Better or worse (trigger warning)

Has your life gotten better admitting you’re depression to people and seeking help?

Are you better or just more confused by the meds and therapy and possibilities.

Personally since seeking treatment and meds and therapy all I’ve managed to do is distance myself further from people who don’t understand.

People also distance themselves from me because they know they don’t relate to the thoughts of welcoming death at every f@cking thing that goes wrong.

Have you tried new meds?!?

Have you talked to someone who is educated on depression?!

Yes yes and fucking yes.

Apparently the best advice I’ve ever been given by a dear friend was simply

“Don’t take the easy way out bro, stay here and fucking suffer like the rest of us!”

Anyway, how are y’all today?

[Sillysausage234]

Totally understand the worst case scenario option it’s my go to solution when the shit hits the fan ....at least dogs understand us .

[Hidden in reply to Sillysausage234]

Man I feel like the dogs have that silent way of saying “I know this shit sucks but you’re my dude and you make my life so much cooler when you’re around so don’t lose your shit ok?!”

At least that’s the frequency I absorb from them.

That lick on the face is a hard connection to ignore. Thanks sausage bro I really appreciate y’all and your support

[Sillysausage234 in reply to Hidden]

There’s definitely an understanding going on ....I’ve just been out for a ride in the car and shared my bacon roll with my dog 😄

[Hidden in reply to Sillysausage234]

I would also share bacon with your dog. I might even get touchy feely with them haha

[Sillysausage234 in reply to Hidden]

Their world is definitely better with us in it .....they need us !!

[Hidden in reply to Sillysausage234]

Can confirm. I’m just a guest in my new house. I actually feel used some days, but it gives me some purpose!!

[Sillysausage234 in reply to Hidden]

Oh yeah but the love that they give us is worth it ....I get physically assaulted sometimes but that’s ok ....it’s my kick up the ass to wake up go and hunt some squirrels

[Hidden in reply to Sillysausage234]

My dog isn’t that gentle, hard to snuggle with her. Shes 84 pounds of unconditional love but she’s manipulative, I wouldn’t have it any other way.

My cats, rule the house. Constant meows to go outside and explore. They never did this at my old house. I’m constantly pleasing them now. 😁

[Sillysausage234 in reply to Hidden]

Yeah cats definitely take the piss 😅

[Hidden in reply to Sillysausage234]

I ever only had dogs, so I was never a cat person really. But I found one as crazy as me at a rescue event which I went to fully intending to get a dog. Came home with a kitten. What was I thinking. 😂

[Sillysausage234 in reply to Hidden]

Mine managed to sneak past the sleeping terrier before and slip upstairs....jumped up and knocked everything off my cupboards again....looked like I’ve been burgled.....your like me I went to market to get some chickens for some eggs and thought it was a good idea to buy 2 call ducks ....white ones like duie and Louie ...then had to make a pond...they are not called call ducks for nothing 😆quackkkkk quackkkkkk quackkkkkkkkkk🤪

[Hidden in reply to Sillysausage234]

Haha. Love this. 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[Hidden]

Thank you friend it’s nice to relate isn’t it.

[Sugold]

From how I have experienced, people will be very much disappointed by expecting fast results, like a medicine or technique miraculously helping a depressed person within a few days in short span of time. That's obviously not how a depression can be "cured". Especially if the depression has been going on deep-rooted and for a longer time, we should abandon the thought of seeking instant relief. Instead, we should accept that depression is about caring thoroughly for yourself and doing this with the right amount of effort and care, instead of something that we have to get rid off as soon as possible.

[Hidden in reply to Sugold]

I know there is no getting rid of this. But it never changes. The meds work for a bit then fizzle out.

I exercise 5 days a week.

I eat somewhat healthy.

I have multiple hobbies.

I have a daily battle plan but the resentment just builds and people get sick of hearing why I’m quiet. Thanks for the thoughts friend

[Sankissjuice]

It is helpful to admit to people who understand. Extremely unhelpful to those who don't understand and it is really not their fault.

Most people abandoned me completely once I got sick. Only a tiny few stuck around. I used to be more depressed because of that, not anymore. It's hard on them too.

New meds are always extremely tough but once you get used to it, your world can be brand new and sparkly again.

Stay with supportive people. We are on this tough journey together. I hope I wake up better tomorrow. I had a bad day but the evening totally picked up!

Message supportive people here and we can encourage each other.

