
I am not taking medication. Yes I know it would make this easier, it’s just the approach went with. Long term I felt I would I be better off without having a medication to depend on!
The doctor is right anxiety can cause a hole host of physical symptoms. although I would say these might be the first steps. And then review what's going on.
The first thing I do is learn how to control your breathing I use 7.11 or square breathing, this helps make the panic attacks less scary as you are getting enough oxygen and don't get as dizzy or naesus. I normally just feel a panic attacks starting and keep breathing until it goes away, I know what it is and it isn't as scary then.
I would look into professional help and self help for your anxiety, finding stuff that helps can be a long process but you do find stuff eventually.
It is quite possible that there is something causing the anxiety, like past trauma or ASC, but it's also quite possible life stresses could cause it all, or clinical anxiety.
I would say once you have the breathing so automatic whenever you feel a panic attack starting (I know it's not as easy as it sounds) see what symptoms you have left and track them. The breathing will help you be able to think it won't get rid of the panic attacks just makes them less scary. Hopefully a mental health professional would be able to help you work that out, if you need to go back to the doctor then that's okay too. you also might be experiencing dissociation.
I also try and work out what's my worry or not my worry and wether I can control what I'm worrying about which doing that over and over has helped.
Also don't feel bad about not taking medication it's your choice.
Hope this helps in some way. (Its how I manage my anxiety as much as I can, I still have bad periods of time but I know what it is and how it deal with it)
Sensory tools also helped me.
It being anxiety doesn't make it any less serious and just because these things helped me doesn't mean they will help you so don't feel bad about that.
Glad it could help. It's okay to struggle we just have to try and find ways to help! I know that's easier said than done and we often need a helping hand!
I completely relate to this and I wish I could say it was something else but all of those things can be caused by anxiety. It’s scary but what I found that helped me was identifying those symptoms and recognizing that it’s just your anxiety and it will pass, and take deep breaths. Meditation can also be beneficial. If you’d like some other tips and such please feel free to private message me! I’m also a counselor who suffers from anxiety so I do have resources I can send your way
I find myself nodding through everything you're saying. I've been there, and thankfully am not now. I am taking medication (2 antidepressants with an anxiolytic for breakthrough anxiety). I haven't needed the anxiolytic, Klonopin, for months (years, maybe?) until the world went sideways this year. I take it at night, a low dose, so I can sleep. Here is how I see it, and I realize you may see it differently. You are going through an incredibly painful, stressful exacerbation of a chronic condition. Unfortunately the effects are cumulative--the less sleep you get, the more your anxiety ramps up, and you start to see things, hear things, and you start to believe you're going truly crazy. I hear you when you say you are concerned about dependence on medications, that's a legitimate fear. I personally haven't had any difficulty stopping the use of Klonopin, Xanax, and the like because when I don't need it, it just makes me feel sluggish and tired. When I *do* need it, it makes it so I can function (no sluggish/tired/dopey). When it starts making me feel tired, I lower the dose, and eventually don't need it daily anymore (usually over a period of days, or a week or two). I haven't used it daily in over 20 years--antidepressants and talk therapy keep my anxiety and depression at bay, with an occasional use of Klonopin here or there (like, twice a year) when I feel like I'm spinning like a top.
So! All that to say that it is possible to use anxiety meds (benzodiazepines) and not become dependent on them, it's just a matter of using them appropriately, under a good practitioner's supervision. They can be a bridge to a healthier place. Please understand, I am in NO WAY advocating that you should take them if they're not right for you. I'm just saying I've had some success, and I wanted you to know it's possible. Thanks for reading! I really hope you get some relief soon.
Wow, sorry you are going through all this. Now is a weird time in the world, so I have a feeling that all the craziness NOT in your control is setting it off.
To answer your question, yes, I have felt it. My world seemed like it was spinning. My sleep was off. My focus was off. As I analyzed triggers, NONE were in my control.
I tried to keep myself busy. I am too damn stubborn to let others' issues hold me down. I gardened, I fostered dogs, I DIY'd my house, I walked, I collected free things off Facebook Marketplace and got them to charities. I am not much for yoga or Tai Chi, but some people love the focus.
I went 10 years after diagnosis without meds. The problem became finding enough distractions. I had a car accident March 31, so I am on a combo poo pop platter of meds right now. I had a few panic attacks in the hospital. I received meds. The relief was almost immediate.
Anxiety can do a lot!!! It’s awful!!! I’ve tried EVERY method , from an exercise taping my head ..I forget the rest. All kinds of ideas and therapy. For me NOTHING worked. Medication is the only thing that helps me live and feel normal. You can always try something non addictive. If you feel your not going to live long anyway. That’s exactly how I felt! So I take my meds just like any other person with a disease would. That’s what they are for. While having an attack there are things I try to distract myself. Medication isn’t going to take them away completely. But I’d NEVER be without it. I hope you feel better.
