No love

[Jackierivas2011]

I have felt unloved and unwanted since before birth

[Agora1]

Why do you feel that way Jackie? Where you told by your mother that it was an unplanned birth? Were you mistreated as an infant? Where would those feelings come in a fetal stage?

You are a mother yourself aren't you? What are your feelings towards your child? I know these are a lot of questions, but you seem to be hurting bad. You mentioned "No Love" several times. Would it help you to talk about those feelings? I'm sure there are many who can relate. We are here for each other. Maybe we can comfort you. xx

[Jackierivas2011 in reply to Agora1]

Sady my mom told me I was not planned and she was on birth control. I was always mistreated by most of my sibling. I was molested by broty. Actually he even forced himself into me.

[Agora1 in reply to Jackierivas2011]

Oh Jackie, I am so sorry. Nobody deserves to be mistreated and disrespected My heart breaks for you. Was your mother aware you were molested? You need to seek professional counseling. This has made a big impact on your life. You may not be able to leave it in the past but you do need to work through the feelings and your self esteem and self worth.

We care for each other on this forum. We may be strangers but we have more empathy then others who know you. I hope it helps some to not feel alone and to know someone is always here to listen when you are hurting, when you need a listening ear. xx

[Jackierivas2011 in reply to Agora1]

Aww thanks! My parents don’t know what my brother did to me. And they think what my sibling did was normal but it made me hate myself

[Agora1 in reply to Jackierivas2011]

Oh Jackie, this is such a deep issue that needs to be addressed by a professional. I don't have the expertise in this area but I will support you the best I can. You did nothing wrong, you have nothing to be ashamed of. You have been bombarded from all sides. This may be the time for family therapy to sort all this out in allowing everyone to own up to their mistakes in what they did to you. Know that I care xx

[Jackierivas2011 in reply to Agora1]

Thank you so so much... I feel it is my fault because I didn’t say no but I

didn’t know how to say no. It felt wrong but I was too young to know the difference between right and wrong. My parents never talked to us.

[Agora1 in reply to Jackierivas2011]

Of course you were too young Jackie. You were taken advantage of, the responsibility goes to the abuser.

[fauxartist in reply to Jackierivas2011]

NORMAL!!!....what kind of parent would think letting a brother rape a sister is normal....you need to get professional help for you...and find out what to do to dissociate yourself from that kind of sick thinking on your family's part...I was molested by two family members....and it destroyed me for the majority of my young adult life....first off and foremost....get help now....don't wait like I did and live a life of hell because of it.

[Jackierivas2011 in reply to fauxartist]

Wow! Thanks

[Jltucker]

Dearest Jackie, It is 4:00 am and I am laying here awake as usual. I joined this sight but seldom post but after reading your post my heart was touched and I felt compelled to tell you that YOU ARE WORTH LOVING AND YOU ARE LOVED

by people who don’t even know you. No judgements here!! I know people don’t want to be “preached” to and I apologize if I offend you, I just want to say one thing. The same Almighty God that created this entire universe thought that YOU were so special that in spite of birth control HE created an AMAZING & WONDERFUL PERSON and HE LOVED YOU SO MUCH HE DIED FOR YOU. In my book that makes you pretty darn special!! And that my PRECIOUS FRIEND is LOVE!!

Ok, sermon over!! Seriously I don’t mean to belittle your feelings. I am a Christian and I struggle with some of those same issues. Try telling yourself several times a day that you are worth loving yourself and love from others. I will keep you in my prayers. You can never have too many of those. You ARE loved precious one❤️ Nana J

[Jackierivas2011]

Amen! Thank you so so much. I’m w Christian as well so I love your words

[Lyn842]

First of all, God loves you all the time you were in the womb until this day. I'm sorry you feel so unloved. You need to start looking in the mirror and saying, "I am loveable." You need positive affirmations repeated daily till you start believing them. It may take quite awhile but it will help. Just Google positive affirmations. Write the ones you like and need to hear and repeat them everyday, even several times a day. Write them down and stick them up places so you see them. You are worthy of love. You have to start believing that in yourself! Hugs

[Want2BHappy3]

Hi Jackie, too bad you feel that way, are you talking about your parents, friends? I know how you feel,my mom was not happy about having a daughter so much so that she would not celebrate my birthday or tell me happy birthday. I would tell strangers it was my birthday,she would tell them i wasn't supposed to be born. She'd have parties for my brothers. We never got along till we had a break through when I was about 23. She gave me my first birthday cake, it's remained rocky since off and on, she's 88 now with dementia.

Her never showing me any love never stopped me from doing what I had to do in life. I a conscious decision that I would not be like her. I make sure I celebrate my kids birthdays every year and tell them that I love them. love yourself, give yourself something that no one else will. Don't let that stop you from living. Know your Worth.

[Want2BHappy3]

Jackie just read the other emails and WOW, so sorry that happened to you, now it makes sense why you feel that way. Like others said get counseling, as far as your brother, it was WRONG and not your Fault, but maybe someone had molested him? I read that sometimes kids act out to others in the same way that happened to them? SHAME on your mom for feeling that way. I hope you don't let this define you? You deserve to be HAPPY, you can't change the past, but claim to have a BETTER FUTURE... your the only ONE who can make it HAPPEN. We're here for you 🙂🙏