Preliminary report on Psilocybin trip? - Advanced Prostate...

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Preliminary report on Psilocybin trip?

spencoid2 profile image
46 Replies

Today I did a guided Psilocybin trip. I followed all the pre-trip instructions and had a guide for 6 hours. A preprogrammed musical tape was played.

So far I am underwhelmed with the results but who knows. I had the main "intention" of coming to grips with earlier death than I had previously planned for.

The musical program was good but maybe masked subtle things that were going on that I missed. I ended up taking about 7 grams of mushrooms which should have provided a pretty vivid trip?

I had taken a small does of mushrooms about a month ago so maybe this effected the current trip. I know it is not good to repeat in short time but thought a month after a small does was not a problem.

I am nauseous most of the time, from chemo etc, and have just dealt with it but decided to take one of the prochlorperazine pills that was prescribed to be sure I did not puke the mushrooms. Maybe this was a mistake. I can not find anything about interactions online but ???

Maybe my dreams tonight will be revelatory?

46 Replies
noahware profile image
noahware

It's been about forty years since I've had any experience with psychedelics. But the nature of my individual experiences, good or bad, seemed to depend not just on what was going on during the trip but on my state of mind going into the trip. As I felt both were beyond my control, I stopped tripping with friends... they were having a good time EVERY time and I was not!

It seems possible that your concepts, intentions and expectations may be overwhelming the "letting go" power of the drug. You seem to be approaching the experience as a tourist might approach a trip when he has a preconceived schedule of every sight he wants to see, along with expectations of how he will experience and enjoy each sight. Maybe better to kick those to the side and let the trip take you where IT wants to take you? (Because, you know, wherever you go... there you are.)

Another idea would be to do some reading and try to get a thought-based or intellectually oriented approach to possible spiritual meanings of realizing earlier death than previously planned for. Authors like Ram Dass, Eckhart Tolle, Anthony de Mello, etc. can provide a foundation for "new" (old, really) ways to think about human consciousness and existence.

Even if you don't buy what they are selling as you read, while in your normal state of consciousness, the next time you go on a trip things might click. You might then experience some sort of "enlightenment" rather than just reading about it, and have an ah-ha moment. But then again, you might not... you might stay stuck in the words and concepts, because that is what our Western minds like to do!

As with the tourist, reading about the mountain is not the same as having the experience of BEING ON the mountain. Perhaps during your trip you actually were on the mountain, but your mind was occupied with the guidebook's list of all the great things a trip to the mountain can bring?

spencoid2 profile image
spencoid2 in reply to noahware

my guess is that the continuous musical program masked what might have been going on at a deeper level. i do not listen to music as background. When i listen to music i listen deeply for all the subtleties. I think i will try it again on my own in a few months. We have a bunch of mushrooms we recently bought and also the process of growing them sounds like my kind of thing.

I think a book that helped me with the death issue was "How We Die" I also read "how We Live" by same author

amazon.com/How-We-Die-Sherw...

noahware profile image
noahware in reply to spencoid2

Thanks for the link... I will check that author out.

The authors I mentioned would be coming at what "me" actually means for a human being. Or as some have asked, are we human beings having a spiritual experience or are we spiritual beings having a human experience?

What you said about music is interesting, because when I listen to music it often can become an intellectual exercise where I am analyzing the music and THINKING about how it was composed, what the structure is, what instruments there are and what the lyrics mean, etc. This compared to when I was a young child and always just heard and FELT the music without any analysis, letting the music create images and moods and emotions.

Same with the psychedelic trip: the "bad" ones involved more thinking (and worrying) while the "good" ones were more about feeling (and just being) without trying to analyze or understand the experience.

This is what I enjoy about alcohol. It can relax the thinking (and worrying) part of my brain and liberate the "just being" part. Unfortunately it is also habit-forming and tends to work less well than desired when consumed too frequently or in too great a quantity. And booze has NEVER given me a truly transformational "not-me-anymore" experience the way tripping has. It is more of a "still-me-but-a-relaxed-me" experience, which is good but is not about to change the way I view life, death, and human existence in general.

