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Anxiety and Depression Support
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Social Anxiety

What are some helpful tips you can share on dealing with social anxiety? I worry way too much about what others think and I’m always trying to please others. Tonight there was a dinner party where all my friends got together at a restaurant. The whole time my legs where shaking but my husband said he thought I did really well and I seemed calm. Inside though I felt like a mess. Then at a certain point the conversation turned and all eyes were on me. My husband said I seemed especially great at that time but inside my thoughts were buzzing like I could barely think. The thing is I like socializing but I do better one on one than in big groups. My biggest thing is I wish I wasn’t so hard on myself about social connections but I am. The end of the dinner I should’ve been rejoicing that I made it through but instead I was being hard on myself that I didn’t say the rights things enough to certain people who were talking to me. So, any helpful information you know on dealing with social anxiety would help. Thanks in advance!

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Probably most social anxiety stems from wanting people to like us. But we can't MAKE them like us - all we can control is our end of things! So, concentrate on that, because it's a waste of time to worry about anything else. Be polite and considerate, treat them as you would like to be treated, and you should have no problem.

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Just keep on keeping on. Trust your husband's observations: if he says you did well at the dinner party, you did and let it go. Don't over think anything.

Just keep on keeping on. The more you socialize as well as you did at this dinner party, the easier it will become for you. If you hit a difficult point, focus on another person and ask questions and listen for as long as that person wants to talk. Every sales and diplomate will agree that's a key to a successful social situation........everyone loves to talk about her/his life to someone who acts interested and listens. :)

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It's impossible to say all the right things, people often say the wrong thing, even those who don't suffer from anxieties, so be kind to yourself, working to hard on pleasing others is draining, and regardless of how hard you try, you can never please everyone you meet, as long as your kind and genuine, those qualities are the ones most people admire :-) xxxx

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