I just want to feel normal

[Bosox34]

I have and amazing family and growing business and I can’t just have a normal day or be happy. It’s scary and I don’t know what to do I don’t know if it’s because I wanted to try to tapper off of my anti depressants or if this is just how I’m gonna have to live every day for the rest of my life. I’m scared and I feel alone even though I know I’m not. I don’t know what to do

[ChicagoGirl1961]

If oh, no one I normal around here...if you figure it out do tell. Lol. Why get off your AD when it appears you need it based on your post? That doesn't add up to me. What am I missing?

[Arniestal]

I don't think it sounds like you are ready to come off meds, like me you should just take them while you need them and consider it later. Concentrate on feeling better first.

[B4andafter]

I think coming off your anti-depressants would be a bad idea and would make you feel worse. Do you also have access to talk therapy with a psychologist or counsellor? That along with medication has a better chance of success. Is it possible that you have set yourself unrealistic expectations of what it would take to make you happy?

[Hidden]

Hey BoSox,

I'm completely with you...we all just want to feel normal. We could get into a deeper philosophical discussion of what is normal and all, but no reason to get into that. While I do hope you're able to feel the original normal that you once had, you may need to adjust to a new normal. I wouldn't cut the medication out yet as it might be what's keeping you from a worse day to day situation. It's frustrating, scary, annoying, and every other word in the book. I absolutely understand when you say you know you have support but you feel alone because we all experience this in different manners.

Based solely on what I experience, you might try some alternatives or things you may even be already applying. Acupuncture has helped me feel the most normal (even for just an hour after). Meditation, mindfulness, CBT, EMDR, and deep breathing can go a long way. Mix in exercise, a good diet, and cutting out some not-so-friendly anxiety contributors like caffeine could ease your woes. Medication doesn't necessarily need to be your solution. My psychiatrist told me they're finding CBT to be as effective as medication, so that's some good news. Finding a therapist who is sympathetic to your cause can help pull the pressure you carry day to day. I've found applying all of the above has me in a much better situation even if it's a lot of work.

I also have a family and a stressful job in a field that demands perfection. I know what it's like to want to be more present for all of those but the difficulties of anxiety and panic can feel like we aren't living up to our end of the bargain. Surely your family understands you're doing the best you can as a father/husband, a bread winner, and taking care of yourself. You're doing the best you can and that's all you can ask. I'd suggest a little self-kindness for what you're going through. I had a post several months ago and it talked about giving ourselves a break and cutting some slack. Try not to worry about the future because the opportunity for a normal day and solutions is a possibility tomorrow. I hope you're able to understand you truly aren't alone even when you feel that you are, let the fears dwindle, and know that normalcy can be restored. It takes time, but you will get there. Best of luck and remember to be kind to yourself.

[PapaDocs]

All the advice given above are excellent in my opinion. And I do agree not to cut your meds prematurely because sometimes when you interrupt it, it is harder to get it going again. I would like to add that perspective can also make a huge difference. You have an amazing family. Some people’s post are about the pain their family gives them. Yours is a great blessing, so enjoy your family and draw energy from the love that they shower you. And then, you have a growing business. There are people with all sorts of job problems. Take it as a blessing as well even though you have to face challenges everyday. But take such challenges as opportunities to grow. So, consider downplaying the worry about the meds if it is helping you. It is a small cost for the benefit you are enjoying now. Just look at your meds as if you are taking vitamins. I know that I am oversimplifying it, but sometimes we just have to look at certain liabilities in a different way to enjoy the better things that we have.