Does my son have ADHD?

[Neurosri]

Hi everyone,

I apologize in advance if this is not the right forum for this question.

My almost-5- year-old who is in Pre-K goes to public school in New York City. He has had a rough past few weeks with trouble following directions and being disruptive. Apparently, he walks around in class in the middle of activities and goes to the restroom too frequently. His teacher thinks he is also "fidgety" and can't focus for more than 5-10 minutes. Last week he crumpled up his drawing and put it in the trash because he did not like it, and she took offense to it. On the same day, he spilled milk on his jeans and she says it's because of his restlessness. Once he touched another kid's lunch despite being asked a few times not to. He laughs when confronted for not following directions and she thinks it's because he is "trying to get a reaction".

We have tried counseling him at home, being gentle, being harsh, punishment (no TV/toys), but nothing seems to work and he is not making progress. The only things he has to say about his behavior are that "it's boring" and "please stop asking me". Oddly, he never has an issue going to school or getting ready for it. He goes to martial arts classes twice a week after school and he has had some trouble following directions there as well, but only as much as the other kids, and the classes are pretty late in the day at 5PM.

I have a feeling his teacher is trying to prepare us for an ADHD evaluation, but I am at a loss, and I bring up this question here because he is a totally different person at home. He focuses for 45 minutes at a time on things he enjoys. We actually have a hard time getting him out of his activities and on to meals, bath, or outings. He reads comics, colors, does 50-piece puzzles, does basic math, and builds tracks (he is pretty hyperlexic and has an incredible vocabulary for his age) . We think he is obedient and respectful and I find it hard to believe he does things to evoke reactions in his teacher.

I am wondering if the issue is with the school and it's just that he doesn't find it stimulating, or if he has a selective form of ADHD. If he has ADHD, what are his initial options? Are there behavioral therapy options or is it usually medication? We are open to being evaluated and want to see him make progress. I appreciate your inputs.