Depressed

[Exhausted2018]

As I get older I find myself losing the little hope I have left. I find myself struggling to keep moving forward. I try to fight these thoughts and the majority of the time these thoughts win. I tell myself how stupid I am, how ugly I am, how I am in a bad relationship, how ugly my body is , I just lay in bed and don’t wanna do anything, I don’t talk to my friends, I don’t go out , and this goes on and on in my mind.😞

[Lindsey14]

I get how you feel, it isn't fair we have to go through this, im here if you need to talk anytime

[hypercat54]

Hi I totally understand what you mean. I have found what works for me is that every time you have a negative thought like that follow it with a positive one.

Eg I too have the 'ugly' thoughts which I then follow with 'Not bad for an old bird'. I have just crawled out of bed and it's 2 pm. I think how lazy I am then follow this with 'Well done for getting out of bed at all feeling so hellish'. This is hard at first but now I do it automatically. It doesn't half boost your mood so try it. x

[Hidden]

It's sad to hear someone feel so bad about themselves but I think it's common to have such awful perceptions of ourselves. We are our own worst critic and sometimes that critic is absolutely wrong. Getting older is difficult but we all have to adjust. It can be overwhelming and sometimes underwhelming compared to prior "ages" or eras of our life. Keep moving forward because it's a great direction to be going in (save for a fire or natural disasters...not a place for forward). Our thoughts generally win some battles but if you can try a different take or outlook.

You aren't stupid at all. You wrote a piece about your feelings and not once did I think this was by a stupid person. Intelligent and aware, yes. You shared your thoughts and feelings in a support area, so you're doing good things. I don't know what you look like, but it doesn't matter. Again, I think a lot of people look into the mirror and don't like what we see because society places unfair, unhealthy, and fake images of what is "beautiful". I think everyone is a beautiful person and you must be one as well. I'd give yourself a bit of a break. I do have to ask...is someone telling you these things? Is your relationship causing you to feel this way? I truly hope not, but just a thought there.

I understand and can sympathize with the not getting out and living a more outgoing lifestyle. I think once you feel better about yourself and appreciate the unique person that you are, that there is no one else absolutely like you on this entire planet (in a good way), maybe you can see this from a different perspective. Obviously you're on a depression board and I know it's hard to pick yourself up, but I hope you can find some self-love and kindness for yourself. As hypercat mentions, negative thoughts are like sending yourself down the positive mountain whereas positive thoughts pull us from the bottom to the top. I hate sounding corny, but really treasure who you are if and when you can. Can you maybe make a lunch date, a movie, or host a friend and start from there? Sometimes we need what I call the "slump buster".

I do hope you're able to see you're none of the things you think you are. If you truly are unhappy with your body and perhaps want to tone up, put on muscles like Arnold, or whatever, you can do it...hit up gym. There are plenty that promote "no judgement" type safe areas for the self-conscious. I know I feel that way sometimes. If your relationship isn't abusive, perhaps a good counseling session with your significant other? Some good compliments can go a long way. Find some solutions to the way you look and feel. Go spent some money on an outfit that makes you feel awesome. Whatever it takes. Anyway, I don't want to seem to suggestive in a "do this, do that" manner other than I do hope you keep trying, be kind and love yourself, and know you truly are a unique person.