Irritability in the evenings

[MaudQ]

I have always had a hard time transitioning from work to home. Even before I had kids, I would have to decompress before I could even talk to my husband. With kids, it’s worse because I just have to jump into being with them, making dinner, laundry etc. I have built in a little break for myself that really helps but even so, I feel irritable and edgy. More than just grumpy: it’s as if there was a car alarm going off somewhere. I actually used to feel this way all the time until I started taking medication. I’m on Focalin XR (was on Concerta but switched because it was such a pain tracking the Concerta down). I think the Concerta was slightly better at helping me through the transition but the Focalin is fine otherwise. I take the pill at 7 ish, so clearly it’s wearing off by 6. But my day doesn’t end at 6! Any thoughts?

[Mamamichl]

I totally get this. It takes me HOURS to decompress and seem normal, and not verbally assault my family that doesn’t deserve it. Is it because you are not in the best job or because you dread your come and all you have to do when you get there? For me it’s actually the latter. I love my family but I’m already overstimulated and I’m done. It helped having my partner a stay at home and not have to do housework, but we only had that luxury like 2 years.

I hear loop earplugs quiet things down, and my partner bought me noise canceling headphones I can listen play music in to do chores without having to deal with more people. At a ping age, kids can learn not to bother you if you have something specific you’re wearing (like the headphones). That may be helpful even though you have housework to get done. Another option is to ask your partner to take the kids out for the playground so you can have quiet when you get home (if he’s there when they come home). Good partners are definitely necessary. I love my family, don’t get me wrong, but I just want to be by myself to decompress and we don’t always get that luxury with kids in the mix.

I try and use the trip home as a decompression by playing music to get the pent up energy out. Multiple times a day during breaks or before going inside when in the driveway, I use a meditation audio. I use the calm app, loóna or something similar. The 5 minutes extra in the driveway doing grounding techniques and meditation breathing really seem to help me not hate life and family when I walk in the door. I know it’s not their fault, but my condition, so I communicate these carefully and openly with my family, and it helps. At 9, my kid is better able to know I need me time. Not sure how old your kids are.

[Mamamichl in reply to Mamamichl]

Oh! And also, my partner takes his meds I. The morning but takes a booster at lunch time (different med). Ask your doctor if there are options for a booster mid day.

[Gettingittogether]

Tell your doctor and they can give you a small dose to get you through the evening. The dose would be a short term med, not long release like focalin.

Always report this to the provider. Any problems at all! You would probably take the immediate release version at around 5--just guessing here.

Also, you need to find a way to steal 15 minutes to gather yourself. Meditation, a walk, something that lets go of some of the workday stresses before you get home. I stayed at work today to meditate because I knew I had a headache and was not in a good space and when I come home feeling that way I just want to stay on the internet.

[MaudQ]

I think I need to talk to my prescriber. I walk the dog and take a half hour break after work. But just because I’m taking a break doesn’t mean my kids and dogs are! I also happen to love my kids and dogs and don’t want to be crabby and feel like my nerves are going to pop every day!