Giving this a shot!

[MeDaPea]

Hi, I'm new here, but first of all I would like to say that you all are awesome, and have great strength to come out, and be open with your problems... well here I go... my depression started when I was very young, my mom passed when I was 7, I was physically, sexually, emotionally, and mentally abused from the age of 8 til... longer story shorter, from the age of 25 my support team passed away, my cousin at the age 35, my sister at the age of 39, and in 2015 I watched my husband take his last breath in a car accident which we both were together, I felt bad because I made it out without a scratch... He was 33... As if I wasn't already going through a lot, I have four kids that I had to be strong for... This has been a very big struggle for me, I suffer with depression, anxiety, and PTSD... it gets embarrassing sometimes when I have to explain my conditions to friends, and family that say they understand, but make me feel like there is no hope for me, they have no desire to hang around me for long periods of time, they say things like you'll be ok, or did you do something productive today, did you work out, took your meds, ect... but what I really feel is hard to explain. I don't want to be looked at as if something is wrong with me so I try to fit in, and not give anyone a reason to think I'm different... But at some points, and times I don't even realized when I'm having a moment... I can go on, and on, but I'm really here to see how some of you cope, get help, and be some help to someone if I can... Its hard, and I do feel like giving up sometimes, missing my family that passed, feeling lost after 13 years with my husband so, yea I gave it a shot! Hope this could help someone, or if I can find a support friend for help...

[sweetiepye]

And yet you are still standing. Most people wouldn't understand what that means , how hard you have worked and suffered. You have my respect and I imagine many more on here feel the same.

I try not to share my issues with family and friends. They think they understand but they have no idea, it also seems to put them in a morally superior position.. they know better. Ha.

My greatest help comes from my therapist. It did take awhile to find someone I could trust. Pam

[JP6714]

You are an inspiration and probably one of the strongest people alive. I struggle from childhood trauma but oh my goodness you are the strength that I wish I could have just a piece of. You have survived something dreadful and expected to function not only for yourself but your children and I can’t imagine the strength that you have to have. Reach out to anybody and everybody. Get the supports you need. You will get through this and your husband is looking down on you thinking about how amazing of a woman you are.

[Hidden]

Imagines with my happy childhood play in front of my eyes. When time passed and I grew up I was more and more unhappy, with physical manifestation of depression and anxiety. Today I'm lost in this life, feeling that I missed my purpose somewhere in the road of life. Many of you said that we should concentrate on present not on past but the past is the one which define us and in present we have nothing to like, to love, to enjoy.

[bobscrv]

Well, my personal experience...I had 37 treatments. And I came to the realization that I wasn't getting any benefit. I believe it was helpful for some. But not for me. I feel like I had adverse reactions such as even now, 2 years later, have some declining memory and move slower.