I hope I’m not the only one that does this, but anyhow here is my story.
I suffer from moderate, sometimes severe anxiety and depression. Have for many years. But I do a very good job hiding it because of the stigma that comes with it. Even my wife of 22 years doesn’t know the full extent of my issues. I almost always wear a smile, seem calm and collected. On the inside is a completely different story.
I hide just how bad it is from everyone because I grew up in a family where the worst thing you can do is show weakness. And I guess I’m just afraid that if folks knew how I really feel on the inside, I would be perceived as weak.
So anyhow, what my family and some friends know is that I take “happy pills” and everything is fine otherwise. They think I’m fine because that’s what I want them to think. I work very hard to keep it that way. Meanwhile the shit just keeps building and building and I know sooner or later something is going to trigger an eruption, but I really don’t know how else to do this.
Anybody else out there work hard to hide what’s inside?