fear of accidents and dying

[jmendo97]

Ive had many of these situations but ill just give one example... I was getting ready in the morning to go to school, and i had straightened my hair. After i was done with everything, I ran my routine of closing and checking the doors in the house. Usually I will do this 3-4 times depending on my thoughts of "did you lock it, did you close it" even though I know I did, I check again and again. So I eventually leave my house and as I get off on the exit to school the thoughts of "did you unplug the hair straightener" start repeating in my head over and over. Then it escalates to "what if its on and its starting to heat up", "what if the house alarm is going off already?", "what if a fire starts and my dogs die?", "what if the house burns down and my family is so angry they disown me?"...etc... I LITERALLY drove all the way back to my house shaking, and rushing just to make sure that I had unplugged the straightener. And whats sad is that deep down I knew I had but the thoughts and fears wouldn't stop, and i couldn't control them.

Has anyone else gone through this?

[EleanorRose]

I have experienced this, in fact, only last week I had to drive home from work to check on something I worried could cause a fire.

I have also experienced lots of similar (but different) things which I don’t want to list to you in case of putting a thought into your head.

These types of thoughts are known as intrusive thoughts - the majority of people have them and they are meaningless and harmless. However, some people give these thoughts meaning, which is what causes the problem.

For example, your intrusive thought might be:

“I left the hair straighteners on and it’s going to cause a fire”

(At that point some people are able to just think “no I didn’t” and move on)

The meaning to you is:

House will burn down, pets will die, family will disown me.

As a consequence you have to do something to make sure that doesn’t come true, in this case, going back to check.

Lots of people have thoughts like this from time to time and worry about this sort of stuff. However, if this is a regular pattern of worrying about things and the thoughts escalating, leading to you needing to check , it might be a good time to talk to someone such as a doctor or therapist. Personally, I have a diagnosis of OCD. Something lots of people have heard of but don’t really know a lot about - you might find it interesting to do a little reading on it - you may find some things you relate to .

You say you’re at school in your message but don’t say how old you are - have you spoken to your parents or other family about how you’re feeling?

Remember, these are just anxious thoughts, they don’t mean anything and can’t hurt you - just because you’ve thought or worried about something doesn’t make it true.

[jmendo97 in reply to EleanorRose]

Im currently finishing up a semester to obtain my bachelors. Im a full time student right now and I dont' have a job, but I also don't have the time to seek a therapist, which i really need to do. Once this semester is done I will make that a priority. I know my health should come first but Im really just trying to cope until then. My uncle, and partner are aware of some of my issues, and they have also encouraged me to seek help, but they don't completely undersand whats going on in my head. Sometimes its hard to just think that these thoughts cant hurt me because they are so intense, but I do appreciate you saying that because I can tell myself that and hopefully ease my worry. It can just be so hard sometimes.

[Linnea1]

Hi, there. I understand this torment well. Eleanor Rose has given you some great feedback and I'd just like to add one thing: how about a checklist of all the things you normally check and fret over, and keeping that list by the door? Before you leave the house, you physically walk to each area that is giving you intrusive thoughts and physically check off each item as you check to make sure it's done. Then, take the completed list with you and, if you have any intrusive thoughts while you're away from home, pull out the list and see that you already checked that item off. At that point, FORGET that thought and focus on what you were doing before the intrusive thought interrupted you. For this, you'll need to make copies of the list, of course.

Also, if behavioral therapy doesn't help you, there are some meds (anti-depressants) that are used off-label for OCD. I hate pushing pills, but they may help you, if other avenues don't. Talk to a doctor and therapist about that.

All the best to you!