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[Linda418]

The crisis hotline suggested this site. I currently have no help as I can't leave my house due to fear. I have spent the last 7 months looking for someone to help me. I'm at a point of giving up.

[Hidden]

We are all here to help you with what you are going through

[Linda418 in reply to Hidden]

First of all, I'm hoping that I am doing this right, I am new to online discussions. I just need a support system. I currently have only my grown daughter, and a daily call with my aged mother. I can't get a psychiatrist or therapist because I can't leave the house.

[Hidden in reply to Linda418]

Well, that post was good.

[Linda418 in reply to Hidden]

Thanks

[MissMoto007]

I felt the same, and I didn't want people to see me or leave my safe place .. after a breakdown, I lost all my coping mechanisms and I couldn't even make phone calls. I can't mend and rebuild myself properly, as after 2 years, things that tipped me over the edge haven't changed much, but even with crippling low self-esteem, I've been able to go out occasionally and I'm reaching out more, despite days when I get overwhelmed again. My saving grace was one-to-one counselling provided by NHS team. The maximum number of sessions is 8 and we were able to uncover causes and psychological problems from my past and a recovery strategy was planned.

So, it's up to me, but in my own time - it won't be a quick fix, because whoever you are, life keeps throwing wobbles.

Your GP can help by referring you, or some areas offer a self-referral system, and I can't recommend it highly enough.

Talking to someone who cares is very important - your posting thoughts and feelings is good- you know that you're 'talking' to people who understand, and maybe someone will inspire you with their story

[NWGal]

We're here for you - without judgment. Share as much or as little as you feel comfortable doing.

[Jeff1943]

Linda, welcome to our forum, here you will find understanding, reassurance and suggestions to help in your recovery.

I'm sorry to hear that you fear leaving your home but agoraphobia is a very frequent symptom of high anxiety. Things have happened in your life to cause you constant stress and a point is reached when the mind can take no more. Our nervous system becomes over sensitised and we become subject to all sorts of strange symptoms and bad feelings.

One such is agoraphobia, the fear of leaving home. Your subconscious senses your high anxiety and unhelpfully seeks to protect you by making you stay in the 'safety' of your home. This was o.k. when hungry dinosaurs roamed the outside world but those threats are long gone.

You know full well that no dangers await you if you went outside. On the contrary, many enjoyable and helpful things await you there such as being able to visit a therapist.

I am going to suggest that your fear is not of some outside threat. Your fear is of feeling fear should you go outside and that is what makes you stay a prisoner in your own home - not some non-existent danger beyond your front door.

You have within you the ability to leave home and join the outside world. All that is needed is a different mental attitude that is not hard to embrace. I am going to suggest that you go for a walk outside and instead of fighting the bad feelings when they come you simply accept them for the time being. You see, fighting only causes more strain and tension: that only makes things worse not better. But if you accept the bad feeling when it comes you stop making things worse, by accepting them for the moment you reduce the tension and you find walking outdoors is nowhere as bad as you expected.

If your legs feel weak do not worry, even jelly legs will take you there and back albeit at a modest pace. Why worry if people wonder why you dawdle or steady yourself for a second against a wall, they are too taken up with their own lives to give you a second thought. And just imagine the sense of triumph when you return from that short walk: you accepted the feeling of fear for the moment and you won!

There was a woman doctor who helped thousands of people with agoraphobia reclaim the great outdoors using the method based on Acceptance I have briefly described. I am but a poor advocate for her method which is contained in one short easy-to-read book. Her name was Doctor Claire Weekes, her book 'Self help from your nerves' is available new or used from Amazon and Ebay.

Not only will Claire Weekes explain her method for overcoming agoraphobia in full, the book also tells how to deal with the anxiety that causes symptoms like agoraphobia in the first place.

Linda, I commend this book to you. It was written decades ago but continues to sell in great numbers: it has withstood the test of time. If you only read one more book in your life this is that book.

[NikeYrk]

Hi! I would suggest checking out my page I post a lot of info about panic disorder/agoraphobia/ hypersensitivity and ways to help recover!

[Agora1]

Hi Linda418, Welcome to this amazing forum. I certainly can understand

your fear but never ever give up. I was agoraphobic for 5 years, couldn't even

stick my head out the door to get the mail. My anxiety had gotten so bad that

I feared everything. I was fortunate in finding a therapist who came to my home

several times and then did weekly phone sessions. I was on antianxiety medication

which helped some but I knew I had to do something more than this.

I spent my time researching the Mind/Body Connection. I listened to the CDs of

Dr. Claire Weekes over and over again. I reached out to YouTube as my "go to".

I learned self hypnosis, mindfulness, imagery etc in Meditation form helped lower

my anxious thoughts. I studied and practiced Proper Breathing which really helped

lower my adrenaline and calmed my heart and nervous system. But most of all,

I took to heart what Dr. Weekes taught her patients and that was the key to anxiety

being Acceptance. Accepting that anxiety is not harmful. Once we learn to let go

of the fear, the symptoms will fade away in time.

That was 7 years ago. Since then I am able to leave my home without a problem.

I got off my antianxiety medication and barely talk with the therapist except on

occasion in updating her. It is a freedom and a long overdue amazing feeling. I won over

anxiety. I never gave up. There is an answer waiting for you as well. Listening and

sharing your journey with mental health issues will make you feel so not alone.

We are in this together and together we are stronger. Stay Positive my friend,

your day is coming soon. xx

[Funkyfaerie]

Hi Linda,

Welcome....

I just wanted to tell you briefly about my sister. I have my own reasons / symptoms for being on here...

But my sister, didn't go out of the house for 4 years, she suffered anxiety, aches and pains, dizziness etc and was scared to go out. My Mother and I were really concerned.

But one day completely out of the blue, she came downstairs put on her coat and boots and went out of the front door. She was only gone 15 minutes, walked to the end of the road and back. I asked her why she did that, she replied " I had got to the end of my tether with this and felt I was wasting my life, and thought if I go out and I fall over, someone will help me"

She never fell over, nothing ever happened, and from that day to this she has got stronger and stronger. She met a nice guy and now even goes on foreign holidays.

I just wanted to send you a positive story.