Hi Laesanders89, I know exactly how you're feeling, the only thing with me is that my anxiety is also associated with digestive issues and when I go through a stressful period it affects my eating and I get digestive issues, which exacerbates my anxiety to severe proportions. So not only do I have the psychological symptoms you are experiencing, I also get somatic anxiety i.e. all types of physical sensations namely Irritable bowel syndrome, pins and needles in my stomach, face, tongue, weakness in my legs, racing heart, nervousness, blurred vision, excessive burping, excessive sweating, headaches etc... I experience panic attacks, insomnia, feeling like I am dying, excessive crying and feelings of depression and feelings of despair and in this latest bout I was having panic attacks every morning. I have felt dazed and confused and and like you when you said - "I have to ask myself is this really happening ... am I dreaming?" I think that's called derealization.
I've been to doctors and was even hospitalized for this, took many tests and all have come back negative so the conclusion by doctors is this is all anxiety & depression. Like you I resist taking medication and that's because I fear becoming addicted but I have used benzodiazepines over the years and they are the only meds. that give me relief but I only take them when I am going through a very low period and I absolutely cannot cope. Otherwise I just pray and hang in there, believing that this too shall pass.
For me I realize that these episodes are always triggered by not managing my stress using positive strategies but instead going into avoidance and escape mode, so I now know I have to learn to manage my stress in positive ways, so perhaps you can investigate your triggers and learn to avoid them in the long term.
I have had a very similar experience, though I think not as hard as yours. I wanted to mention the use of Hydroxyzine, which has helped me tremendously. I can take it twice a day, 25-50mg and I can really feel the anxiety ebbing. I thought that others might consider talking with their health professional about it. I don't know a heck of a lot about it, but it has surely been a great help for me. Here's a blurb about it:
"Hydroxyzine is used to treat itching caused by allergies. It is an antihistamine and works by blocking a certain natural substance (histamine) that your body makes during an allergic reaction. Hydroxyzine may also be used short-term to treat anxiety or to help you feel sleepy/relaxed before and after surgery."
No one can truly ever walk in the shoes that you've walked in and I don't believe in saying that I know what you're going through, because everyone handles situations differently, no matter how exact they may seem or feel.
That being said, I've experienced times where I can't tell the differences between reality and if I might have died in my sleep and I'm just living in limbo. I'll wake from sleep and walk around my apt and just not feel connected to anything my body is doing and it just feels like I'm watching my life play out through some spectator's eyes.
My heart doesn't feel like it's beating correctly, my lungs don't feel like they're getting oxygen, my brain feels completely scrambled and I don't feel like I'm okay in the slightest. I've taken tests, I've even purchased EKG and heart rate monitors to just see what is happening to my body during these moments that I feel lost and disconnected. Finding anchors back to reality is what has helped most. I wear a smartwatch that is tied to my phone and keeps track of my vitals. It keeps my present and helps me understand my body more.
When I talked to my therapist about all these things, he made it seem extremely simple. Yes, it was the anxiety, but the thing with anxiety, it mutates and manifests into other parts of our lives and will do whatever it can to be the dominant emotion. It's like having a superpower you never asked for or wanted or being slipped a drug. You're constantly on high alert and you don't know how to handle being in this state of heightened fear.
All your symptoms - fear, panic attacks, non reality, feeling of not taking in enough oxygen - are classic symptoms of anxiety. It is, however, hard to accept that since the effects on our mind and body feel so deep and so physically and real. There are, in my experience, three ways to approach this:
1. Learning to still the body and mind through breathing exercises, mindfulness techniques and meditation. You cannot have a panic attack if your body is at fully at ease and relaxed.
2. CBT therapy which helps you re-address your patterns of thinking so that your thoughts are better managed and controlled and less able to spiral out of control.
3. Doing deeper work on really knowing yourself via life reflection and contemplation (perhaps through longer term therapy).
There is a school of thought that suggests that anxiety acts as warning beacon to show us that there are aspects of our life and journey that are in conflict or misaligned and that these inner conflicts, doubts and concerns are being repressed rather than understood and addressed. Anxiety can act as distraction in that it can be easier to focus on those feelings rather than the underlying issues. This view was recently built upon by Johann Hari in his book “Lost Connections” where, he says, that anxiety is a modern phenomena caused by a lack of connection either to aspect of ourselves or to the outer world. In his book, he identifies 9 different losses of connection that can be triggers for anxiety.
Laesanders89, I understand where you are coming from with your anxiety and panic attacks. I spent the majority of my life suffering from such severe anxiety, I wanted to die. I would take medication, only for it to make me feel numb and lose my personality. I want you to know that it is possible to conquer anxiety and panic attacks without medication. Achieving a beautiful life without anxiety to hold you back is possible! Think of it this way...if your mind can create thoughts that produce enough anxiety to spawn physical health issues and panic attacks, it can also do the opposite. You can train your mind to work for you, and not against you. As someone who has personally conquered these things, I want to help point you in the right direction to do the same. My entire purpose for living is to help others, as I have been helped. I highly recommend you read a book that helped me on my journey of self discovery and self improvement. It is what taught me everything I needed to know about myself and how to get rid of this anxiety within me. I can paste my link below in this chat to a copy of it, if you would like to read it. It is a beautiful book.
Again, I tell you this with a full heart that an exciting, anxiety-free life exists! I am living proof. Please let me know if you would like the link, or if you would like to chat via email outside of this site. I am always here for encouragement and motivation. With much Love!
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