"For when thoughts are loud on a quiet day"

[Shanm2]

This sentence has been going through my mind in the last hour. My reason for this stems from the moment I woke with the negative and unhealthy thoughts have been circulating my mind.

I couldn't seem to quiet my mind or rationalise these thoughts, or get to the root of why i've been thinking this way.

So I done something i dont normally do nor recommend doing; and type this sentence into google and this was the 1st result i found:

My thoughts are louder

"It is not uncommon to have loud, intrusive thoughts when you are suffering from anxiety. Truth is, when people suffer from anxiety, they become hyper aware of their random thinking. ... Your anxiety has only made these thoughts louder than normal. Remind yourself often that they are "only thoughts", they are no big deal."

It got me thinking "Okay, I'm having one of those days where im struggling to keep the light bright enough for me to not go (fall) back into the darkness of the shadows. That these thoughts are just as they are "thoughts"

So my next step was; my brain is being clouded by impulsive and fast thoughts to the point my head is starting to hurt and im being consumed/drained by my thinking.

What can i do at this moment in time to try and ease the pressure of not being able to control whats running through my mind?

Here is where i came to type it out - while i can still sentence something together. And after this is done, i will try picking a pen and write until i can't write no longer.

However, going back to the search result i came across;

"Remind yourself often that they are "only thoughts", they are no big deal" I found that if i reminded that my thoughts aren't a big deal, that in my mind it would do the exact opposite. Am i wrong?

Because on today like this, when my thoughts are extra loud and potentially dangerous, I'm again aware the there is a problem somewhere that i might not be fully aware of, therefore i understand that i need to definitely get some more counselling as reaching out to the people "around me" isnt something i feel comfortable with. And i know myself well enough to know; if its not something i feel comfortable doing, i will more than likely isolate myself from them and fall quickly and harder into the shadows.

So if you've made it this far! Sorry for the super long essay! 😭

[Puzzled57]

Those loud negative thoughts can send a person reeling and spinning further into the darkness. I have had my share and they have led me to places I prefer not to ever go to again (but I know I will bc it’s the nature of the beast). Lately I have found that when the “voice” or thoughts get loud and start resonating I have to say ‘STOP’ out loud to myself. They are not real or true. Saying it out loud amplifies this reality. It sounds silly but it has helped. I hope you find a way to thwart those thoughts, squash those demons!!!

(((((Hugs)))))

[Shanm2 in reply to Puzzled57]

Im sorry that you have gone to the those dark places. I've got to give you a little praise for when the thoughts have been getting loud and the reassurance you've given yourself! (it doesnt sound silly!)

I hope you are doing well!

Thank you for the reply and suggestion