My daughter is developing anorexia. This seems to have come out of the blue. At the GP she revealed having problems with eating for 3 1/2 years. She has had body image issues for 2 years and ruminated about this crying herself to sleep. She believed she might have lipodema and I took her to the gp twice to be told it isn’t. I got her a referral to wellbeing but they never got back in touch. In the meantime she had counselling at school but only went to two sessions, she said this was because she doesn’t like talking. She has wondered about adhd because of my experience and we’ve tried to get a referral but it’s been difficult.
At the age of 15 I started to develop a poor relationship with food. (I reckon this was hormones plus a boyfriend told me I was fat…I wasn’t…he was very thin, so maybe I looked fat!) after trying to count calories It developed into binge eating over the years. I identified it as feeling out of control emotionally when I was 20 and had counselling with EDA (now called BEAT) Here I talked about eating to stop me crying and felt it was connected to my dad leaving. I also went to groups. I didn’t really get a better relationship with food. I always felt quite lost. At 23 I went to the Gp and was put on antidepressants. These definitely helped but by age 43 I had had enough of struggling and looked into ADHD. I was diagnosed at age 45 and treatment has definitely turned my life around.
I don’t ruminate like I used to. I have a healthy relationship with alcohol. I have a good handle on my relationship with food albeit a bit random!
My question is… if it’s ADHD causing my daughter problems is it imperative considering her eating disorder is developing into anorexia that this is identified as a matter of urgency…would adhd meds give her the mental capacity to calm and engage in treatment quicker than what treatment she will hopefully be offered through BEAT/GP
thanks for reading and if anyone has any advice on how as parents we can help her please guide us. She is engaging with us and my husband is fantastic at helping her to open up. She’s said she’ll no longer go three days without food…this was after ringing us from her bedroom in the middle of the night. She said she felt like she’d be a failure if she couldn’t get through to the next day of not eating but wanted to eat because her stomach hurt so much…this was perhaps one of the worst nights of my life…knowing she’d been laying in her bed for hours battling with her mind and physical symptoms of starving herself. I hope this experience has made her not do that again (3 days…she’s still doing two days and then eats a small meal) but I’m so frightened the eating disorder will be stronger and as Ive said if she has ADHD will it make the battle even harder to fight it.
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As a parent, I can understand how that would be very scary.
There is also a parent forum on this site, so you might consider posting there, as well. (Many of the parents have younger kids, but some have teenagers or adult children.)
I didn't know anything about a connection between ADHD and eating disorders, so I just searched for information and found this article: additudemag.com/adhd-linked...
• The article confirms that ADHD is indeed tied to a higher incidence of eating disorders, compared to the general population. One study conducted in 2007 concluded that girls with ADHD were 4 times more likely to have an eating disorder.
• It goes on to say the following: "Eating disorders are complicated. Treatment requires a team — usually a psychologist, nutritionist, physician, psychiatrist, and, most often, a family/couples therapist. When someone with an eating disorder also has ADHD, seeing treatment through an ADHD lens is essential. Knowing how the eating disorder is affected by ADHD symptoms, and how it, in turn, affects ADHD symptoms, must be central to treatment. Not managing the ADHD usually leads to treatment failure. If the eating disorder therapist is not an ADHD expert, add an ADHD therapist to the team."
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Help is available. The hardest part might be getting your daughter to engage in her own treatment. (This is just based on my own experience with my eldest daughter who exhibited a lot of behavioral issues as a teenager. But while I think she may have had some body image issues and might have skipped meals, I know that my daughter didn't have a struggle anywhere near as bad as your daughter's... at least not while she was still living at home.)
My heart breaks for what your daughter is going through, and what a toll it's taking on you.
Although I also don’t see actual correlation in studies, I do know several students who take adhd meds and get upset stomach if they don’t eat with the med, but then they choose not to eat for a while. My partner also slides his appetite and stops binge eating when on adhd stimulant meds. Again, it’s not specifically eating disorders, but maybe there is a correlation in that avenue.
Thankyou, I feel like I’m losing my mind, there doesn’t seem to be any urgency from any service. She’s agreed to counselling but the waiting list is 10 weeks! How the hell is she going to survive until then. She saw the Gp yesterday regarding antidepressants who wasn’t keen on her having them, stating what you’ve said but seeming to emphasise talking therapy would be the most beneficial….but THATS NOT AVAILABLE….the adhd team rang me yesterday at my request and they can’t do anything…referring her will take years on the waiting list.
Since there is such a long wait for professional help (which I presume is through the NHS), have you looked into other support options?
You mentioned BEAT in your original post. Does BEAT have any services or resources that might help? When I looked at the organization's website, it even mentioned something about help for carers, like yourself.
I'm mentioning these things to help fill the gap until your daughter gets the professional help that she needs.
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I know that our respective countries, the US and the UK, need to do a lot more to address mental health issues in a timely manner. The more that I learn about mental health needs, the more I find the recommendation that early diagnosis and treatment leads to the best outcome...but there isn't enough effort made on the part of our respective health systems to actually provide early diagnosis and treatment.
I always ask the same question. Your daughter is willing to do something about it because this is not a one-time thing; she must always stick to her plan. However, I suggest you do mindfulness, guided meditation, and breathing techniques. It will slow down your body-mind connection, and you will start making more conscious decisions in a day. The most crucial thing is that a person needs to organize daily goals, and I advise my client to use a notebook or an electronic device to make a daily eating routine.
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