A good trip to me is one where my ego mostly dissolves, but what is left of my ego is not at all worried that the rest of it is gone. A bad trip is when my ego gets worried and afraid about being disturbed and tries to amplify itself to survive the trip... or, put another way, the most defining characteristic of my ego (and many others) is FEAR. Fear is why I stopped taking trips some forty years ago.

The ultimate trip is when perfect love casts out all fear. And it is possible to have such a trip without drugs... just ask Jesus. The problem is, when you go LOOKING for that trip, you become worried that you won't get it, and that fear of not getting it means... you don't get it! (Story of my life.)

spencoid2 profile image
spencoid2 in reply to noahware

I don't analyze music when listening or at least not much. I do not need to completely understand the music to enjoy it. I had a friend many years ago who demonstrated how you can destroy a musical experience or at least not enjoy it the way I like to. I went to the opera with him, forget which one but it was Wagner. He brought the orchestral score and a flashlight, not the libretto, the whole score. Th only joy he seemed to have was when the orchestra departed from the score and he would (softly at least) mumble some sort of ahha. I promised myself I would never destroy music for myself tats way. The farthest I go with analysis is trying to figure out what is wrong with my player piano or stereo. Even if there is something a little off with the piano i can usually fix it with a drink or two or a hit on the joint.

noahware profile image
noahware in reply to spencoid2

That's good. I too can destroy music, by thinking too much. I'm an over-thinker by nature.

My father loved Bach and seemed to be able both think deeply about the music yet still deeply enjoy it viscerally. Usually I'm either one or the other.

Kaliber profile image
Kaliber

dang …. Sorry that wasn’t what you wanted / expected. I was kinda surprised that you were looking to the relatively milder Psilocybe akaloid for the kind of heavy mind experience that you want. I’ve seen people eat those like candy and never mention much of anything to do with introspective , including myself.

Of course LSD is the sure trip down that road, but even guided is “ extremely “ dangerous, mind damage wise , and should be avoided at all costs. What jumps right to mind , along those lines you mention, is either mescaline or peyote. Probably a guided peyote trip foremost , but mescaline right up there with it for sure. Maybe you’d wake up after the post lizard king visions and find that desert lizard lying there on the ground next to you with its head missing yayahahahaya. That’d be a “ good “ voyage nearly guaranteed to deliver “ something “. Yayahahahaya

the most recent alkaloid that’s pursued for ,especially for what you are looking for, is from Ayahuasca ( eye ah WAS ka ) vine . Guided trips usually a must tho … they are supposedly common across the country. You can research them on YouTube and Google. They do include throwing up tho, as do many similar plants, but the akaloid is way strong enough to induce that insightful experience you want.

just my take big guy … I think I kinda realize your angst with the dealing with the premature death thing … I have a magic tool that allows me to avoid too much of that angst, but it took more than 30 years to develop it fully, neither of us would have time to start from scratch now. Still there might be value in trying it, even if from scratch. If you are interested , we can PM about it.

Don’t despair too much buddy, you aren’t anywhere close to exhausting your possibilities yet. Hang in there , you can kick this crap in the arse , you are stronger than you think brother. Humans have a built in “ reserve “ that we mostly aren’t aware of …because we’re never in a position to call upon that reserve , not usually. I’m certain beyond doubt that you have plenty in that reserve tank too. Still you had a fun psilocybin experience, how kewl is that ? Yayahahahaya

❤️❤️❤️

spencoid2 profile image
spencoid2 in reply to Kaliber

now that i have no fear of mushrooms (it had been 40 years since i used them in my youth a few times and had good trips) i will probably wait a few months and take some on my own.

i stated as my goal to deal with fear of death but i really don't have much fear or at least do not obsess about it.

