Woman with ADHD sort of diagnosis?

[spicysweetpotato]

Hi all,

This is my first post! But I was looking to see who else has had this experience. I was recently (sort of?) diagnosed with ADHD.

Let me explain. So I went to a nurse practitioner as I suffer from some of the WORST time blindness.(i've tried timers but they make me SO anxious and they don't always work) I also am quite forgetful and have lost many phones, wallets jackets to the passage of time in general and will lose things in my own house, additionally I have DOOM piles, and in general have a hard time keeping my house organized and clean. I can get into hyperfocus modes but in general do find it hard to stay on task. College was really difficult for me as I lost my entire system(momlol) for focus and the will to finish tasks anywhere near to on time.

Speaking with my NP, I mentioned that I felt I didn't struggle this much in my youth. Because of this she had originally said "you probably don't have adhd" upon further investigation she said "wow you have a lot of the symptoms that would line up. we should start you on medication".

has anyone else had this non diagnosis/diagnosis? It's been confusing.

Thanks

[Universa1]

Hi,

I am a lot older than yourself but I too have only just realised that I probably have ADHD. I have watched a few short videos on it and the more I watched the more i started to understand how I had struggled for so long especially in certain aspects of my life.

I then started to dig a bit deeper and I have now listened to a couple of audio books (far easier than reading for me as this is one of the things I struggle to keep focus on as I can easily get bored or sidetracked). How to ADHD was the first book and it was really easy to listen to and the best thing about this book was it made me want to investigate more. I then started listening to a book called ADHD explained and this really has been a revelation to me, I already feel like I understand myself like never before and it has given me some amazing tips and tools that I am working on to hopefully change my life for the better.

It did lead me to having a chat with my doctor to where to go next to get more help. Unfortunately she told me that it is a 2 year wait to get diagnosed for ADHD in the UK and if diagnosed it is only to get prescribed drugs for the condition. She explained that after speaking to me that it sounded like I was doing all the right things to help myself so I would probably be better seeing how I got on with my own journey.

It wasn’t quite what I was hoping for because in the book Dr Edward M. Hallowell suggested it may be a good start to speak to a specialist on ADHD first. I was kind of hoping to be able to chat with an expert first or I thought I might get integrated into some kind of group chats with people with the same condition. What my doctor did give me was a link to this group and I am willing to give anything a try so here I go, this is my first time chatting about it.

I hope this helps you and good look with your journey.

I would just like to say that I have accomplished some amazing things in my life so I can definitely relate to it being a superpower as well, who knows where I’d be now if I would have had some help early on in my life. I am looking forward to the next chapter and I am quite excited about it.

[Loutysonsmith in reply to Universa1]

This is such a lovely message, and for me, the best thing about it is that you say you've 'accomplished some amazing things' in your life. As ADHD people, we're so often left thinking that there are only negative experiences in our lives, but it's so important to highlight and nurture our own and each other's strengths too. Louise xxx

[abacaxis]

Hi spicy,

I relate to some of what you shared, and I had a similar feeling of not struggling as much when I was younger and doing well in school (even most of the time through college). It led me to question and not seek diagnosis for a while, and even my psychologist mother said "But you did so well in school!" when I brought it up. 🤦‍♀️

I would say this sounds like your NP did ultimately diagnose you, though not at first. I think that's a common misconception that it's most prominent in childhood, especially for so many of women that are only later diagnosed. I even know a male friend who was dismissed for a long time by his NP because he didn't struggle in childhood, who is now diagnosed & on medication. It doesn't make your diagnosis any less real or valid, and it doesn't mean you didn't have struggles as a child that were unnoticed or masked. I hope you're able to get support for the aspects that you need & learn to work with your brain instead of against it!

I've found gamify-ing self-care, everyday, and important tanks to be very helpful, and I am using the free Finch app which has been great for that! I don't know if you struggle with dental hygiene, but I also have a smart electric toothbrush that tracks my brushing & gives me points (I got it before I even knew I had ADHD 😆).

[Blueiris3]

I've read that it is really common for girls to develop great coping mechanisms and mask until something about life's demands overwhelms those mechanisms. In my case, it was motherhood. All the demands of caring for another human being just completely overwhelmed me. I've figured out the same thing happened to my mom and grandmother although they were never diagnosed. I was diagnosed (full psychiatric testing) at 42 and it explained so much.

What might have tripped you up is that the official diagnostic criteria is that symptoms were present throughout your whole life. Were you considered a dreamy kid or overwhelmed frequently? Inattentive ADHD in girls looks very different than what people expect.