Hi you guys, so I started a new job, and I'm having the same problems I had on the old one.
But I thought it was because of the many tasks, but my supervisor showed me that I don't have a lot of tasks as I thought.
So I'm felling like crap. I have this non stoping felling of emptyness.
My room looks like a hobo home, so dirty.
I really don't feel meening in life.
I'm so sorry to hear that. What type of work is it ? If I may ask? I use to work at this non-profit organization back in the 90's it was data processing, answering phones,making phone calls, and filing. I discovered that with my ADHD I had a very difficult time staying on task, multitasking, and finishing up on deadlines. Then I was fired and I was miserable. Feeling like crap and empty. I learned from my counselor back then to find another form of work and avoid multitasking work, filing and data entry work. I was making too many clerical errors . I started doing pet care and have been doing it for years. Now, I'm needing a new challenge. I know I will find something. You will find something that will fill that emptiness. I did and it's there.
Back then in the mid-90s when I lost my work, my ex, & everything else was falling apart I attempted suicide. I got help for it and I'm much stronger now.
When I get those feelings like emptiness, and like crap I learned to remind myself that I will get through it. Give yourself a break and take a "me time." That helps me decrease those strong negative feelings and recharge. Spend a day doing something that you like.
Take care of yourself.
Hugs.
I work with HR. I spend most of my time alone, and the only thing I really want to do is EAT.
Hello! I am listening but I am wondering if on top of everything you are simply bored, and not driven at all toward something you may find worth your time. Believe me I understand. I simply need stimulation.
Hi. What helped me is better understand how adhd affects me. This helped, take a look How to adhd YouTube video by Jessica with dr. Howell jobs
Thanks for sharing I’ll look at it now!
I'm so sorry you are feeling this way. I have been there more than I'd like to admit. See if you can take a step back and evaluate what you can change about your career that will inspire you and work with your interests and strengths. My past two jobs have been in customer service and they left me feeling overwhelmed and lacking meaning, I dug into what I really wanted to do in my career, found a 2 year program, and started school this fall. I'm 45, taking all online classes and it's scary as hell. But, it's also the most fulfilling thing I've done for myself. Please just keep looking for what makes you happy.
P.S. My room has always been a mess, but now that I'm working towards something I love, my house has gone from pig sty to just untidy.
You are a inspiration!!! Good luck with school, I'm a Psychologist, and started to work with HR because I can't keep up with patients. But every single day my boss tell's me, '- you are not rude, but people think you are because you are so direct with word's, you need to be better, You act like a little girl sometimes...' some people come to her and complens, lie or misunderstand something.
The only thing I can do is cry, and hate myself, is not easy to change, my brain do not work like they want me to act.
Hey ...
ADHD (if you have it or are ADHD- prone) can indeed mess with you when you try to concentrate. Even if the task is not something you would normally feel negative about, you will still have all other tasks buzzing in the background of your focus. It is distracting and tiring. I sometimes have several tasks at hand and I feel so burdened (knowing that completing one will start more new tasks) I rather chose not to do anything.
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The best way, and it requires some rescheduling of personal values - is to make a list of all tasks (incl job, life, promises you've made etc.). Then divide it all into 3 groups - I the very important ones - that allow you to survive (most job tasks, paying rent etc.), II the ones that you thin are important to keep your life stable (e.g. you promised to spend a weekend with your husband/wife, you probably should not bail on that one), III all the rest of the tasks.
You have to be very critical when evaluating these and really chose priorities.
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So you will now take the group I and do only those.
But not all at once. You will take all tasks in I and then list them in priority order. And then ONLY do the 1. priority. then next etc. You should strive to do 1-3 and not more tasks per day (depending on your tasks).
After you have filled this quota, you will do things from II. Again - prioritizing and then listing them
And III you will do ONLY when you really want to. You will stop thinking about those as obligations.
This way you probably will do 1-4 tasks throughout the day in total. e.g. one big task from I and 3 from II.
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secondly, negotiating with yourself is a good idea - to treat yourself as your own employee. Do the work, but at the same time demand compensations (in form of relaxing and fun)
First: ditto. I find organization a challenge whatever I do. So I chose a job with very little complexity. Over the past 10 years it has gotten more and more complex due to govt requirements, so I quit cuz I am unable to do THAT much detailed paperwork. I’ll find another job. Or now there’s a lot of talk about ADA accommodations. Check out their website. We may have rights as handicapped people soon!
