Photos and the memories they hold *trigger warning

[brokenlight]

We are moving out of the place where we have lived for nearly a decade to a new city on the opposite side of the country.

This has been quite a long and exhausting process to say the least...

One of the hardest things I’ve had to do so far is look through thousands of disorganized photographs; photos of my children’s births & lives, photos of the fathers who abandoned them, photos from my birth & life, photos of the fathers who have abandoned me, photos of old marriages, photos of friends who are long gone, photos of people who have emotionally & psychologically abused me, photos of people who have physically & sexually abused me, photos that correlate to specific terrible memories or people, beloved animals & people that have passed, old loves, some truly joyful moments, and a whole lot of pain.

I’ve probably spent 11 hours doing this project through all the crying & breaks I’ve needed to take... but I’m getting closer and making “safe” photo albums to take with us on the move! Plus reflecting, processing, throwing things out, & tucking specific things away & will revisit them when I’m mentally able to explore them.

[Starrlight]

Wow. That’s tough. I’m so sorry. That reminds me of a time I went through stuff and ended up burning letters and things and it really let me let go of some heaviness. I hope you feel lighter after sorting through the photos. Sending you good vibes ((((((((((((((( ❤️ ❤️ ❤️

[brokenlight]

Thank you so much Starrlight.

I really appreciate your response 🧡

Thank you for your kindness & support!

I’m so glad the process you went through left you feeling lighter.

I too wish for the same for me.

Thank you again ✨✨✨

[hypercat54 in reply to brokenlight]

Yes I agree with Star. Have a big burning session of all the photos that trigger horrible memories and only keep those that make you feel good. x

[brokenlight in reply to hypercat54]

Thank you for your response hypercat54.

I’m not sure I’ll do the burning thing, but I’ve known others to do it too & it’s been beneficial for them.

I think for me personally, I’m not ready to let some of them go.

They are attached to things I still need to process & heal through. Having a photo to match it will be helpful in my writing process when the time comes. So my “burn” photos will be safely tucked away out of sight until I am ready to dive in. 🙂

[hypercat54 in reply to brokenlight]

Whatever is best for you is the right thing to do. x

[brokenlight in reply to hypercat54]

👍🏾😊🧡

[SuZQ154 in reply to brokenlight]

Sorry for your pain. Yet, you seem to have a healthy perspective on grieving! That's wonderful. Trusting your "gut" or praying about the issue of which the "picture" reminds you, helps determine your next step. We have to work "through" grief, not around it. And, everyone is different.

Through personal experience, I have learned that hanging onto my unforgiveness is not healthy for me. Nonetheless, letting go and forgiving are not always that simple and may look different depending on the circumstance. Sometimes, it is asking for forgiveness, sometimes it is forgiving someone in my heart and yet avoiding him because he is still abusive, sometimes, it is confronting a person about a hurt he has caused me and trying to work toward reconciliation. In all cases, I have to choose to forgive for my own mental, physical, and spiritual health. It is a choice and yet I sometimes hang on to my unforgiveness. I have to take baby steps toward forgiving.

Praying for you to find your next steps

[brokenlight in reply to SuZQ154]

Thank you so much for your reply SuZQ154 💛✨