I don’t feel like I’m good enough - Anxiety and Depre...

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I don’t feel like I’m good enough

littleorange8 profile image
10 Replies

So some of you may know my ex ended our 5 year relationship (which is partly a good thing because i had endured his emotional abuse and unfaithfulness all throughout).

But I feel like a failure. I was supposed to be in medical school by now, but being with my ex lowered my GPA (I’m doing grade repair in a second program right now). I feel like I have let my parents down - they never forced me to be a doctor, but I wanted to save people since I was a child and I wanted them to be proud of me while I did it.

Most of my friends have jobs and are renting their own place already. I’m still living at home, depressed about the breakup. I feel useless. Even worse, my ex told me i’m the worst girlfriend ever and he is already seeing other people.

I feel like nothing good will ever happen. I don’t know what I’m living for. What can I do?

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littleorange8 profile image
littleorange8
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10 Replies
Krazie profile image
Krazie

Being in an abusive relationship leaves one feeling worthless and not good enough. Isn't it the point of abuse to make the victim feel this way? You need to stop listening to your ex-boyfriend. He has torn you down, and now he has moved onto his next victim. I suggest you seek counseling pronto. Professional help can help guide you out of the pit you are in, and help provide ways to prevent you from getting into this same situation, again. You can move away from this temporary glitch in your life, reorient yourself, and move forward, to be the person you are meant to be.

I wish you all the best. :)

What an a**. Who tells an ex that?

fauxartist profile image
fauxartist

hello littleorange....glad to see you again.... hey....forget about not feeling good enough...your studying medicine....that takes some smarts ...I know....I was Biological science,(pre-med)/ceramic art major in college...that's the hardest subject matter next to physics and math pal. Your more than good enough.... there is no failure...just an opportunity on now knowing what you don't want to be treated like in a relationship. Never let anyone take your power away. Get your grades back up, and stay out of relationships for a while, they don't define you....get your degree....live a life opportunity that only a handful could ever have. Take it one step at a time getting your life on track...if there is counselling at school...go....tell them you need help with grief and loss and letting go....and want to work on your self reliance and independence. Nobody can make you happy or un-happy unless you let them. Let yourself be happy, once you get busy busy with this work in school....you will start to move off from this....

littleorange8 profile image
littleorange8 in reply tofauxartist

i finished life science with a 2.3 GPA (what else can you expect if you had a boyfriend who puts you down every day and you were too stupid to leave). now i’m away from him, in nursing with a 3.7 GPA (however I find nursing hardly challenging enough for me, and I really can’t spend my life doing simple work like this).

I’m thinking of taking extra classes to do grade repair for my low life science courses. However I’m just always worrying what if I never get into medical school? I really can’t imagine myself doing anything else.. My ex (who is in occupational therapy) also contacted me recently and said I won’t get into medical school because I’m not smart enough.. and that I’ll be “just a nurse”.

fauxartist profile image
fauxartist

Nursing is a very honorable profession that can actually pay very well....my sister is a nurse. And if you get a PRN which is a nurse practitioner....that's even more pay and opportunity. Medical school is long and then longer. If you already have a GPA of 3.7 in nursing...with the 4 yr. degree plus I think it's a 1 yr. intern-ship....your set for life and you don't have to worry about getting into medical school.

littleorange8 profile image
littleorange8 in reply tofauxartist

But nurses don’t get to perform surgery or make diagnoses by themselves (?).. which is what I’d like to do.

I think a part of the reason behind med school is also that I want to finally prove to my ex that I can be better than him. I won’t have to worry about which girl he is with anymore because I’d know i’m the best.. All the times he told me i’m not successful enough for him will be wrong. He also looks down on nurses..

fauxartist profile image
fauxartist in reply tolittleorange8

then go for it girl....only thing holding you back is not doing it....

purposelife profile image
purposelife

Sorry you are dealing with this. Sounds like he did you a favor by ending the relationship. You seem like an awesome person wanting to help others. Try not to be so hard on yourself. It's great that you are getting back on track with school. I know it can be hard when you feel that others around you are doing so much better. I think many of us are guilty of comparing ourselves to others. All of us are different and unique. No one can be a better you, than you. Blessings, take care!

Orangeblossom85 profile image
Orangeblossom85

Please little Orange - read this book i once told you. It will help you a lot. It’s called psychopath free

babygirl1952 profile image
babygirl1952

I just Had to respond to you I left my x for the numerous amounts of time you would think I would learn that the abuse but that's not the reason I never would have seen my sons again your lucky you got soon my lasted 38 years that's why im so messed up I tried so many times to kill myself but I can't anymore I finally got help in a good way im sorry I didn't mean to come on so hard I hope everything works out for you God Bless

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