15+ year Panic disorder, now pregnant

[JerseyGirl83]

For over 15 years, I have suffered with depression, anxiety, and panic attacks with agoraphobia at several points in time. I found success and life again a few years ago when I began taking Effexor XR with a PRN dose of 1mg of Ativan. On that combination, I was able to attend nursing school, get on a plane, drive over bridges, and conquer nearly all of my long held phobias. I moved to a new state, left a bad marriage, and worked an entire year with minimal attendance issues related to anxiety and depression (we sufferers miss work/ obligations).

Recently I found a new love and became pregnant in an untimely manner. This is a tough situation in and of itself, but to compound the matter, pregnancy has completely rendered my medications ineffective. Really, it feels like I am back to square one and I've quit my job, done an inpatient stay, and am feeling awful on a daily basis. I am so out of whack that I'm considering having an abortion even though I'm 34 and childless and this may be my last chance to have my own biological children. I'm just feeling like I cannot function as an individual. How can I be a mother? Everyone says it's the pregnancy hormones, but this is severely impacting my ability to care for myself.

Any insight or advice would help as to how to get back on track would be greatly appreciated. I don't know if it's even possible at this point keeping the baby or terminating it to feel better. Has anyone else had a backslide in their recovery and then regained success? I feel so lost.

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Hang in there. I suffer from childhood serial abuss, a tragic car accident and severs fear of thunderstorms. Iost two babies so was happy to be pregnant again. But with anxiety and depression I will not lie it is very difficult but the best gift I have ever had. Now I have something to live for and be my best for. She brings me the only joy I have ever felt. If you abort the you have to live with that forever. Adoption. May be a better option. Children are the greatest blessing and will really put things in perspective. Good luck to you.

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Im not sure if this is a option but what about either outpatient care for remainder of pregnancy or inpatient? A person I met (while inpatient myself)with bipolar disorder and severe anxiety did in patient - they were able to help her. I know for me it would be devastating to have to make that choice. But if you had daily monitoring and support, it might help. I would think you'd need to be weaned off some of the medicine anyways. Do you have other support right now?