With no shame whatsoever I’m on medications for depression and anxiety. I must say they have helped save my life from being miserable.
Then there’s “Medicating.” That is, instant fixes that temporarily feel good but wear off not so long after. The type of Medicating I’m writing about is shopping for items that seem attractive but I really don’t need.
For example, I bought a new laptop a few months ago. It seemed so attractive and powerful. Yet the laptop I already had was good enough. I felt that “rush” when the new laptop arrived. But after it was all set up, a few days later the rush wore off and the depression returned.
So I’m making a new commitment I would like to share with everyone: I will only buy things that I actually need, such as groceries, household items, etc. Big ticket items that I don’t need, I do not want to buy to “Medicate.”
I’ve learned if there truly is a positive way to “Medicate,” it’s meeting other people that are friendly, empathetic and supportive, such as this site.
Thank you for being here and for your support.
Best,
MZ
Written by
MrZee
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How did you do it ? Sobriety ? I am struggling because I am on medications for depression and anxiety but crave alcohol for numbness. Although lately it's more of lethargy and anger..but I can't seem to stop for even a whole day, afraid of feeling or not even knowing what I should feel like in the first place.
I’m also on anxiety medication Xanax and will be starting a new antidepressant in a week when my Shrink gets back in town. I look at it this way I’ll take Xanax as needed like a diabetic takes insulin when needed. Yes I’m also diabetic. As far as purchasing items , I find myself on amazon every night buying stuff. Were all looking for that feel good feeling but it last 24 hours and I need that fix again. It could be worse people do a lot worse things to get that fix.
They call that retail therapy. It’s like any other drug. You get a taste and start chasing the high. Kudos to you for recognizing it. I too am guilty of retail therapy. Like you I have set limits and seek healthier ways.
I relate to that. I slowly stopped entering sites like Amazon, nowdays I don't even remember anymore, unless I really need something. But I still strugle with food, I medicate myself and minutes later It's not enough anymore. I'm trying to keep away of unhealthy products and similar recipes.
I'm happy with this new accomplishment of yours. I wish you the best.
Thank you Agora1. It’s a day at a time for me. I have my ups and my downs. But I truly cherish the ups. I’ve learned at my age that “ups” may last only for a fleeting moment which means I do what I can to enjoy the moments when they do occur.
MrZee what a wonderful post! I buy clothes and craft supplies all the time. I probably return more than I actually keep. I'm suprised Walmart hasn't banned me from returning things. And I always buy sizes that are really too large. It's a way of trying to make myself invisible, hidden under my clothes. But I recently shopped with a dear friend who told me to stop. Buy the right size and wear it proudly. He was right. We went to dinner that night and I felt good about myself. So now it's time to purge my clothes. A friend recently lost a lot of weight so the XL shirts I've been hiding under will go to her. Other things will go to charity. No matter how I feel or what others think and say I am working on my self esteem. I am pretty, have a good heart and shall only wear what makes me feel good. Anyone who can't see me for who I am doesn't deserve my time.
I also want to thank all of the amazing people here. You have helped when I needed it most and you understand.
What a lovely reply! Yes, how we see our own image and how we present ourselves for others to see us means a lot.
I like when I feel that I have an over abundance of clothes I can donate them to charity. When I see their happy faces when I walk in with a ton of clothes to give, it warms my heart.
I dress very simply yet cleanly which gives me the image of looking and feeling comfortable.
Let’s say If I had a choice between an average $50 men’s suit that fits me perfectly vs a $500 designer label suit, I’ll always opt for the bargain one. Years ago I went to my work’s XMAS party, I couldn’t get over there was some guy there bragging about the $1,000 suit he was wearing. I was floored thinking that if this is all this person has to talk about, he must be pretty damn shallow. My outfit that night was brought to you by Target and it still looked nice. Why brag about what I spend on expensive clothes or anything else expensive? There’s better things in life to talk about.
It all circles back to the saying, “Feeling comfortable within our own skin.”
A $1000 suit is in my opinion just a waste of money. My wardrobe comes from Ebay, Walmart and second hand stores. I am comfortable, frugal and try to be practical. The things I bought with my friend were from H and M. $74 for a pink denim jacket and 3 shirts that make me feel amazing and that was a splurge. Can't wait to go through what I don't wear and give it away. Don't shop at target much. It's out of my way. Keep being comfortable in your own skin my friend and enjoy donating. What we give away is truly a treasure to others.
Thank you Mrspjsmom. You and I are birds of a feather with our wardrobes. I’m a mile from a Target which is why most of my clothes are from there.
Sifting and donating clothes (or other item) is empowering. Purging is letting go. Donating is warming someone else’s heart in need which in turn enriches our own self esteem.
In my humble opinion the more we empathize, the more compassionate we are.
Thanks. You are right and since I'm stuck inside purging is on my list. I grew up in a very poor home. Often hungry, few clothes so I know the value of donating. We wouldn't have had Thanksgiving or Christmas dinners without donations. For most of my adult life I have done my best to pay back the kindness I recieved as a child. That's probably also why I refuse to buy expensive clothing. I almost passed out when I saw the price of my daughters prom gown. But that along with the accessories she wore left the house years ago. I asked her first and she didn't seem thrilled but I did it anyways. She moved out, left them here and didn't pay for them so too bad. She'll get over it. Was able to donate them to the school she went to. Students in a home economics class alter the dresses for those who need them. And the silver bag she carried was given to a young lady who couldn't afford to buy one. It has been passed down to her younger sisters and even her Mom uses it for special occasions. Not bad for an $8 bag I bought on Ebay 😊 so I keep giving and am happy I am in a position to do it now.
I’d say you’ve more than won the Humanitarian Award.
Some of the most giving people are the most wealthy. And “wealthy” I don’t mean money.
When my Mother was alive, financially she was quite comfortable. Yet she gave to numerous charities. She worked at a food bank. She would peer counsel the poor. She cooked meals for those who were ill. And into her early 80s delivered for Meals on Wheels.
I’ve inherited my mother’s sense of giving to others. After she passed, I had inherited several pieces of her jewelry. So what are these pieces going to do? Sit in a box forever? I work at a community college and have made some good friends that have shown me such kindness and humanity. I gave each one of them a piece of Mom’s jewelry. They were blown away that I would do such a thing! I said, “Look, it’s either this piece sits in a box for eternity or it goes to a good home where the person will appreciate the piece who also possesses the kindness that my Mother did.” I have no regrets for passing on her jewelry. It’s now in a place where it will be cherished.
Finding that balance between reward yourself and "medicating" is a tough one for me. And I "medicate" in all sorts of ways. But I call them unheathly coping mechanisms.
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