[Hidden in reply to Sankissjuice]

If I had a superpower it would be to give others my mental pain for like 10 seconds when it’s at its peak and then watch the happiness drain from their soul. Would be waaaay easier than trying to explain mental illness and the fear that comes with it

[Sankissjuice in reply to Hidden]

I tell myself this: I am more compassionate and empathetic towards millions of people worldwide because I can relate to them completely. So, this is not a punishment but a gift. We will gain strength, wisdom, courage, new appreciation for simplicity and life, with each dark phase we overcome. Spin this to be so damn positive, that even Depression has to bow and salute our perseverance. D can't stay forever. Just a visitor. Give it some loving kindness and positivity gradually it won't want to stay. Use reverse psychology. "Depression, you may stay as long as you want to. We can enjoy sleeping and being tired together." Haha.

Stay faithful and hopeful. I know we do recover eventually. Keep taking meds. Keep speaking out to spread awareness.

These are not empty words. My life and my parents have been severely affected because of D. But I have to neutralise it with positivity. Throw everything positive at it.

[Hidden in reply to Sankissjuice]

Well said and very relatable thank you

[Sankissjuice in reply to Hidden]

We need each other. Keep supporting people here and elsewhere. Focus on helping others so effects of Depression gradually become milder. I need you. I'm very strong now because it's evening. Tomorrow morning may be a different story...

[Hidden]

Thank you friend. Likewise. I’m not always on here because it’s so fucking depressing but I try to connect when I can and stay connected with some great people also suffering

[Charl-]

I always feel so much better when I admit I'm struggling. My brain calms down once I've said those words. In my case it's definitely more mind over matter.As difficult as it can be, reaching out has been my saviour.

[Marysblue]

I'm struggling this morning and I was yesterday morning too. I let something as simple as a friend not calling me back trigger my insecurities. Been fighting negative thoughts with more positive ones. Going to treat myself to a walk in a beautiful park ,read an uplifting book, listen to good music. And keep fighting this negative BS in my head.

And you're right no one gets us who hasn't had some chronic depression. That's why I love this group.

[Hidden in reply to Marysblue]

I could be in a great place for what seems like a long time...stable and battle ready mentally.

Then the right convo happens with my wife or family etc and my brain goes into hell mode.

I’m getting better at not “losing” myself thinking that death is the only answer and finding alternative futures and thinking of ways to perform them but good lord why does it just get away from us sometimes?!

[Marysblue in reply to Hidden]

I wish I knew. But thankfully it does happen less once you become aware of it and see it for the downward spiral it is.

[Sankissjuice in reply to Hidden]

Maybe so we learn patience? I don't know but I tell myself that.

[Indiegal]

I've dealt with depression for most of my life and have learned to only talk about it with people who understand it. I've never told my mom I'm in therapy or that I was on meds for years because she doesn't understand. I said something to her and my dad years ago about wanting to go to therapy and they freaked out and said, "no, they'll put you on a bunch of meds and you don't want that." After that I decided to suffer in silence since a) they didn't understand the difference between therapy and seeing a psychiatrist and b) they'll always have that stigma against it and it's not worth opening that can of worms. I've found a few friends over the years I could tell, some of which have dealt with it themselves, so I'm not completely suffering in silence, but I'm careful how I word things to my mom when I have bad episodes of depression.

[Hidden in reply to Indiegal]

I’ve laid it all out for my closest family and friends. They know I yearned to drive into a wall at 140+ years ago.

My mother’s mom had killed herself by writing a letter and letting herself drown.

My mother’s sister did it with pills.

I’m the next in line with the family “bug” but I’ve spent years now learning about it and battling it trying to break the chain.

I didn’t realize I even had the potential to be loony till I was married with kids. I never understood and didn’t learn of my gram till I was an adult.

I resent the fact I didn’t learn about it when I struggled as a teen.

It would’ve possibly saved me the next 20 years of self medding with drugs and booze and pills while I wasn’t convinced that mental illness could be me.

Oh well.

38 years old and now my meds are placebos and I egotistically speak with therapists.

My wife uses my depression against me to gain advantage sometimes.

My life insurance was revoked due to my honesty about suicide and treatment visits. I agree that opening up causes mucho probs unless that person is also destroyed by depression themselves. Thank u for replying 🙏🙏❤️

[Hidden]

For me,it's gotten better but i def do have tough days,hours,seconds.Once I realised who was gonna be at my side n understand n help,it really relieved me.

Honestly,none but two people truly understood n understand but I don't care anymore n I don't upset myself about it,"I do me",because that's all that matters at the end of the day.

U surround urself with those that will raise u up,not let u sink or drown.

Docs..fired them all n got 2 new ones n dif med direction.

No one has perfect days or perfect lives,so u chalk up a bad day to a life lesson n try ur best the next day,one minute at a time.

It's hope...