The thoughts that insurance may or may not be renewed
The struggling with bad thoughts
The considering using medication to help my son focus in school
The believing I am ugly and stupid
All of these are floating down the river like leaves rushing over the falls and far away
you know what one of the most damaging thing's is to me...thinking we are less than what others think of us.... your not ugly or stupid....
I beat myself up for so many years because I could not be the beautiful daughter and wear make-up and be a gold digger and find the husband with lots of money, and have the 2 beautiful children out of a model catalogue, and have the big expensive everything.... you know what.... the day I stopped thinking any of that crap matters is the day I looked out over a green field with trees and birds and cats and cows in my back yard and say.... none of that superficial crap matters. I have everything I want...I have everything I need for right now.... and now I'm gonna work on my little painting and think about nothing....all day long.
I like it! I have everything I need for right now. I wish to paint and think about nothing. Sounds sooooooo good.
It's amazing .... I'm a crap painter...but by just blending and brushing the colors on and swirling the brush around the different shapes...it is very therapeutic. It doesn't matter if it's any good or good enough for anyone else's approval....I am happy doing it....and that is a gift. Those blue days shadow to many of my days,...and I'm trying something I have not done in a very long time....art... because it makes me happy.....
Awe.some! I’m soooo very happy for you that you’ve got your art back! Keep it up!
Fauxartist that sounds like fun & very therapeutic. And your yard sounds beautiful & peaceful... worth more than expensive things. I'm glad you know you are rich is what matters.
I am letting go of my critical self so I can just be. I am letting go of dissecting things so they will just be. Be and let be.
Let Go
