Work? : Sometimes I feel the want to go... - Anxiety and Depre...

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Raiinbow08 profile image

Sometimes I feel the want to go back to work. I’m not dealing very well with being at home all day. I get this sudden feeling that I am not doing anything with my life. I start to panic.

I was so happy at my last job. I had started in March and made it all the way through September. A solid 6 months. I was happy and proud of myself. I would usually not last past the first day on a job. I feel like I stuck to this job though and mostly because I went to school for that career.

So I felt that I needed to show some accountability for all my hard work the past year and a half.

I left that job due to issues with my youngest son.

He would get sick a lot. The daycare where he attended was chosen because it was convenient in all ways possible. It was a 1 minute drive or less to the daycare. We could practically walk there if we wanted to. We moved to this specific location because it was a 10-15 minute drive (depending on traffic) from both of our jobs. All in all it was perfect, close to home, close to daycare, close to everything.

We did check it out before putting him there, don’t get me wrong it wasn’t just something we threw him into. I’m the typical worrisome mother with the all too many questions, overprotective type. It was a 5 star daycare. I was satisfied. Time passed everything was fine and I noticed he started to get sick a lot. More than the normal. He even started having febrile seizures. Three to be exact, which was enough for me to say enough. After the first one we thought it would go away and not happen again. Specially since my first child had been through it as well but just once. I was wrong it happened two times more after that and I feel sad because I had to quit my job which I enjoyed. But my sons health comes first. I feel like part of this is what caused me to regress into my depression and anxiety. I am going to go back to school at night. I have been trying to get back into anything I can job wise, at the moment but haven’t had any luck. Last year in December I had to turn down two jobs, because we couldn’t find daycare. I’m stressed because I feel like I can’t win. I’m trying, but nothing ever works out for me.

3 Replies

I'm sorry to hear that. I'm a mother and we worry because we care, mother nature tells us to protect our offspring! I had to take some time off work last year due to anxiety and depression and I too missed my job. Maybe when your kids are older you can try to get back into the line of work you were enjoying so much. How old is your youngest son? Although it's scary when a child has a seizure, it's quite common and not necessarily serious, surprisingly. Do the doctors know what caused it? Some kids get them when they have a fever, especially when they're little, then just grow out of it naturally. Obviously, doctors need to check it out to ensure it's nothing serious x

Yes we had him checked out and they had no answer for us other than he was sensitive to them and was more prone to them after having had the first one. We were told the same thing as well, that they grow out of them. All of them were due to fevers though, they would spike quickly and seemed to come out of no where. One minute he was fine the next he was sick. Thankfully after pulling him out of daycare in these last few months that he has been at home with me, he has not had another one. So I am happy for that, but would like to get back to work. He is going to be 4 this October.

Anxiety comes without calling sometimes. We go through a traumatic event and suddenly we are in a panic over many things that are uncontrollable. I'm so sorry that your son went through seizures and It sounds like he is doing better. Meanwhile, you are still reeling from all of the unwelcome changes in your life. Perhaps it's best if you stay at home for a while in order to heal from your own trauma. I have been dealing with anxiety for about 15 years and I have my ups and downs. Though I still have bouts with anxiety, I have learned to avoid it most of the time by praying and journaling. I let God know what I'm going through and I write down my feelings on paper. This has really helped me to sort through the crazy thoughts I can get that have no truth or foundation to them. It's important for you to know that your anxiety and depression do not need to rule your life. Give your worries to the Lord and He will give you peace. I'm praying for you!

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