I'm New...And I Don't Know What's Wrong With Me.

[Cora_Lacy12]

Hi, I'm new here, and for a while I've been looking for a free support group, but, I guess this is okay too. For a while, it feels like I only have room to feel one of three things; anger, sadness, and horny. When I'm not crying, I'm raging, and when I'm not raging, I'm asking my boyfriend if he's in the mood. I've tried reading books that I usually find great comfort in but, they just make me feel sad again. I've been waiting this out for weeks and nothing is changing. I don't know what to do. I've never felt like this before. I get that most you probably can't tell me what's wrong either, I just... I just needed to tell someone who doesn't think I'm going crazy.

[Hidden]

Hello

Have you had yourself checked by a doctor.?

Have you tried any other things besides reading books etc?

This is a great place, ask questions, read other posts and make friends. We will listen.

[Cora_Lacy12 in reply to Hidden]

No, I haven't thought about asking a doctor. I don't really have the money for it, and I'm scared to tell my mom, because I know she's going to ask why I'm feeling this way, and when I say 'I don't know', I'm scared that she'll say or my stepdad might say to wait it out, or worse. They'll think I'm making it up. I'm not sure if any of that is true, but, it's always been a fear of mine. When I tell my parents (the ones I live with right now), that they'll say we'll talk about it later or, say we'll look into it but, sweep it under the rug.

Sorry, I know that's a lot but, I'm kind of spewing right now

[Hidden in reply to Cora_Lacy12]

It's hard to figure things out sometimes, but stick around someone might be going through the same thing as you are and they might be able to help you.

[fauxartist]

crying is an outlet, raging is suppressed anger, and sex is a quick fix for all these feelings. Have you talked to a therapist or are you on any medications for depression....you say this is a more recent feeling....was there something that happened that may have triggered this....I'm sorry your going through all of this....these are nice people here, I'm glad your sharing about what your going through....

[dukenu]

Welcome to the group. I can't say whats wrong with you, but I think you have a clue...anxiety and depression go hand in hand so its not unusual for people to go through mood swings. Dr.'s will tell you that its all about an imbalance in chemicals in the brain and give you a prescription, and that helps many. Exercise and diet also have a lot to do with it. Learning to think differently (CBT) is my preferred method along with exercise. Don't beat yourself up, thinking "whats wrong with me" and many similar thoughts are not the byproduct of depression...it IS the depression--each thought coexists with a feeling--when the feeling that goes along with the thought is sad, mad or whatever emotion, then the HABIT of thinking the same things, will produce the same emotional state. So to fix it, you need to start to think different things. Distraction (or the practice of thinking about things that have either positive emotions connected to them, or at least neutral emotions that give you a break from angry or sad emotions) should be the goal. For me, it was getting into youtube videos where people go on signing contest...I found the back stories and the emotions of people pursuing their dreams really interesting and it held my attention with positive emotions that gave me a break from my own life and all the negative in my head. I also took up my childhood hobby of photography...I learned and practiced everyday, looked at youtube videos and edited my images. I joined a meetup group to go out and meet people and do photography. Kept me busy doing and living things rather than just thinking about my depression and anxiety. I Slowly replaced that broken record in my head that could only think about sad things. Hope that gives you some insight and helps. Good luck.

[fauxartist in reply to dukenu]

Am I understanding that you don't think depression is a chemical imbalance in the brain, and that by just changing the way you think will cure your depression. I do know you can re-route your neurons by learning new ways to do things, and by changing your thought patterns is what is now encouraged with those that may be at risk for Alzheimers, to help combat the on set or rapid progression of this disease. But I don't know if sheer will power and positive thinking can replace Serotonin in the brain.

[AllTimeLow in reply to dukenu]

Great comment!

[vinman12]

Hi Cora welcome, I joined yesterday, I have allot of anger and sadness myself, and like mentioned by occuping your mind with things you like does take some edge off, for me just from posting in here and reading others stories does make the time past and help somewhat, my story is I'm angry because I have not learned to accept my way of living with this anxiety and depression, so I still try to be my old self the happy one, but as the day goes on it hits me hard that I'm not that guy anymore and that's when I get so angry and depressed, so by coming here or other things during the day really does help even when I go to my Dr and talk about it I get a little relife.

I hope you get through this and I would talk with others if and when you can.

[hypercat54]

Glad you think this is ok for you!

Why do you have to tell your parents about it if you think they won't understand? Are you working and can you save up for treatment? If you are not a minor you can take yourself for treatment without anyone else having to know. How old are you? x

[mitch404]

Hi. You don’t indicate in your post your age, but have you thought about free peer counseling groups? I imagine they’re available in your community for all ages.

[Hidden]

I think it takes a few posts to be able to explain but keep talking and maybe you will have more clarity. So many people here to talk to. Peace.

[Sandyxoxx]

Your not crazy !!