Some of the other drugs sound interesting. I also do want to do MDMA together with my husband to help re-establish our bond that has withered over the years.

At this point I am doing just chemo (and had balls off) and probably have a number of possibilities in the future. Tolerating it well, the only serious problem is not getting much sleep due to hot flashes and frequent urination.

Kaliber profile image
Kaliber in reply to spencoid2

probably a mdma experience together would rekindle some fresh “ wooohooo “ ( yayahahahaya ) … just say’in ….but be careful, check both your physical conditions , ….for example I have adt induced cardiac qrs train scrambled eggs. My trying to experience a mdma run would likely trigger a heart attack in me ( I’m told I might due for a stroke or heart attack due to adt - zometa cardiac damage , to be careful and not over exert myself unnecessarily ). MDMA is a long lasting experience, …..if you start ( say ) this evening it’ll last thru the night and into tomorrow, you’ll feel very depleted ( and sleep a lot ) for several days afterwards. If you’se guys are healthy enough, it should be everything you want from it and more.

Sounds like you have a sound plan with the shrooms, you already know about having to wait to repeat it again ….. I’m pretty sure your experience will allow you to be in more of a controlled situation, …… better than this last one. It should be way more fun too, at home where you are safe. Kewl …

❤️❤️❤️

CAMPSOUPS profile image
CAMPSOUPS in reply to Kaliber

Mescaline was my favorite of the hallucinagines by far. Almost as good as acid visually but able to reign things in if necessary. A really nice head trip too.

Shrooms were fun and not taken as seriously. Although I once or twice I had some acid like experiences with them.

Kaliber profile image
Kaliber in reply to CAMPSOUPS

I’m with you brother …. Mescaline is da bomb. The hammer poisoned me with amanita muscaria mushrooms out of the front yard one time. Put me in E. R. …. There are two kinds of amanita toxins , one does nothing for several days then kills you by destroying your kidneys. The other makes you super sick in a few hours, but doesn’t kill you. 50-50 deal, I got the ones that didn’t kill me. It was a nasty trip as well. Not fun. Yayahahahaya

CAMPSOUPS profile image
CAMPSOUPS in reply to Kaliber

That mushroom looks like a hallucination in and of itself lol.

Yea I think chemo therapy is affording me all the neurotoxin I need now so I will pass on that shroom lol.

Lulu700 profile image
Lulu700

Good job being open minded . Shrooms are good . Ayahuasca is more healing imho . Worth a shot . . It healed my mind and dropped my fear of death by pc completely . It’s a form of spiritual healing . Good luck ! ✌️

spencoid2 profile image
spencoid2 in reply to Lulu700

i have heard good things about Ayahuasca but that it really should be done with someone experienced?

Lulu700 profile image
Lulu700 in reply to spencoid2

yes indeed! They call them a church that run these ceremonies bent on healing . They guide you gently through it all night . They protect you from fear .

TrashPanda72 profile image
TrashPanda72

Make sure to take multivitamins for several days ahead of time…. And if given a choice, during orange juice if possible while going on your trip!

While my experience is all in the past (mostly due to living in a state where everything is illegal), proper preparation made a huge difference in how intense the experience was..

I am not sure how I would feel on a guided experience- I always flew solo, or I acted as a Sherpa…. Also, being comfortable was key to enjoyment, and the deepest introspection happened towards the end, where I was alone and generally getting laying down / getting ready to sleep - no music, white noise if needed - And turning my trip inwards…

spencoid2 profile image
spencoid2 in reply to TrashPanda72

i think it was the continuous music that masked any trippiness that i would have experienced consciously but i might have gotten some unconscious benefit. i actually feel a little calmer. i am putting the stuff together to grow mushrooms. also have maybe a half ounce from a friend. the next trip will be camping in the redwoods. we have a really deluxe camper (no more tent camping for me) that we never use. might have to wait for better weather or we could find some other natural location.

if it were warmer, a moonless night at home would be great, we have a night sky that it amazing.