Also, the house. Frustrating. My mentor told me to do 11 things, not 11 tasks— laundry, mopping, etc., but one cup wash, two, saucer wash, three, whatever. Then give yourself the option to do eleven more. Or not. But stay on task with the 11! Try not to get distracted!
You are not alone. There are hundreds of thousands of us (millions?) and we were made with these special brains for some reason. You’ll find it.
Anna -Bre
I'm Brazilian, my government is a mess worst then my room. People are not evolved in here, but I hope some day I can find a job that people understand myself.
I think the point is to become more automated in everything you do, not just train yourself to be a multitasker or hard worker.
If you do 11 things for a month most will become second-nature. You won't think whether you need them, whether you executed them correctly.
As a kung fu master, when he strikes, he does not think about making his fist and extending his hand. It happens 'on its own'.
Conditioning works not only on body, but also mind.
Good advice, but what about behavior, I need to talk lass, do you know something that can help?
joining debate clubs or improv or stuff like that, where you are required to speak publically.
You can't win there if you talk too much. and stage will eventually vreate good talking habits.
next qould be a job that requires you to be precise in your speech
It sounds like you’re dealing with depression too. Do you have a psychiatrist? If you can’t go that route, talk to your general practitioner. You may benefit from an anti depressant. I take wellbutrin which not only helps with depression, but can help with adhd symptoms. It really helped me with motivation and helped me feel like I wanted to do things again after going through a period where nothing was enjoyable or felt worth doing.
I take Alenthus, but doesn't work anymore, my new insurance doesn't pay for a psychiatrist, so the last appointment that I had with the old insurance was a few months ago.
The power w/in YOU is stronger than any struggle!!! PLEASE DON'T EVER GIVE UP!!!
Are you taking medication?
Hello! I understand you. I want to feel useful but it seems no matter what I apply myself to is half assed done and not consistent. I think a lot of us think that the more tasks the better off we would be. No, especially if you are not a typist or great at giving presentations. I really do not know my niche. I have always loved art and people. These two things are an example of two things that play against each other in my reality. I love art but never do it anymore. Love people, would be lonely without them at times, and I push them away, which makes it a love dislike relationship especially when my buttons are pushed. I do not like if someone disagrees with my intentions.
I have anxiety and depression. I understand why people eat more. Depression and the lack of direction is mind numbing. I definitely wish I knew myself or at least who God planned me to be. All these gifts. I feel like a dog chancing it's tail.
I'm sorry you feel like that, I understand, is like exits two of me, the intelligent one, who now's how to act and treat people, who do everything well done, but in reality that's not what happens.
Thanks for replying, I appreciate it.
I can relate to your post. You have just described my situation. It seems as if my brain just can't do all the things that is required of it on any given day. I wish I had more advice to share. Thanks for posting.
Tks for replying!!! Is very good to have people to share.
Believe in yourself and be honest about who you are. I have found that I don't do well in boring repetitive things. My memory is not so hot so I discovered if I really understood the reason behind the task and why I could do many things well but I am no good at explaining how I did it, or the names of whatever. I needed stimulation, new things and changes. Before I even knew I had ADD, I learned how to work within my constraints. For example, I was a RN who worked in Labor and delivery and I started at a time when things were changing so many things were new to this part of nursing. Because of this I could fit in and learn with everyone else. I also started work in forensics, using nurses was new then in that field. I enjoyed it and was just as incompetent as everyone else, but we learned together and got better. So new things, changing environment, new patients, busy a lot and sometimes not.
This is what worked for me and I was good at what I did too. with a basic understanding of how things worked and trusting my gut feelings. Plus a lot of prayers.
I love how talking with you all I can understand and put down in words some things that I couldn't explain. I need to understand the meaning, and the entire process of something to execute the task too.
Ditto☝🏻Except I no long have said job! It doesn’t matter what type, how many hours, easy or hard! They love me then I’m too much! I’m wore out!
There it is! Exactly!
Feeling stuck
Side effects of meds
Ugh! Feeling heart broken.
Feeling lost and hopeless
Need advice on managing ADHD as an adult & parent
