i'm new here just talking about cutting and religion and stuff

[Frediano]

gotta write this before I lose the nerve. so I'm super Catholic and i went to confession and told the priest i cut myself because that's a mortal sin I think and it felt super awkward and he told me i had to talk with someone about it that it was anxiety coming out or something so now I feel like that's possibly part of the penance and I can't like go to confession with a clear conscience knowing i didnt really do what the priest asked so now imma talk about it.

so the first time i cut myself it was like barely even i scratch like i doubt it drew blood-- it was over this scar on my hand i got when i was in the back of a well that's off topic anyhow it reminds me of my dad and i've always thought scars were cool and it helps me tell left from right-- the scar i mean-- so i scraped it. and then i remember later on when i was depressed-- like the weird numb kind of depressed im starting to find out that i think there are different types of depression-- anyway yeah i was visiting my dad which was sad and depressing and evertime i started getting scared that id get too depresed i reassured myself that i knew how to dealt with it because for some reason using hese weird jewlery tweezer things to get blood from the scar on my hand made me feel better. ive heard that cutting's about control so maybe that's it.

anyways so i didn't do it for a while and then one time i just felt so fucking weird i hope this sit is okay with swearing-- but year like i was numb and also like in complete emotional turmoil at the same time and the stupid thing is there wasnt really any reason i geuss maybe i was lonely idk it was months ago but yeah i used a thumb tack and just drew it across the scar on my hand and then the scar really did bleed just a little and it fucking scared me cuz it's like when did i turn into a cutter wtf and i stopped and just curled in my bed and did nothing even tho i probably had a lot of studying to do.

okay so the last time- i think it was the last time- i took this safety pin needle andjust drove it under my skin and it barely drew blood but it hurt and i wasnt even that sad like ug.

anyway yeah i really hope this counts as talking to someone about it pls someone respond. sorry if this isn't how the website works i just had to put this out here somewhere before i lost my nerve

[lovetodance2018]

I am so sorry you are struggling with cutting yourself. Yes, it is good that you are reaching out on this forum but you should get professional help too. This group bit.ly/2DS3v7S provides counseling online and can help you to dealing with your struggling and why you are cutting. My daughter struggled for a time with cutting. Through counseling she learned she was cutting because she was keeping her things bottle up, frustration, feeling out of control, etc. and cutting was the way she believed she felt better and had control. She also learned through strategies how to cope with things without cutting herself.

Please seek professional help. Also know you are not alone. Everyone on this forum understands your struggles and are here for you...no judgement. Just love and concern for you. I will be praying for you and please let us know how you are doing. Hugs! 💕

[dee_bells]

Hi Frediano, I’m sorry that you’re cutting yourself. I don’t know anything about cutting but I think it’s diverting the real pain that you feel, in my opinion.

I sleep all the time. That’s my problem. I’m missing out on life.

I believe that you need to reach out to a therapist or psychiatrist. I’m so glad you’re here and never be afraid to post anything to this group. Take care of you and we’re here for you.

[Hidden]

Priest aren't usually qualified to give medical advice are they?

Go to a doctor.

Question.. How come your God doest help you?

[BonnieSue in reply to Hidden]

This is an extremely unhelpful response. You should direct your question to a website constructed to answer questions of faith like this but not a person coming here to have their own questions answered.

[hypercat54]

healthunlocked.com/anxiety-...

[Hidden]

Hi I'm Catholic too.Forgiveness isn’t earned by doing penance; penance done shows ones gratitude to God for forgiveness, and to Jesus for forgiving our sins through His death. Please do t let your difficulty keep you from the sacrament ! Yes this counts, but Fathers point was probably that you get some professional help. I recomend a psychiatrist for meds and a psychologist ( PhD not a social worker or counselor) .

Please don t be afraid to seek help. If you have questions I'll be glad to help you

[b1b1b1]

I think the priest gave you very good advice and you should follow it.

[Frediano]

thanks for all the replies/advice this whole thing is surprisingly comforting