Miserable

[Scatteredtulips]

I’m in no way looking for any responses to this, I am merely venting out of pure sadness and frustration. I just need to get this out somewhere for myself.

Each time I think I can make any progress with my self image, I get a blow to the chest. Knocked back down. Struggle to even get to my feet again.

I get told not to compare myself to others or there’s no need, but there is! Especially when the prevalence of other women is around. Gorgeous and so fit it’s not even funny. I don’t compare to them and it “doesn’t matter” but at the same time I can tell it does deep down. Clearly I am not enough in that sense and the need to look for the rest of what I don’t have is a high need.

I can’t even begin to grow in this area of my life. I can’t love myself or see beauty in myself when I feel so much lesser than those women on Instagram who have attention when I’m asleep or away.

I hate being lied to about it too. I’m not clueless to how algorithms work and what appears on feeds after lookin at certain things. You search it, it shows up.

Why do people lie? I don’t think it’s to protect the other, I think it’s to be selfish and secretive and feel bigger than the other person so they can’t be right.

I’m tired of wishing I looked like someone I wasn’t. I’m tired of feeling like I need to compete with women who aren’t in the picture. I just hate myself and wish I was so much more so that I was wanted as much as I could be.

I’m sick of being walked on and lied to. I don’t do anything to deserve that. I’ve got a big heart I really do and to disrespect me and not appreciate me enough just hurts.

[Dolphin14]

I wouldn't use Instagram as a guide to who you should be or what you should look like.

Things are superficial, you are only going to see the good stuff. No one will ever show their bad stuff on social media.

Just be you, don't try to be someone else. I do believe in taking care of myself. Exercise, eat right, look my best when I go out etc. But, who we are is all on the inside. One of the teachers I listen to in meditation always says " let your light shine"

Go out and " let your light shine" just be you.

[ivy0]

I hear You, Scattered. I see you! You’re unique, you’re all you, the only one, and you’re great as is. Be kind to yourself, as others would.

[Hidden]

I would respond, but you don’t want help, so just remember I am here for you❤️