CAMPSOUPS profile image
CAMPSOUPS in reply to spencoid2

That sounds great. And since its been 40 years for me too I can see why you might have chosen a guide experience but the camping trip sounds great. You already have enough experience to maybe not need a guided trip ?

Plan it though. Make sure your neighbor campers aren't scary looking rough necks lol.

Home is never a bad choice either especially or own.

spencoid2 profile image
spencoid2 in reply to CAMPSOUPS

we know of a place to camp where there are virtually no people. an also find a place on our land. there are some really great places but being in the mountains there is a little potential for danger :)

CAMPSOUPS profile image
CAMPSOUPS in reply to spencoid2

The guides choice of music sounds like might have lessened the trip but when on your own nice to have some of "your music" along as it might be needed. I always "feathered" the trips with cannabis and music.

spencoid2 profile image
spencoid2 in reply to CAMPSOUPS

we have some decent bluetooth speakers we could bring and have about 70000 audio tracks to make a playlist from. however i would love to figure out a program that i could play on my player piano. it plays remarkably, it is the player system that was eventually licensed to Steinway as Spirio. Most of the music I like is pretty heavy classical stuff but I can probably find a mellower (impressionistic stuff probably) but this would require me to be at home since the 9 ft piano is a bitch to move to the redwoods. I'll figure out something

Lulu700 profile image
Lulu700 in reply to TrashPanda72

the same! 👏👏👏👍

One-Eyed-Jack profile image
One-Eyed-Jack

Where is Owsley Stanley when we need him?

CAMPSOUPS profile image
CAMPSOUPS in reply to One-Eyed-Jack

Or the kool-aid bus.

spencoid2 profile image
spencoid2

lost a lot of time doing studies etc thanks to Mr. (I am not a crook) Nixon and his war on drugs.

garyjp9 profile image
garyjp9

As a novice, how can I find a place to do this legally and with a legit guide?

spencoid2 profile image
spencoid2 in reply to garyjp9

i am not aware of any legal trials going on now although a look on clinicaltrials.gov might show something new. you could travel to one of the legal states Colorado Oregon and maybe more.

Bluebird11 profile image
Bluebird11 in reply to spencoid2

About 10 years ago a friend with metastatic breast cancer did a mushroom trip with Columbia Presbyterian Hospital.. it was a trial to help people not fear death...

She found her Spirit Animal.. let go of the fear of death... not sure if this all still exists, referenced on the Internet.. true story, I witnessed this trial was a valid trial and successful.

I was interested because about 45 years ago I did it in the form of tea- had a guide with me, though not interfering. The mushrooms may be altered today just like the cannabis has been. This 'one' experience was not recreational. I prepared for a sacred experience. It changed my life forever. The experience is still vivid in my mind and showed me another dimension of life or reality. I did another two after that also created an opening to more QOL and a wider scope of this reality. My caution today is the adulteration of the mushrooms. Source is important. And, I also believe the environment you place yourself in... to have someone trusted with you though letting you be on your own solo journey.

spencoid2 profile image
spencoid2 in reply to Bluebird11

i plan to grow my own there is a really easy method. only concern is getting good spores but there are supposedly many honest sellers?

Lulu700 profile image
Lulu700 in reply to garyjp9

Cali has it . I’m sure Washington and Oregon have it also . Google it! A lot will come up . It Depends on what state you live in I guess ?

