Battling obsession

[Kat63]

I’m fighting a battle with my mind again this morning.

My mind wants to obsess about my relationship. Even though I have other interesting things to do. I can go on FB. I can read a book. I can practice using Photoshop. But in my mind, everything comes second to the relationship. Only if I feel absolutely safe and reassured about that, can my mind stop going over it and turn to something else.

I wish I could know for sure, once and for all, that everything is going to be all right. OR that my mind could shut up about it. Obsessing sucks.

[a_work_in_progress]

Hi Kat63 yes it is awful to be in battle with yourself all the time. Try to be in the moment just this one moment matters this one moment this one peaceful moment and then the moments will add up and before you know it you’ve conquered the battle you’ve won hugs 🤗

[Lulu02]

Sorry can I just ask where the obsession is coming from? Like OCD or GAD?

[Kat63 in reply to Lulu02]

I think I have GAD, but don’t have an official diagnosis. I wouldn’t be at all surprised to learn that I have some OCD as well.

[a_work_in_progress in reply to Kat63]

Actually I think this is the new normal. Most people I talk to are anxious about something in their life and have bouts of depression.

[Lulu02 in reply to Kat63]

To me it looks like ocd. I know someone who was diagnosed because of her constant obsession with natural disasters and her fear of them. It’s not the classic OCD where you’re constantly washing hands and repeating rituals but it still falls under OCD through the constant thoughts and urges to do something in order to calm yourself down.

[Lulu02 in reply to Lulu02]

Also if you don’t mind me asking, what specific about the relationship are you obsessing over?

[Kat63 in reply to Lulu02]

I’ve obsessed about every relationship I’ve ever been in. When I’m not in one, I obsess about that.

[Lulu02 in reply to Kat63]

Is it about where they are? What they’re doing? What they’re thinking? Or Is it less paranoid and more ‘I can’t stop thinking about him I wish I was with him’ kinda thing?

[Kat63 in reply to Lulu02]

Not paranoid, no. Definitely the other kind.

[Lulu02 in reply to Kat63]

Honestly don’t know how to help with that because I struggle with the same thing. Broken up now but I never ever spent time to work on myself and do the things I use to enjoy. When I did do those things I was still constantly texting him, I started to forget my own personality because everything was about him.

[Kat63 in reply to Lulu02]

I think I’m getting better about stuff like that. And I’m in a 12-Step program that’s helping, called Love Addicts Anonymous.

[Coralrose5]

Does it help to recognize that these are just thoughts and you don’t have to analyze or take stock in them?

[Kat63 in reply to Coralrose5]

Yes!

[Coralrose5]

Do you still have that cbt workbook? Perhaps take a look at it tonight and see if you can find some constructive information about intrusive thoughts.

[Hidden]

Resonates with me this 😔 it’s exhausting..I’m sorry you experience it kat.

I’ve not been in a relationship for a while now...and I’ve fortunately got used to it and found a kind of peace around that, but I’m obsessing about my neighbours now and how nosey they are and intrusive, some Days I can’t go out when they are around....i find it similar to the relationship one, but a different scenarios, I’m so sick of it...the exhaustion ..it doesn’t help that we have a communal garden and I live in an apartment which means they are closeby..I have been told I have social anxiety but wouldn’t be surprised if gad or ocd is involved too, I ruminate constantly over it...😔

I feel for you,

I’m going to have some more cbt hopefully and I’m hoping it helps address some of it or give me some guidance on how to cope...I meditate and that helps a little but when it’s something that is there 24/7 it’s difficult to say the least.

Xxx