Leaving an emotionally abusive relationship

[Bellajade]

Hello. I'm new. I left my selfish boyfriend close to a year ago. A 40-something wanna be musician whom I supported for five years. Why am I still struggling with my self-esteem? I left. I put myself first. I have no contact with him. Why do I still feel bad about myself? Are his cruel comments and actions going to stay with me forever?

[kenster1]

hi and welcome to you any nasty comments will soon leave your memory actions probably a little longer but it will make you stronger.

[All_alone]

Hi and welcome. My spouse passed two years ago and the hurtful comments still go thru my head at times. Please know you deserve so much more then to support someone who doesn't support you. It takes a while, but being good and kind to yourself has helped me.

[Mumma_h]

Hi bellajade,so glad to hear you've left!!! Don't underestimate the affects of emotional abuse. I was in an emotionally ,psychologically, financially.... Abusive marriage for 20 yrs and I want you to know you can definitely heal from it,he totally destroyed my spirit and now I've found what makes ME happy . It took a while but I love my life again,far from perfect but a million better than the depression I was in. No more going to bed when I'm told or cooking what I'm told or going or doing what I'm told ,or plain not giving a ........ what I'm doing at all. You must must believe in yourself again . Believe in your own values and thoughts again, believe that you 100% deserve love and respect just like everyone else and that you will have that oneday . Do things that YOU enjoy, anything that picks you up ,and if you're able open up and talk to those close to you about how low his words have got you down . You're not alone ❤️🌈

[jujubeezz]

Hi Bellajade,

I was in an abusive relationship many years ago. I grew up that way so it was kind of normal. So that is what i felt like that’s what I deserved. It took awhile after that to realize I would rather be alone than live like that. The courage to leave is the first step. Take sometime to understand many can’t even do that, it’s that hard. It’s normal to struggle with your self esteem abusive people prey on that so that you will stay.

It does get better you deserve to be happy in your life and love yourself. It takes work, you’ve already done that hard part so it’s all going to get better from here.

Take care.