Sadness go away!

[Windyred]

Just broke up with my boyfriend of six months. I was depressed before we broke up because things weren’t working and the relationship was toxic. Still sad some days. I just want to feel happiness and connection again. I have a good support system but even with their help I’m fighting off the sadness. The last couple years have been rough and I see such pity in their eyes. Hoping for healing soon! Prayers are appreciated.

[Boomba76]

Praying you find peace. 🙏🏻

[meredithr]

Praying for you. Just remember that it is absolutely natural to have a dip in serotonin, dopamine etc when you go through a breakup. It’s not you making it worse. Let yourself feel. I can connect fully with the feeling of not wanting to let on to your support network because you feel like they have already put in their time.

As to wanting happiness and a healthy relationship you will find it.

Just finalized my second divorce. I’m single. Have an 8 year old and working two jobs. I was terrified. I am happy alone right now. Taking care of my son and my self. Still struggling with depression, panic disorder and ptsd

Life is fucking hard

We need each other

If I can help let me knwo

[quitter333]

"I just want to feel happiness and connection again"

That is called "bounce-back relationship", when people try to immediately seek the next person to be with. I would advise you to cool it down. I was one the guy in such a bounce-back (I didn't know, but the girl was fresh out of 2+ year relationship) and I actually had a crush on her... you know, it was not pleasant for me, as there was sort of weird unreal "love". Felt insencere and broke MY heart.

So... be a little bit more in control of your emotions, I'd advise. There are very few things in life that should be done as you immediately feel.

[Windyred in reply to quitter333]

Quitter,

I agree. I’ve committed to not looking or being open to anything until I am emotionally, spiritually and physically healthy. I meant more just happiness with myself and being able to connect in my life. That person was my bounce back after a divorce. I still loved him I just wasn’t healthy enough to be in a relationship. That may have been the case in your situation too. It is possible to love 2 people at once and neither work out. That’s what happened in my case. I loved my boyfriend but I was creating the same toxic environment I had just left. I am sure you’re a great person and will find love when you’re ready.

I did feel out of control in that relationship because it was toxic. It’s a weird combination of sadness and relief that I feel more stable. I had become very depressed towards the end. Even though I’m still sad I would say some of the depression has lifted. So I am encouraged by that. This group of caring people has definitely helped!

[mvillarreal]

I'm sorry that happened. Is part of the sadness that you're grieving the relationship you had?

[Windyred in reply to mvillarreal]

Yes. I don’t think I was over the divorce.

[mvillarreal in reply to Windyred]

I can't imagine what that must be like. On the one hand, it sounds like the relationship was very toxic and harmed you, and you needed to get out. On the other hand, it sounds like you still love him as a person and miss the relationship you had-at least to some extent. Those mixed feelings can make the process of grief even harder, I imagine.

[Rachel2535]

Know I am praying for you and when things pile up the best place to go is to God. Toxic is never good I had many relationships like that before my husband. When people pity us they don’t realize it actually makes matters worse pity is contagious and if we catch it it only adds to the heart ache. So hold fast God has this as He does your future. You will feel hope and happiness. -Rachel

[FOF9303]

@Windyred

Sorry you are feeling so down right now. Change is scary for all of us, but this change is something that you needed if you had a toxic relationship. As far as your support group and seeing pity in their eyes, what you are seeing is love, kindness, and caring. All that pity is anyway is compassion we feel for others when they are suffering. So don't think of it as a bad thing... think of it as your people loving you. Here some good insight on toxic relationships and why you are better to be out of it. bit.ly/2PAf3jW

I like how he says this "Your life is like a tree and people are the branches. Learning to handle toxic people is learning that, sadly, some branches (relationships) need to be cut off. " Things will turn around for you-- one day at a time! I will be praying for you.

[Windyred in reply to FOF9303]

Thank you! I needed this today! Thanks for letting God lead you and give me just the words I needed to be uplifted. Praying for you also!!