Mental Illness & Care Giving

[JayKay4]

Hello! I am new to this community and new to getting myself any type of support for myself. I am my husband's care giver (he has schizoaffective disorder) and am starting to feel the weight of it now after living together in our adult lives for five years. I feel like I live in constant anxiety and I am starting to feel depression creep in at times. We have been best friends since we were teenagers, dated in high school, did the whole shabang and got married just a little over two years ago, and we complete each other. We have a 12 year history with each other! He has been struggling for the last year or so and we finally went for a med change a little over a week ago, which is very stressful. I am having a hard time not worrying about him when I am away during the day and having a hard time working with him to get through the basic tasks of the day without it feeling like he is going to blow up or there is going to be an argument. It's a very stressful time on top of what we typically go through on a regular basis. It's definitely harder for him to go through what he does with his mental illness, and I don't mean to sound selfish like what I go through is worse than what he goes through. I often feel like I am forgotten as no one ever checks in on me to see how I am doing.... Everyone always asks how he is, but never thinks about how I am doing caring for him. I have always been a very strong individual, but it would be nice to feel like someone is there for me once in a while. If I do anything or want to do anything without him (which is never really), I feel guilty like I should be doing everything with him. Does anyone have any advice?

[NWGal]

Are there any resources available to you for respite care? Respite care givers are trained individuals who step in to take over care so you can get a break from caregiving. If you can get someone over on a regular basis - say once a week, it will give you something to look forward to and you can spend some time on self-care. Just a thought. Good karma coming your way my friend.

[JayKay4 in reply to NWGal]

I never thought about respite care! I am not sure if it would be an option for me or if it's something I could even budget, but never thought about it so I could take a look. Thank you for that! I appreciate it.

[NWGal in reply to JayKay4]

I would call your local chapter of NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) and ask for respite care resources. Sometimes there are volunteers or interns that will come for little or no cost to you. Check it out!