Lulu700 profile image
Lulu700 in reply to garyjp9

Itisnt illegal . No one is arrested for ayehuasca .

spencoid2 profile image
spencoid2 in reply to Lulu700

isn't it recommended to have a guide for ayehuasca

Lulu700 profile image
Lulu700 in reply to spencoid2

imperative

Lulu700 profile image
Lulu700 in reply to garyjp9

Everyone is a novice first time .

spencoid2 profile image
spencoid2

I am a big fan of simple solutions to complicated problems. A great way to make your friends rich.

garyjp9 profile image
garyjp9

Even if I went to one of the legal states, as Spencoid2 suggests, I would still have to find a legit guide, as Lulu700 says. If anyone knows of such a contact, please private message me.

spencoid2 profile image
spencoid2 in reply to garyjp9

not easy to find for illegal drugs. it was a challenge to find one for mushrooms which i believe are not legal in California as someone else suggested. you can search online for ayahuasca which might be what i should have done. anyway my not spectacular trip has a possible positive explanation which i will not detail unless anyone wants me to. I am not suggesting it for anyone else but I did MDMA a few times in my youth and did not find it at all scary.i also did mushrooms maybe two or three times and enjoyed it and found it enlightening. i plan to do it some time soon together with my husband. it is a great bonding drug as well. i think it would be easy to find this as a street drug but i would choose my supplier carefully, recommendation from friend etc.

Lulu700 profile image
Lulu700 in reply to spencoid2

The worst drugs are booze and cigarettes , both legal and taxed, Imagine that ? Compared to what they’re are doing these days( meth , fentanyl ,oxy, ) we were angels just exploring in the 70s. . Now a huge portion of the youth and adults too are suicidal . You almost have to be to doing these kind of drugs that kill …You know it before you do it . There is little help for anyone out here along doing these drugs . My only addictions now are spring water and fresh air and veggies . 😔

spencoid2 profile image
spencoid2 in reply to Lulu700

he have these aplenty in the mountains spring water and fresh air and veggies

Lulu700 profile image
Lulu700 in reply to spencoid2

Us too, Thank God!

spencoid2 profile image
spencoid2

i was referring to the war on drugs as a simple solution to a complex problem not ayahuasca and was being sarcastic about loving simple solutions. and i loved the helicopter assaults in out peaceful mountain retreat in order to bust the pot growers (sarcastic)

Lulu700 profile image
Lulu700 in reply to spencoid2

I lost ten pounds in 3 days , dry heaves and water out the back ,totally spaced out . I never get the flu . A friend brought it in . He drives all over the country . My second visitor since covid ….

spencoid2 profile image
spencoid2

Forgiven, hard to imagine what the Vid can do to your brain. Hopefully it is temporary :) Being on chemo I am trying to avoid covid.

Lulu700 profile image
Lulu700 in reply to spencoid2

On chemo ? Shit! God bless you , get through It! We aren’t vaccinated . I kinda went into hiding with my dx. Before covid . Nobody wants covid . I think that long covid would be a horror . They don’t even know ? All experimental ? But this chemo I hope will save your life . We have many guys here that it’s worked for . You’re going to be one of those . The best that we can hope for is a long term remission . After any treatment we can be diminished . Some guys said they flew through it . I don’t know . I yet to have that pleasure . In the beginning , they were about to port me up . Uro said six months chemo 36 months max to live ,50/50 to get through treatment alive and if I was 63 instead of 53 they would even try it because I wouldn’t survive it . Then I got on a test drug got a pc specialist and did imrt . I was happy to not face the fear of chemo that so many have . If I had only done what the docs said I wouldn’t have pulled through . Imho ..I’m working on 7 yrs now . Let’s get you clear ! Put that pc away and join me in being zero 🙏

CAMPSOUPS profile image
CAMPSOUPS

This post keeps reminding me of the Carlos Castaneda books about the Yakui Indian Don Juan.

spencoid2 profile image
spencoid2 in reply to CAMPSOUPS

isn't that mescaline ? that is another good one for this sort of thing. i read one or two of the books years ago.

CAMPSOUPS profile image
CAMPSOUPS in reply to spencoid2

It is mescaline. Peyote. I read them in order of publication in my youth as did my friends and we imagined when under the influence that we were seeing our "allies" etc. I have forgotten most all of it.

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