No problem in the world that can't be overcome by the application of human thought.

[Jeff1943]

We all have a different threshold to anxiety disorder. And once we get into the vicious circle of fear causing symptoms causing fear causing more symptoms the disorder can become self-perpetuating, the original cause lost and forgotten.

But most of us are only too aware of what's prompting our unquiet mind. Often it's worry for a member of our family. Or a job we hate and working for a boss we loathe. Increasingly everybody is expected to do the work of two people and overwork causes unacceptable stress. Another culprit is money worry and concern about losing our home. Or relationships that have turned toxic with no easy means of escape.

The list is legion but whatever is the cause of our woes there is always an exit plan. Sadly by the time we are diagnosed with anxiety or depression we are too depleted by nervous exhaustion to feel like doing much about it.

But having an exit plan and doing something about it is a must. We must be ruthless in neutralising that which is the cause of our distress. We don't have to put up with s#*t like that forever. Don't we deserve peace of mind like everyone else?

The psychiatrist and writer Claire Weekes, whom I may have mentioned before🤗, had something to say about this. She said we should seek the advice of a wise and trusted friend as sometimes our tired minds don't see straight. It doesn't have to be a friend but someone whose good sense and discretion we can rely on. Maybe a minister of the church, someone we work with or an older relative. Or ask the people on this forum, isn't that what we're here for? Maybe seek out more than one opinion but we must be the judge.

Just having an exit plan gives new hope and can act like a tonic. There are jobs out there where your talents will be better valued. You don't have to live the lives of offspring for them, they'll learn by their mistakes soon enough. Complain about your workload, don't suffer in silence or spend leisure time working to meet fantasy deadlines. Or you can start putting something by for when you make the big break.

Imagine the relief, the weight off your mind, when you solve the insoluble problem. And the joyful release from nervous suffering it will bring. There really is no problem in the world that can't be overcome by the application of human thought.

[Tinkynutbug]

Thank you again your words jump out with rays of hope reminding us there is hope and to not get consumed.

God bless you

Your words matter

Leticia

[Hidden]

Jeff, I wish I could keep you in my pocket reminding me of all this wonderful insight in the middle of my worst days. It would be so helpful!!

[Jeff1943 in reply to Hidden]

AbsoluteDaisies, thank you for your kind words. I read your comment about your blood pressure worries but on the basis of the figures you quote I think you are worrying needlessly.

I was reading a British Heart Foundation booklet yesterday and it confirms that anything up to 140/90 is acceptable. Your figures do not exceed this.

Remember that bp readings can be subject to anxiety even when you're taking the readings yourself.

It's also important to take readings as follows: sit quietly for 5 minutes, not after a meal, keep the arm level with the heart but the arm supported, palm open facing upwards. Take a reading, no talking. Wait 2 minutes and take another reading. Wait another 2 minutes. Take a third and final reading. (You will probably find that the readings become successively lower). Then add the 3 figures together and divide by 3. That is the most reliable way to get a correct reading, this is why some bp meters do the calculation for you.

Try getting a reading that way, I suspect your reading will be even lower than the one-off readings you quoted. It's easy for someone's anxiety to latch on to blood pressure readings and it's easy for us to become obsessive but I don't see that you have a bp problem.

[Hidden in reply to Jeff1943]

Thanks for your thoughtful response Jeff. I discussed this (what I call) obsession over my bp with my therapist last week and we are going to start working through my anxiety related to it. As always, I appreciate reading your words and knowing that others have made a successful life out of what once felt like absolute despair. I’ll keep moving forward in hopes of getting there!

[Hidden]

I really hope you are a writer. The way you word things make perfect sense, soothing and poetic. Thankyou for sharing🤗

[Orangeblossom85 in reply to Hidden]

Very soothing

[Hidden]

I agree with AbsolutDaisies, just reading your words helps restore me to back to calmness!

[Rosesmom]

Thank you, Jeff. I never considered an "exit plan" but the concept has given me new strength. You are amazing.

[Ujjayi]

Beautiful words and wonderfully written. I agree wholeheartedly with the idea of an exit plan. But, what if an exit can't be found? That's what I'm running up against. Everything I try to plan has too many blocks or is not possible for one reason or another.

[Jeff1943 in reply to Ujjayi]

If you cannot see a solution to your problems then you do what you can to mitigate or minimise the problem for yourself and others and await the day when situations change and you see an opening to solve the problems once and for all. This happens.