22 at Community College - Feeling Discouraged

[barnyardbees]

First post, hi.

I never did well in school and never thought I would go back. But when I moved to a college town and saw everyone I knew doing it, I thought I might be able to pull it off.

I've been enrolled full time for two semesters now and have flunked or withdrew from all my classes sofar. I just recently got diagnosed with ADHD and otherwise don't feel like I'm cut out for this. I've been talking to advisers and trying to make a plan. I just feel so bad because I'm living in student housing as a community college student, surrounded by other students pursuing degrees at a prestigious 4 year university. I just spent the past two days working on an essay for a class I'm bound to fail.

Some folks have encouraged me to go to trade school, but I can't stand the thought of that.

I'm just full of shame and am in denial of my working class background. I don't know what I'm doing.

[resee]

There is absolutely nothing wrong with being working class. You should embrace it. Your family is the backbone of the country, and the elite and white-collar workers will never be able to say that. Trade school is always an option. Did you know that construction superintendents, journeyman, and plumbers make more money then most white-collar workers? Never be ashamed of Who You Are... You can make a good life for yourself without getting a degree, I know I have. Since I have ADHD too, it's been very hard to stick to college. I've been in four different colleges, have enough credits to have a bachelor's degree, but don't because the credits are spread out in everything. I'm just giving up, realizing that I don't need to go to college. You don't either. You're still a good, valuable human being regardless if you have that degree or not. Success is not measured by a piece of paper, but it's measured by you being true to yourself and others.

[barnyardbees in reply to resee]

I'm glad there are people who value the people in the background. I definitely know there is nothing inherently wrong with being working class. But I have lived the lifestyle and would like to say it's not for me and feeling like I don't get to make that decision is troubling. Especially when you see how shorted and hated the working class can be. So I'm trying to learn to value myself regardless of where I end up. I really appreciate your response! There were a lot of things I was happy to hear from another person.

[vvllbs]

Don't give up I was in the same boat when i was your age and now I have two masters

[barnyardbees in reply to vvllbs]

I'm glad you were able to accomplish that! It's good to have role models in many different walks of life and hearing this is encouraging. Not just for me I'm sure, but others as well.

[unfocused]

Trade school is awesome! I did great in college and all that but suck at actually working, so I went and learned a trade that suits me and it's made a huge difference. If you learn welding or pipe fitting or plumbing or electrical work you will probably never have trouble finding work for the rest of your life. Trades seem perfectly suited to ADHD-ers, because you get really, really good at one thing, and every day you do that one thing but maybe in a different place or different way. Everyone relies on skilled tradesmen, whether we acknowledge it or not! If your community college has basic trade classes, maybe give them a shot, or ask to sit in on one. But seriously- without the folks who fill potholes, fix bridges, clean windows, build houses, wire sound, install cell towers, replace street lamp bulbs... our lives would be considerably less good. And the best part is that many of these trades are desperate for workers and may educate on the job. Give it some thought! College really isn't for everyone, and if it's not working for you, theres no shame in finding a better route.

[barnyardbees in reply to unfocused]

Thank you so much for this! You're right, there is so much work out there that goes unnoticed but is so important and is good for job stability. I think one problem I'm facing right now is I'm more anti-establishment than does me good. I'm a decent worker but it just kinda makes me miserable. I may have misdirected my line of thinking and convinced myself that the reason I am unhappy is because of the fact that we are forced to work. Even though it's bigger than that. I'm unhappy for a multitude for reasons, not just because I don't want to work! So I'm trying to show up for myself and put in the work, not only literally at a job, but also in self care and the like. This whole life thing isn't easy no matter what and I appreciate hearing from others that it's going to be okay. Thanks for the encouragement!