How do you get over task paralysis?

[CerealAllDay]

I'm so overwhelmed at work with lists upon lists of things to do. I feel like I'm always screaming on the inside. And then I'm not capable of doing anything.

I'm so behind and keep telling myself if I can get a little rest I'll be able to recharge and jump into it all but then it doesn't happen.

I've got Vyvanse but I don't think it's helping.

What are some strategies that work for you with what might also be burnout.

I feel like if I can just get caught up my anxiety will disappear and I can manage it all again but I don't know if I'm just kidding myself.

[Nleor623]

I struggle a lot with this too, so I don't have a definitive answer, just things I try that sometimes help. What's your job, or what kind of things are you needing to get done?

Sorry that this will be long, feel free to skim.

To start with, on the medication--if it isn't helping, working on getting your dosage or type of medication changed is important. I've spent so much of my life trying tips and tricks and strategies to get myself to do things. I haven't gotten to the perfect place with meds, but have been close enough at times that some of those things just...aren't as hard anymore.

For example, dishes are a big thing, because I over complicate how they have to be done, and "dirty hand tasks" are difficult, especially wet hand tasks. But when meds are working, it's not that big a deal. I think this is partly due to sensory issues that meds help with, as well as the executive dysfunction aspect.

My main point being, all of these things aren't meant to be as hard or as exhausting as they are, it isn't your fault, and that's exactly what medication is supposed to make easier. It can take time to find the right med and dosage but I wouldn't give up on it.

Also making sure you're eating regularly at work, and as much as is possible getting enough quality sleep--never as simple as it sounds but incredibly important. Your brain is part of your body, and caring for yourself will help you function better as well. I always fall far behind on this when things get hard, because when I have such limited energy and capability, I feel like I can't use it on "unnecessary" things, only on the do-or-die things. Which are the things that cause task paralysis, and I end up exhausted but with nothing done. Time is spent either choked by the anxiety of it, or with useless avoidance tasks. Won't even do anything enjoyable because I'm not allowed until I do what's needed, so instead I'm just messing around on my phone giving myself another 10 minutes...another 5...anything to put it off longer because when the time comes, it feels awful, and I can't even begin to comprehend HOW to do the tasks that need done.

One thing that's helped with that is doing craft type things that can be picked up and put down easy, it can be mindless and meditative, or more involved, depending on what you do. I like fiber arts, so knitting and crochet, and I've started learning to spin yarn with a hand spindle. Very stress relieving, and having a physical product from what you've done feels good, helps woth confidence and self esteem. For a shorter learning curve, friendship bracelets can be fun. These often help me recharge my brain, because it keeps it active but unstressed. And depending on your tasks, you may be able to multi-task, which I find makes things less daunting, though sometimes can be too distracting...

Past that, the best advice that's helped me, is identifying specific barriers, and ways to minimize them. It isn't always easy when you're carrying a load of dire things that are already late, but sometimes you have to remind yourself that getting a little done is better than nothing. Or spending time to make one thing easier long term is worth it. Try and give yourself permission to temporarily put everything else on the shelf for a moment. You can't do it all at once anyway, so no need to carry it all while working on one thing.

Then break down the thing you chose a little more. Sometimes writing out the steps makes it easier, even if you don't reference it again, just to help your brain acknowledge them. Or just thinking--ok, if I do this thing, what is the first action I take to start it? If that action is something you can do, do it. Either the task is easier to do later, or you keep going. Often things are so much easier once started, because your brain needs to shift to that mode before it makes sense.

I know for a lot of people, finishing tasks is the hard part, but if you have trouble even starting, then you need to give yourself permission not to finish. Maybe you will anyway! But if not, you've still gotten things done. And the overall task is less daunting, less weight dragging you down.

As far as getting rid of barriers, for example: with dishes, my barriers are that I don't want to get my hands dirty, especially wet dirty. Ways to work past that: ideally always putting clean dishes up immediately so that dishes can go straight in the dishwasher. Or for handwashing, do just a couple whenever my hands will need washed anyway. Or what's made a lot of "dirty" tasks easier for me: gloves. Sometimes I feel silly like I shouldn't waste, I should just get over it, but honestly, a huge thing is learning to let yourself make things easier for you. Giving up the idea that the things that are hard for you have to be done in a specific or perfect way will destroy a lot of barriers.

Sorry that this is long winded. I guess to sum it up, a big part is giving yourself permission to make things easier on yourself. Not feeling like a failure for not being perfect. Measure yourself by what you have done, not by the list of things you haven't. Then you can get the boost when you do accomplish something, as opposed to just feeling more drained by what's left.

[CerealAllDay in reply to Nleor623]

Thank you. I read every word and I'll re-read them over and over. It means so much to be understood and to see the time you invested writing this to help me and others who will read it is so heart warming. Your words have filled me with so much hope that it can be better. That I can get over what feels like an unscalable mountain.

I know it's an ongoing work in progress for all of us but this makes so much sense to me. I love the idea of a tactile activity with physical proof of accomplishment. I think this is one of my two main struggles. That for every step forward I make I'm set back three with new things to do that I never feel accomplished.

The second is that it is so hard to give myself permission to not be ok, to not be perfect. To be allowed to fail. I have masked for so long that I became known as the go to person but it's caught up with me and now I don't know how to cope or ask for help or how to deal with letting people down.

So thank you again.