hopefully someone can relate? (I'm new)

I've been so scared and anxious about having a life... sounds ridiculous but I've just been in a constant battle with myself i dont seem to have any social skills and i lack confidence i guess that's what happens when you're home schooled by an agoraphobic mother didn't really have a chance... I'm now an adult & I have no idea how to make friends because I've been so disconnected from the outside world and i am literally shaking at the thought of working because i'm scared i'll be terrible at any job because i feel so anxious & I just don't have any confidence whatsoever. what do i do here? i feel like i cant work until i learn how to communicate with humans i'm OK on the internet but in reality if someone tries to start a conversation with me I freeze.... like no words come out I don't know why or how this happens but it does i want to talk i just can't... any suggestions?

3 Replies

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  • Oh I'm really sorry for both you and your mum - she tried her best and sounds like a great mom. I smile politely and try to come up with good questions - " I like your name! How is it spelled? What's it's origin? ... 2) Where in town do you live? How long have you lived here? 3) What's your family like? (Be careful with this one as family can be a bit of a land mine) 4) Where do you/did you go to school? Are you doing what you love yet or what do you do for a living/ where do you work or would you like to work ? 5) do you have any pets? 6) what's the latest movie you've seen? 7) favorite book? -

    in essence- focus on the other person and if you have an exit strategy that also helps. I loved meeting/ getting to know you better. We should get lunch sometime or I'd love to have you over for dinner (whatever you're comfortable with) but I need to get going because I told my mom I'd be there by x or I need to get some errands done.

  • Thank you :)

  • Try practicing. Break through your fear. I made myself get up and speak. Now, I want to do more speaking. Don't hide...the fear just seems and feels bigger than reality is. Give yourself the permission to have setbacks and make mistakes. That's human. The practice and facing fears, make them so much smaller. Best to you.

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