Sometimes I just feel like the sky is falling in. I did have a good counseling session today. And once home, I even paid two bills - my student loan and my car. I am having a hard time finding out how to pay hospital, and COBRA insurance. I'm pretty much behind in everything but if I can just make some payments, I can stay afloat and get the collection people off of my case.
Today, kind of uncovered that the biggest lie I tell myself is that if I feel happy/good, something bad will happen. And the other thing is that I got so anxious about a dog barking at me that I couldn't sleep for two days. I know how irrational I was being but I honestly could not sleep. I just wanted someone to hear me - and hopefully someone understands.